[Copypasta] I microwaved my jizz again.

Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

eat hot chip and lie

twitchquotes: any female born after 1993 can’t cook… all they know is mcdonald’s , charge they phone, twerk, be bisexual , eat hot chip & lie
twitch chat
November 2020

Fortnite default dance 8

β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Άβ£Ώβ£Ά β €β €β €β£€β£€β£€β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ β €β €β£Άβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ά β €β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ ⠀⠀⣿⣉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⠉⣿⣢ β €β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ώβ£Ώ β €β£€β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ώβ €β£Ώβ£Ά β£€β£Ώβ Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ώβ €β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ£€ β ‰β ‰β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ €β €β ’β ›β Ώβ Ώβ Ώ β €β €β €β ‰β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ €β €β €β €β €β €β ‰ β €β €β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ά β €β €β €β €β£Ώβ ‰β Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ β €β €β €β €β£Ώβ£€β €β ›β£Ώβ£Ώ β €β €β €β €β£Άβ£Ώβ €β €β €β£Ώβ£Ά β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£­β£Ώβ£Ώ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£€β£Ώβ£Ώβ ‰
ascii art
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

YEP COCK is modern expression of bacchic spirit

twitchquotes: Those plebs simply dont get it, all those who oppose YEP COCK are nothing more than a band of simpletons. YEP COCK is modern expression of bacchic spirit. YEP COCKER entering a chat is like priest of Dionysus Enorches, wielding a thyris and bearing wreath of grapevine. As the elder priest leading cultists in state of bacchic haze to sacred Eleusis YEP COCKER announces the unbridled joy of YEP COCKERY by the simple sign of YEP COCK which lets everyone forget of their quotidian struggles.
twitch chat
June 2020

Fuck you all, I’m never listening to this sub again.

Yesterday I said we’d see a rally like we’ve never seen before I was ridiculed and the market went down this morning so I accepted defeat and sold my nvda calls and got tesla puts. My account is down bad right now. I also hedged with a tesla call so hopefully I’ll make something. Somehow oil also tanked. Fuck you all. I’m only listening to myself now. You’re all retarded and so am I for listening to you. Edit: not sure why some of you degens think I’m blaming you. Of course it’s my fault. This is a shitpost update. Stop taking it so seriously you retards See you tomorrow
March 2022

WallStreetBets

TriHard

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–„β–‘ β–€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–Œ β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–Œβ–’β–„β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–β–’β–‘β–’β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–“β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ ░░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▄▄▐░░▐░░░░ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–„β–“β–“β–’β–“β–„β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–“β–β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–Œβ–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
ascii art
November 2014
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing