[Copypasta] Do NOT meet Robert Downey Jr. in real life!

Mesothelioma ad script

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March 2021

If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.

May 2021

Gru and Spongebob fanfic

August 2021

Spongebob

NSFW

Gru abruptly turned around to survey the restaurant, and barked out an order to the minions. "Vring him here! To zhat table!" Gru barked as he pointed at a large, empty table. The minions babbled and seized Spongebob and hoisted him to his feet before throwing him down on the table. Gru had grabbed some rope in the struggle and bent over Spongebob's body, putting his full weight on Spongebob. His crotch prodded against Spongebob's stomach and a curious sensation was being aroused in Spongebob. Gru tied the rope to the table, and around Spongebob's arms. Before long, Spongebob was restrained to the table by all his limbs. Gru stepped back to observe Spongebob and to ensure that he wasn't going to escape from his restraints. The minions eagerly crowded around Gru's legs and babbled excitedly. Gru's hands moved down towards his pants and started to unbuckle his belt. Spongebob's eyes widened and he started thrashing and screaming for help, help that was never going to come. As he was struggling against his restraints, Spongebob's eyes met Squidward's and he had also started desperately trying to free himself. His screaming was muffled against the gag and tears had started streaming down his face again. Gru's pants were now around his ankles, and his penis now bulged against his thin underwear. A bush of pubic hair faintly curled outside of his briefs. His eyes had never once left Spongebob's still thankfully covered lower half. Almost as if he read Spongebob's mind, Gru suddenly stepped forward and quickly ripped Spongebob's underwear in half. He had moved so fast that Spongebob didn't have time to scream before Gru slapped his hands over Spongebob's mouth. Gru groaned and grinded his body against Spongebob's, now naked, completely exposed and tied up. Spongebob whimpered as Gru put his lips next to Spongebob's ear. He licked his earlobe and breathed heavily, as he grinded his dick harder against Spongebob's tiny body. "So hot and tight, aren't you?" Gru moaned huskily. "You a virgin?" Gru asked, leaning back to see Spongebob's face. An evil grin slowly spread across Gru's face at Spongebob's lack of response.1 "Oh ho ho ho, is it my birthday?" Gru chuckled darkly. Spongebob cringed and began to cry harder. Was this how he was going tolose his virginity? He had always dreamed of losing it to Squidward, as his tentacly arms held Spongebob and sweetly, gently, made love to Spongebob. Now this strange man and these creatures were going to...rape him? This couldn't be happening. The minions had been watching Gru and Spongebob, completely enraptured. Their eyes were wide with wonder and some of them had hands down their pants, playing with themselves. Soft little moans arose from some of their mouths. Gru lowered his face to Spongebob's groin, and smiled up at him. "I'm feeling generous, little sponge. I'll suck you dry, don't vorry." Gru said lustfully. Gru took Spongebob's little cock into his mouth and began sucking. He could taste the burgers Spongebob the Slut ate all day long. Spongebob whined, but those whines slowly changed to moans as Gru began running his tongue across the tip of his cock. A knot began forming in Spongebob's stomach and his cock began twitching. Gru smiled, still with Spongebob's cock down his throat. Spongebob moaned as burger juice shot down Gru's moist throat. Spongebob felt like he was in heaven. Gru drew his mouth away and strings of burger juice connected his mouth to Spongebob's slimy, half-erect cock. Gru suddenly forced Spongebob's mouth open and spat out the remaining cum directly into his mouth. "Taste your cum, leetle sponge." Gru smirked evilly. Spongebob's eyes widened as Gru forced his mouth shut and forced him to swallow it. Tears welled in Spongebob's eyes as the sour burger-juice taste of his cum went down his throat. Gru released Spongebob's mouth and stepped backwards. He started taking his underwear off, and his 40-inch cock was released from its cage. Spongebob's eyes almost popped out of his sockets.

Doublelift: I don't make many mechanical mistakes

twitchquotes: I'm really confident that we'll be the way better bot lane. (Laughs) I see games where G2's bot lane is 100 CS down, losing tower, and getting killed 2 vs 2. I can't remember any games like that for us. CoreJJ and I don't make many mechanical mistakes and I think we play a lot cleaner in general. -- Doublelift 2019

twitch chat

May 2019

Riot Games

League of Legends

Mr. K-Kripp, I charted your win rate for the last month

twitchquotes: monkaS

📉 Um.... Mr. K-Kripp, I charted your win rate for the last month...

twitch chat

June 2017

Kripp

[Copypasta] Do NOT meet Robert Downey Jr. in real life!

Mesothelioma ad script

If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

Gru and Spongebob fanfic

Spongebob

NSFW

Doublelift: I don't make many mechanical mistakes

League of Legends

Mr. K-Kripp, I charted your win rate for the last month

Hearthstone

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