[Copypasta] do u think that yoshi gets embarrassed (Shakespearean English)

Dost thou ponder if yoshi's constitution becomes discombobulated whence eggs are excreted afore Mario's gaze? My sincere apologies if thy bristles were tussled, however I believe this to be quite amusing. And, I am curious to perview a charcoal etching of this event, if only for a rousing chuckle. I'm also perplexed whence trying to place what eldritch odor would arise. This is only for a gaff, a ruse, merriment per se, I would like to smell them.
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

i start cracking bongland jokes inna bri'ish accent. Am I the asshole?

>hanging out with friend group >one guy facetimes some british slag he knows >i start cracking bongland jokes inna bri'ish accent >say she sounds like hermione >Make some joke about earl grey tea >she says, "ask this fuck'a how you even make earl grey tea >Say, "toss it in the boston harbor" >bongchick gets all pissed off >friend asks me to leave Am I the asshole?
June 2021

greentext

British People

Crewmate pickle

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⡾⠿⠿⠿⠿⢶⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣈⣻⣷⡄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡇⠀⠀⣾⣟⠛⠋⠉⠉⠙⠛⢷⣄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣴⣶⣿⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⢹⡆ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⠿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠛⢻⡇⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣈⡇⠀⣿⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠋⠀⢸⡟⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠃⠀⠀⢰⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣸⡟⠀⣴⠖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⣿⠀⠸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⡏⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⣾⠃⠀⠀⠈⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⣸⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠪⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣧⠀⠀⠀ ⢰⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⡾⠋⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⠁⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡆⠀⣰⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡆⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣄⠁⠀⣰⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⣧⢈⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠶⠶⠋⢀⣼⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠈⢻⣦⠓⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠙⠿⠶⣶⣤⣤⣶⡶⠿⠛⠉⠀
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021

Kripp and Larry Page, CEO of Google

twitchquotes: Hᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, Lᴀʀʀʏ Pᴀɢᴇ ʜᴇʀᴇ, CEO ᴏғ Gᴏᴏɢʟᴇ. Yᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍɪɴɢ ᴄᴏᴘʏʀɪɢʜᴛ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ ғʀᴏᴍ Bʟɪᴢᴢᴀʀᴅ Eɴᴛᴇʀᴛᴀɪɴᴍᴇɴᴛ™. Pʟᴇᴀsᴇ sᴛᴏᴘ ɪᴍᴍᴇᴅɪᴀᴛᴇʟʏ ᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄʜᴀɴɴᴇʟ ᴡɪʟʟ ʀɪᴘ ɪɴ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀɪɴᴏ.
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

Kaceytron's Porn Producer

twitchquotes: KACEYTRON, HERE'S YOUR PORN PRODUCER CALLING YOU OUT! I COULDN'T REACH YOU ON PORNHUB OR BRAZZERS, SO I'M CALLING YOU OUT HERE ON THE TWITCH CHAT, HOPE YOU DON'T MIND! WE JUST SCHEDULED A NEW MOVIE CALLED "KING DONGER" YOU'LL BE THE MAIN STAR ALONG WITH BEN D'OVER AND KINKY KONG! COME OVER TOMORROW AT 12PM, WE START PRODUCTION AT THAT HOUR. IF YOU DO WELL, YOU'LL HAVE AN EXTRA. <3 XOXO
twitch chat
June 2014
Kaceytron
Text-to-Speech Playing