[Copypasta] You. Me. Gas station

You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Imaqtpie has mastered Kog'Maw's passive

twitchquotes: Hi Imaqtpie, this is David 'Repertoir' Capurro, the lead designer on Kog'Maw back in 2010. Watching you play my champion really warms my heart, and I think you're one of the good guys. You've even mastered his passive!
twitch chat
March 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

BAIR, FAIR, Up AIR, DAIR

twitchquotes: BAIR, FAIR, Up AIR, DAIR. Long ago, the four aerials lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when MKLeo picked Ike and spammed NAIR. Only the Tweek, master of all four aerials, could stop him, but when the world needed him most, he vanished.
twitch chat
February 2019

Super Smash Bros

Football

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣤⣤⡀⠀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣷⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠈⠻⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠻⡦⠈⠻⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠙⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡉⠻⠂⡀⠺⣦⣼⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣧⡈⠋⣠⡈⢻⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⡟⠻⡦⠈⠠⣦⣈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣄⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠺⣦⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣦⡀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⢿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠀⠈⠛⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
October 2021

Inferno and cobblestone chickens

twitchquotes: I think inferno and cobblestone need to go. In these maps chickens are killed recklessly and without remorse. Chat keeps shouting 'PETA' but no action is taken. I think we need to take them out of the competitive map pool to put a stop to this slaughter and show we are serious.
twitch chat
April 2016
Summt1g

CSGO

STFU

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August 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing