[Copypasta] You. Me. Gas station

You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

xqc 6 consoles

twitchquotes: Analyser, fucking moderator stance, sound filter, 6 monitors, pedals, drums, a gaming guitar, controller, 6 CONSOLES, 10 computers, BUNCH OF FUCKING WIRES, SOUNDPADS, SPEAKERS, ANTENA, SATELLITE, DOG, DOG CAM, CAT CAM, CAT TREE CAT THIS, and a bunch of dogshit dude, able to analyse NASAs landing speeds dude.
twitch chat
December 2020
xQcOW

8th year without variety

๐Ÿ“œ โœ Sadge ๐“œ๐”‚ ๐“ญ๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ฎ๐“ผ๐“ฝ ๐“ซ๐“ป๐“ธ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ๐“ป, ๐“ฝ๐“ธ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ถ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ด๐“ผ ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ 8๐“ฝ๐“ฑ ๐”‚๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ป ๐”€๐“ฎ ๐“ฑ๐“ช๐“ฟ๐“ฎ ๐“ฑ๐“ช๐“ญ ๐”€๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ฝ ๐“ฟ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ฒ๐“ฎ๐“ฝ๐”‚. ๐“ฆ๐“ฎ ๐“ถ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ท๐“ธ๐“ฝ ๐“ซ๐“ฎ ๐“ช๐“ซ๐“ต๐“ฎ ๐“ฝ๐“ธ ๐“ฎ๐“ท๐“ญ๐“พ๐“ป๐“ฎ. ๐“Ÿ๐“ต๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ผ๐“ฎ ๐“น๐“ป๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ฏ๐“ธ๐“ป ๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ป ๐“ผ๐“ช๐“ต๐“ฟ๐“ช๐“ฝ๐“ฒ๐“ธ๐“ท. .
February 2021
Forsen

Hello! My name is Reynad!

twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

No one this year has a chance against TL

twitchquotes: Hate to break it to you, but no one this year has a chance against TL. They are easily the best team in the world this year, and its easy to see why. You have Impact, former world champion and the tank god ready to reclaim his title, and there is nothing that will stand in his way. Xmithie, the legendary jungle who knows the ins and outs of every single part of the game, ask him how much damage krugs will do to Anivia jungle at level 2 with just the starting item? He knows. Ask him where Mlxg will be at 20:43 into the game when its only 10:12? He can give you an area accurate to withing 500 units. You have Jensen, easily clapping perkz, caps, and your mum, as well as dominating the inferior Chinese and Korean mids. You have Doublelift, so called because he can carry twice as hard as any other ADC in the game, backed up by CoreJJ, a world champion who is so accurate with his Thresh hooks Riot had to program in a random number generator just to make sure he misses at least 20% of them to keep it fair to the enemy. Anyone who thinks EU, China, Korea, or any other team has a chance this year is straight up wrong.
twitch chat
August 2019

League of Legends

Trolling my whole class with Among Us Part 2

So yesterday at lunch, I was about to eat with my friends from band when I realized that there was an empty seat at a table with some of the popular kids. I decided to take advantage of this opportunity to troll them, and perhaps befriend some of them. I sat at their table, and right as I sat down, I noticed that one of the kids (who happened to be black) was sitting above a vent. I yelled "Black is sus! He's on top of a vent!!" Everyone at the table looked up at me, but no one laughed (they probably didn't get the reference). I decided that I would try to get them to be familiar with it, so I asked "Do to guys wanna play some Among Us???" They were all dead silent (honestly they just didn't know how fun of a game it was). I slapped the middle of our table (to mimick the "emergency meeting" feature in Among Us), and I screamed "EMERGENCY MEETING!!!" Again, none of them laughed. One of them looked at me and said "Can you please sit somewhere else?" At this point, I realized that I had to make them laugh quickly, or I would blow my chance with them. I made the widest grin I could possibly make (Trying to mimick the "When the imposter is sus" meme) and I said "When the impoter is sus". I then tried to make a face that resembled the "Flushed" emoji (as part of the meme). However, I don't think any of them understood the reference. I then pulled up the among us theme song on Youtube and played it on full blast. At this point, everyone at my table was asking for me to leave, and their friend came back, who regularly sat in the chair I was sitting in. I went back to sit with my friends from band. However, I will forever remember the time I trolled ALL of the popular kids in my grade.
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

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