[Copypasta] I microwaved my jizz again.

Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Don't let your dreams be memes

twitchquotes: YESTERDAY YOU SAID TOMMOROW, Don't let your dreams be memes, Don't meme your dreams be beams, Jet fuel won't melt tomorrow's memes, DON'T LET YOUR STEEL MEMES BE JET DREAMS
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July 2015
imaqtpie

Only the chosen one can stack these cans!

twitchquotes: DrinkPurple Only the chosen one can stack these cans! PogChamp DrinkPurple but wait PogChamp can you do three cans! PogChamp PogChamp !! DrinkPurple
twitch chat
August 2016

Classic

Uganda Knuckles

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣤⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣋⣩⣭⣭⣭⣉⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⣠⣴⣭⣹⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢣⣼⣿⣿⠛⠁⠘⠿⠿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠛⠛⠁⣿⣿⡯⣫⣤⣴⣶⣶⣤⣭⣛⡸⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⢀⣴⣷⠬⣉⣀⣈⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣮⣝⣛⣯⣤⣤⣤⣤⣭⣛⠿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠈⠉⣽⣶⣶⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⢛⡛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣷⡌⢻⣿ ⣀⢰⣿⣦⡝⠛⢷⣮⡛⠻⣿⣿⣿⠿⢛⣫⣵⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⣣⣾⣿ ⣿⢸⣿⡿⠀⣿⣶⣝⢿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⣩⣵⣶⠇⣿⣿⣿⢹ ⣿⢸⣿⠀⡇⢹⣿⣿⡶⠎⣙⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢟⣛⣩⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⡟⣸⣿⣿⠇⣸ ⣿⡇⠛⢠⣿⡀⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠁⠀⣿⡿⠃⠀⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣷⡘⢿⡇⢸⣦⣤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣤⡄⠼⢋⣴⡇⠸⢋ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣮⡃⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⡿⢀⣠⣾
November 2018

I couldn’t tell you what half of the companies in my portfolio do

I couldn’t tell you what half of the companies in my portfolio do or even what the ticker stands for...but you better believe I’m jacked to the mf’ing tits in every single meme stonk that you crayon eaters have been pumping. CHOO CHOO MF’ER.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Sloth

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠻⠿⢿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠈⠉⠉⠄⢠⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⡬⠛⢿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⡿⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠅⠄⠅⠄⠐⠄⠄⠄⠁⠤⠄⠛⢿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠍⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⠄⣀⣠⣀⠄⢈⣑⣢⣤⡄⠔⠫⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡏⠂⠄⠄⢀⣠⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣮⣔⠂⡙⣿⣿ ⡿⠄⠄⣠⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣈⣿ ⠇⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⠿⢿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡧⣼ ⠄⠄⠽⠿⠟⠋⠁⠙⠄⢠⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡠⢌⣧⠄⠈⠛⠉⠛⠐⡋⢹ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣾⡿⠑⠚⠋⠛⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡄⢀⣀⣀⡀⠈⠄⢸ ⣄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣾⠟⠋⠛⠛⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠒⠂⠛⡿⢟⠻⠃⠄⢼⣿⣿⣷⠤⠁⢸ ⣿⡄⠄⢀⢝⢓⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠠⠶⢺⣿⣯⣵⣦⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⢸ ⣿⣿⡀⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠠⢾⣷⣄⢄⣀⡈⡀⠠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢏⣀⣾ ⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠈⠈⠙⠑⠗⠙⠙⠛⠄⠈⠹⠻⢿⡻⣿⠿⢿⣝⡑⢫⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⠐⠚⣨⣤⣾⣿⣿
November 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing