[Copypasta] Is buttcheeks one word

twitchquotes: Hey [streamer name], it's Ashley Jones from secondary school. I remember you were the best English student back in the day so I figured I would hop in the stream to ask you a question for the GMAT. Is buttcheeks one word, or should I spread them?
twitch chat
May 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Today I attempted to insert a whole cantaloupe melon

twitchquotes: Today I attempted to insert a whole cantaloupe melon into my anus because the local shops had run out of apricots (I buy a lot). Using about a gallon of butter, breathing techniques and a few hours I managed to finally get it inside. However it was too uncomfortable so I tried to shit it back out.This is where things got confusing because rather than a melon sliding out half a dozen apricots did. Now there is a chance that I just blacked out upon excreting the cantaloupe and it rolled away somewhere and that I happened to have a dozen or so left over apricots lying around my rectum from earlier but I cannot for the life of me find the melon anywhere.I think I may have the power to anally turn melons into apricots. Further experimentation will be required of course (once my rectum has recovered) but if this turns out to be true then I may be able to solve world hunger.
twitch chat
April 2019

Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla

December 2021. Cathie Wood owns 100% of palantir and 110% of Tesla (Elon Musk invented a more efficient form of security). ARK ETFs are trading at minimum $1,000 a share and investors are signing 10-year pledges just for the privilege. I log on to my Tesla taxi app and order a car. A vintage Roadster pulls up with EDM playing at a tasteful volume. "Where to, King?" asks the anime girl on the console. "You know where", I reply. Palantir knows. We both laugh and the car takes off to Wendys.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

Absence of the "legendary" card back

twitchquotes: ( ರ Ĺ̯ ರೃ ) Hello Kripparian. Reginald and Dan Dinh, Owners of Team SoloMid™ here. We gained access to your Hearthstone account and couldn't help but notice the absence of the "legendary" card back. This poorly reflects on Team SoloMid, and, as such, we have decided to remove you from the team. Please return your jacket. Thank you ( ರ Ĺ̯ ರೃ )
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

AYAYA star

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⡴⠶⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⠶⢦⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⡟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⢻⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣠⡾⠋⠈⣿⣶⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣶⣿⠁⠙⢷⣄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣴⠏⠄⠄⠄⠸⣇⠉⠻⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣴⠟⠉⣸⠇⠄⠄⠄⠹⣦⠄⠄ ⠄⣼⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⡆⠄⠄⠙⠷⣦⣴⠾⠋⠄⠄⢰⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣧⠄ ⢰⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣷⠄⢀⣤⡾⠋⠙⢷⣤⡀⠄⣾⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⡆ ⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣷⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⣾⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⠟⠉⢻⡄⠄ AYAYA ⠄⣾⡟⠉⠻⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⣿⡀⠄⢀⣴⠞⠋⠄⠄⠄⠈⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⠁⠄⠄⠄⠙⠳⣦⡀⠄⠄⣿ ⠸⣧⠾⠿⠷⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⢾⣷⠶⠶⠶⠶⣾⡷⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠾⠿⠷⣼⠇ ⠄⢻⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⡄⠄⠄⢠⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⡟⠄ ⠄⠄⠻⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣷⠄⠄⣾⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⠟⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠙⢷⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣇⣸⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⡾⠋⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠳⣦⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣴⠞⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠳⠶⣦⣤⣼⣧⣤⣴⠶⠞⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
April 2020

Weebs

I hope you enjoy being tucked

twitchquotes: The year was 1999. A much younger trump was getting ready for bed when his mother entered the room. "Sweetums, it's much past your bedtime!" she chides. Obediently, Trump climbs into bed. As his mother lovingly lays the covers over him, she whispers "I hope you enjoy being tucked."
twitch chat
February 2015
Trump
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