[Copypasta] You. Me. Gas station

You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA
June 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Artosis is glad Kripp is joining the way of the sellout

twitchquotes: WELL MET KRIPP, IT'S ME ARTOSIS. I'M GLAD YOU'RE JOINING THE WAY OF THE SELLOUT.
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

boo every1 im Gohst!!!

twitchquotes: boo every1 im Gohst!!!!!!! holds up ecto-spork my name is spooky but u can call me t3h GoHST P3ngin3 oF sp00kyness!!!!!!!! b00!…as u can see (0r cant iM inVIsible) im very Sp00key!!!! thats why iM came here, 2 HauNT random ppl like you! _… im 13,000 years old (im S00key 4 my age doe) i like 2 bee Sp00key like Salad F1ng3rs w/ my GirlGHostFr1nd (im bi-ectoplasmic if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite Way 2 Sp00k!!! bcuz its SOOOO Creepy!!!! shes sp00kEY 2 of course s0 w3 want 2 HaunT random ppl =) like they say the more GohSTS the sP00OkYER!!!! lol…neways i hope 2 make Y0U ScarED so give me lots of wAYS 2 Sp00k U out!!!!!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

I once knew this man. He was from the ocean

twitchquotes: I once knew this man. He was from the ocean. He did very Ocean-y things. He took me by the hand to take me to the land that you understand. He was the crust of a tan man imbibed by the sand, Soaking up the thirst of the land. Soaking up the thirst of the land. His Shin was in the shape of an "O". Don't know what to call him though...any ideas?
twitch chat
June 2017

I'm honestly considering uninstalling PUBG on PC

twitchquotes: (sponsored message) WOW! I love the way this game looks. The graphics are great and the framerate is perfect! I'm honestly considering uninstalling PUBG on PC and just moving over to mobile because this seems like the far superior product. Thank you Kripp for showing me this amazing new game.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

sellout

PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds

Gonna go against the grain here and say YTA

Gonna go against the grain here and say YTA. Honestly, what the fuck is wrong with you? I simply can’t fucking believe that you would make such an idiotic decision. You’re a disgusting little crawly lobotomite and you deserve to perish in a dark deep abyss where you belong. I’ve gone ahead and removed one reddit upvote from your account by “downvoting” this comment. I hope you rethink your actions in the future. Fuck you.
August 2021

Am I The Asshole?

Text-to-Speech Playing