[Copypasta] Bowling simulator: E-Bowler

twitchquotes: Hello my name is Kenneth Jizbombski, president of Viral Games, Inc. Recently sales of our most popular Bowling simulator "E-Bowler" have plummeted. Please help my small company by going out and getting E-Bowler any way that you can. I want E-Bowler to spread infecting people with it's incredible gameplay!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Kripparrian is Illuminati Confirmed

twitchquotes: Kripparian's true name is Octavian. Octavian is derived from the Latin word for 8. Latin was the language of Rome. Rome fell to Barbarians. Kripp played a Barbarian. Barbarian is 9 letters. Kripparrian is 11 letters. 9/11. Kripparrian is Illuminati Confirmed.
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Dex sits in a huge doghouse

twitchquotes: A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a huge doghouse. Full and content because of his "kibbles and bits" diet, he's too happy to move. He's so happy, and enjoys life. He knows his owner has hope of a 12 win run. He knows he could draw attention to himself, since he's the king of his house. In a single act of pride, Dex barks to give Kripp his praise. "Good boy Dex" is his response.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

Dear Kripp, I am a salt manufacturer from Chile

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, I am a salt manufacturer from Chile and I would like to sponsor you and your channel. If this deal goes through you can make a lot of salt from our overflowing salt mines. From what I hear, salt is a hot commodity nowadays. Forever yours, Felipe Gomez
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

My 13 year old son wants 5 dollars so he can "subscribe"

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, mom here, my 13 year old son wants 5 dollars so he can "subscribe". I dont know what that is, but a quick Google search shows Kripp subscribers are linked with NaCL overdose disorder. Can you explain this? - Sincerely, a concerned parent
twitch chat
May 2015
Kripp

salty

ATTENTION 2003 KIDS

twitchquotes: ❗️❗️❗️ATTENTION 2003 KIDS❗️❗️❗️!!! This πŸ‘‡ is the last year of being a kid πŸ˜”πŸ‘¦πŸ‘§! Because NEXT πŸ‘‰YEAR! We gon be T33N4G3RSπŸ’πŸ™…πŸ’…!! PARTYING πŸŽ‰πŸ’ƒ DRINKING 🍻🍸🍹🍷 MAKING OUT AND SEX πŸ‘…πŸ’¦πŸ˜³ PERIODS 😩🍫 HEARTBREAKS πŸ’”πŸ˜ͺ MIDDLE SCHOOL SOPHOMORES (7TH GRADE)
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing