[Copypasta] A scholar hates twitch chat

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today, I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine signaling my impending, earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen EVERYONE in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever had, or ever will produce shot out SO HARD that my dick was ripped apart by my Übernut, accelerating to 5% of the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, it barely slowed before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear powered angle grinder. the sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of illinois became pregnant with my children.

July 2021

Classic

Every E-Sport needs their clown

twitchquotes: Every E-Sport needs their clown. We are privileged to have someone like Kripp in the Hearthstone community.

twitch chat

November 2014

Kripp

The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas

The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas, and has successfully executed her forced feminization program, converting 72% of the us male population into women, the remaining 28% either existing peacefully as femboy subs or have fled the country, if they're lucky. All references to Dr. Seuss, Mr. Potatohead, and other such martyrs and thoughtcrimes will lead to prompt and inevitable cancellation by means of Jewish space laser. All statues of white people have been torn down and replaced with statues of AOC alongside Mao Zedong and Che Guevara, and the public has thus collectively forgotten about Robert E. Lee. The constitution has its 28th amendment, codifying mandatory cock and ball torture for all penis-having citizens no less than twice a week. It is illegal to say "Merry Christmas". Heterosexual relationships are strictly forbidden. Attack Helicopter, with pronouns brr/brrs, is a gender recognized on the official list of 93. The police have been almost entirely defunded, nationally having an annual budget of $5.30, enough for a single Big Mac Combo Meal. There is a new arm of the state, namely the "rape police" whose sole duty is functionally a secret task force to ensure all consent is affirmative and enthusiastic. All citizens must pledge allegiance to the LGBTQIA+ rainbow flag and swear oaths on White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo. All g*mers have been deported. Mexico is now the 53rd state, behind Puerto Rico and Washington DC. All bathrooms are gender-neutral. Marxism, the theory proposing the government do a lot of things, has become the official state ideology, including mandatory education on critical race theory beginning in pre-K. White people are second class citizens, guilty of being white, and all white people must publicly apologize on the behalf of their race as a coming-of-age ceremony at the beginning of pubescence. Facts now care about feelings. We will no longer be subjugated by AOC and her inner party, the Squad. The Culture War is not over. We will not be cancelled. We are the resista— radio static

March 2021

Jerry (Tom and Jerry)

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▓█▒▒▓█████████▓▓██████░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░▓░░░██████▓▓▒▒█████▒▓▓▓▓███ ░░░░░░░░░░░▓███░███▓▓▒▓▓▓███████▓▓█▓▓▓██ ░░░░░░░░░░▓██████▓▒▓▓▓▓▓███▓█████▒█▓███▒ ░░░░░░░░░░█████▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█▓▒▓▒████▒██▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░░░░██████▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓███▒██▒▓▓▓ ░░░░░░░░░██▒▓█▓▒██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒███▒██▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░░░▒█▒▓▓█▒██▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒███▒██▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░░░███▓▓▓▓█░░█▓▓▓▓████▓▓▒██▓▒█▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░░▒████▒▒██░▒█▓▓▓██▒░██▓▒██▒▓█▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░░██░░████▒░▓█▓▓██░░░██▓▒██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░░██░░████░░████▓░░░░██▓▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░░█░░░█▓▒█░▒█░██░░░░░██▓▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░▒█░░░█░▒▒░▓▒▒█░░░░░░█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░█▓░░░█▒▒▒▒▒░█▒░░░░░▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░█▒░░▒█░▒▒▒░▓█░░░░░░██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░█░░░▒█░▒▒▒░█▒░░░░░▒█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░█░░░▓█░▒▒▒░█░░░░░░██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░██▓░▓▓░▒▒░▒███░░░▒█▓▓▓███▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░███░▓▓░▒▒░▓███▓░░██▓▓███▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░███▒▓▓▒▒▒░█████░▒█▓▓██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░███▒█▒▒▒▒░████▓░██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░░░███▒█▒▒▒▒░████▒░█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓████▓▓▓▓▓ ░░░░▒▒███▒█▒▒▒▒░████░██▓█▓▓█████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ █▓███████▒█░▒▒▒░████░█▓██████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ █████████▒█░░░▒▓████▓█████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ █▓▓█░░░░████▓██▓░░░░▒▓██▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ █▓██░░░█▓░░░██░░░░░░▓░█▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▓ ████░░░███████▓░░░░░▒▓██████████████████ ▓▓▒█░░░▒██████░░░░░░▒░██▒▓▒▒▒▓▓███▓▓▓███ ▓▓▓██░░░▒███░░░░░░░░░░███▓█████▓██▓▓▓▓▓▒ ▓▓▓▓█▓░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▓██████▓▒░░░█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓██░░░█▒░░░░░░▓███████▒░░░░░██▓▓▓▓▓▓ ██▓▓▓▓████████████████████░░░░░▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ███▓▓▓█▒▒▒░░░█████████████░░░░░██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░▒███▓█▓░░░░░░████████████░░░░░█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█ ░░░░▓███░░░░░░███████████░░░░░▒█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█ ░░░░░░██▒░░░░░███████████░░░░░██▓▓▓▓████ ░░░░░░░▓█▒░░░░██████████░░░░░▒█▒▓▓████▒░ ░░░░░░░░░█▓░░░▓████████░░░░░▓██████▒░░░░ ░░░░░░░░▓███░░░███████░░░░███████▓░░░░░░ ░░░░░░███████▒░██████░░░▓███▒▒▒▓███░░░░░ ░░░░███▓▓▓▓▒██░░▒██▓░░░███▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██░░░░ ░░▒███▒▓▓▓▓▒██▓░░░░░░▓███▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██░░░ ░███▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█▓█▓░░░▓██▓██▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒██░░ ██▓▓▓▓▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██████▒██▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒██░ █▒▓▓▓██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██▓▒▓▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒██ ▒▓▓▓████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒█ ▓▓██▓░██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒ ▒██░░░██▓▓▓▓████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ██░░▒░█▓▓▒███▒▒██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ █░▒▒░▓█▓▒██▒░░░██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░▒▒▒░██▒██░░▒▒░██▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ▒▒▒▒░█▓██░░▒▒▒░██▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ▒▒▒░▒███░░▒▒▒▒░██▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ▒▒▒▒▒██░░▒▒▒▒▒░██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ▒▒▒▒▒▓▒░▒▒▒▒▒▒░██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓

ascii art

September 2021

Dear Twitch Partners, Our community members are always our priority

twitchquotes: Dear 👋 Twitch Partners 🤝 , Our

community members 👪 are always ☑️ our priority 🛑. We received 📥 some reports ❗ describing ⌨️ the discomfort ☹️ some of our members 🗣️ felt after a Twitch Rivals 🤼 participant used "KE*W" and "mo*kaS," 😶 both emotes are often ⏲️ used in toxic 💀 contexts. Please 🙏 refrain from using such emotes, and use KEKHeim & CaitlynS instead 👍. Best regards 👋, Twitch Team 💌

twitch chat

November 2021

[Copypasta] A scholar hates twitch chat

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today

Classic

Every E-Sport needs their clown

The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas

Jerry (Tom and Jerry)

Dear Twitch Partners, Our community members are always our priority

Confirm Subscription