[Copypasta] would you mind answering my question? Who the fuck asked?

twitchquotes: PLEBS Have you for one second indulged yourself, your mind, your brain to think that the shit you just spew could be taken as an advice/ backseat/ tip which is ON ALL CAPS in the title telling you against it. Now when you’ve contemplated well on this thought, would you mind answering my question? Who the fuck asked? PogO
twitch chat
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
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My poop story

twitchquotes: My poop story. I lived in a dookie (pun on purpose) apartment complex in a college town, literally $300 a month, on a river in the south. So a small and always very high maintenance team worked for them. They showed up (stoned) and were changing everyone’s filters. Heard. Ok come in. I had a particularly funky little caesars pizza not an hour before the incident. We were making small talk and such as these things tend to linger, I suddenly felt a disturbance in my lower gut (bubbleguts). I felt confident in my distance from the maintenance guy that I got squeeze out a fart and then distract him into another room. This was no fart. At slightest bit of effort I put towards this fart a flood of terrible pizza diarrhea shot out of my ass like a goddamn rocket. As I was staring this man in the eye. I was staring another human being in the eyes...while I pooed my pants. To this day not only do I have no clue if he knew or not but I would still pay thousands of dollars to just see my face when that happened. That is my poop story.
twitch chat
June 2019

Coke Gaming ad script

twitchquotes: Oh my god, what the hell? what's going on? What, oh my god. Coke, are you serious right now? COKE GAMING WHAT! You are invited to the Twitch Partner Program! HI, I Just got partnered. We got partnered boys. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! What! Coke Gaming, what Is this? 10,000 bits? Coke Gaming, thank you so much for the 10,000 bits! Thanks. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you Coke.
twitch chat
December 2019

⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my penis was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
August 2021

As a MOTHER, I am OUTRAGED

twitchquotes: imaqtpie WHAT THE FUCK, where is your DAMN viewer age RESTRICTION?! This shit you put on your stream is too SCARY for kids, you need to warn people. As a MOTHER, I am OUTRAGED.
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

Puck the Folice

twitchquotes: ლ༼ ▀̿̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿ლ༽ Ｐｕｃｋ Ｔｈｅ Ｆｏｌｉｃｅ ლ༼ ▀̿̿Ĺ̯̿̿▀̿ ̿ლ༽
twitch chat
April 2014
imaqtpie
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