[Copypasta] You. Me. Gas station

You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA
June 2021
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More Copypastas

are you a "girl"?? A "female?" A "member of the finer sex?"

Excuse me sir or ma'am but I couldn't help but notice.... are you a "girl"?? A "female?" A "member of the finer sex?" Not that it matters too much, but it's just so rare to see a girl around here! I don't mind, no--quite to the contrary! It's so refreshing to see a girl online, to the point where I'm always telling all my friends "I really wish girls were better represented on the internet." And here you are! I don't mean to push or anything, but if you wanted to DM me about anything at all, I'd love to pick your brain and learn all there is to know about you. I'm sure you're an incredibly interesting girl--though I see you as just a person, really--and I think we could have lots to teach each other. I've always wanted the chance to talk to a gorgeous lady--and I'm pretty sure you've got to be gorgeous based on the position of your text in the picture--so feel free to shoot me a message, any time at all! You don't have to be shy about it, because you're beautiful anyways (that's juyst a preview of all the compliments I have in store for our chat). Looking forwards to speaking with you soon, princess! EDIT: I couldn't help but notice you haven't sent your message yet. There's no need to be nervous! I promise I don't bite, haha EDIT 2: In case you couldn't find it, you can click the little chat button from my profile and we can get talking ASAP. Not that I don't think you could find it, but just in case hahah EDIT 3: look I don't understand why you're not even talking to me, is it something I said? EDIT 4: I knew you were always a bitch, but I thought I was wrong. I thought you weren't like all the other girls out there but maybe I was too quick to judge EDIT 5: don't ever contact me again whore EDIT 6: hey are you there?
September 2021

Simps

mizkifSmile

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⣶⣶⣶⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⡿⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣆⣀⣼⣿⡟⠁⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠉⠙⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣷⣆⠄⠐⠄⣄⣠⡄⣠⣤⡄⣴⣦⣀⣤⣠⣴⢰⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⠈⣈⠃⠻⢿⡷⣿⣿⠿⠋⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠄⠈⠙⠾⠿⢿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠋⠁⢀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣋⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣝⣛⡋⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠿⣛⣭⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄
November 2021

Only the chosen one can fist both asses

twitchquotes: (‿ˠ‿) _(‿ˠ‿) only the chosen one can fist both asses. ⎝ Kreygasm
twitch chat
June 2016

100 Thieves Team visited an LA orphanage

twitchquotes: In their upcoming heist, The 100 Thieves Team visited an orphanage in LA. "It's heartbreaking to see their sad little faces with no hope", said Charlie, age 6.
twitch chat
March 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

My son got kicked out of school

twitchquotes: My son got kicked out of school for letting a girl jerk him off in class. That's three schools now. Maybe teaching isn't for him. FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
August 2017
Text-to-Speech Playing