[Copypasta] You. Me. Gas station

You. Me. Gas station. What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh! There was a roofie in our gas station sushi. We black out and wake up in a sewer surrounded by fish. Horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy. The stench draws in a bear. What do we do? We're gonna fight it. Bear fight. Bare handed. Bare, naked? Oh, yes please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl and ride it into a Chuck E. Cheese. Dance Dance Revolution. Revolution? Overthrow the government? Uh, I think so. Next thing you know, I'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then I turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out, which I didn't even know you could do. Then I smoked a joint, greened out. Then I turn into the sun. Uh oh! Looks like the meth is kicking in. aklfhaofhasfahfakh AAAAAAAAA afahfioahflkf AAAAA
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

First, some perspective. I'm a PURIFY-PRIEST player

twitchquotes: First, some perspective. I'm a PURIFY-PRIEST player. If you don't know what that is, it's not important, just know it's a deck I'm very passionate about and that I've played for three years now. That's right, I've played the same deck for the years, and it's never gotten stale. Why? Because the enjoyment comes from mastering the deck, from fine tuning my decision making, my sequencing, from learning how to play around the latest and greatest shenanigans.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp likes his relationships the way he likes games, casual

twitchquotes: 'Pls,' says the Rania, begging Kripp to propose to her. 'My family will be forevr shamed if we no marry.' But the Kripparrian doesn't respond. Instead, he continues playing hearth of stone, the game of casuals. He is too afraid of commitment in a hardcore relationship. Because in the end, the Kripparrian likes his relationships the way he likes his games—casual.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Starege

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠻⠛⠉⠉⠛⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⣠⡶⢶⣶⣄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣶⣶⣄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⣿⡇⢀⢻⣿⣷⡀⢰⣿⣿⠁⠈⣿⡇⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠟⢁⣀⣀⣀⡀⢿⡇⠘⣸⣿⣿⠁⢿⣿⣿⡘⠄⣿⠇⣀⣀⣀⣀⡉⠻⣿ ⡿⢃⣵⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⠈⠻⠿⣿⠿⢋⣄⡜⠿⣿⣿⡾⠋⢠⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡈ ⢁⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣧⡈⠓⠄⠄⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠚⢁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣾⡿⢁⢶⣦⡈⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⡿⢋⣭⡍⠙⣿⣿ ⣿⠃⣾⣄⠻⣿⣦⣈⡛⠻⠿⢿⠿⢿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠛⣁⣴⣿⠏⣡⠄⢿⣿ ⠙⠂⠙⣿⣷⣄⡙⠛⠻⠿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⡶⠿⠿⠛⢋⣠⣾⡟⠄⠚⠛ ⣶⣤⡀⠄⠙⠻⠿⢷⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⢤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣾⠿⠟⠋⠄⠄⢀⣠ ⠟⣛⣩⣴⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠈⠈⠉⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣐⣛⣻ ⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2021

Pepe

Troll Face 2

░░░░▄▄▄▄▄▓▓▓▄▄▄░░░░░ ░░░░▄▄▓▀▀▀▀▀▀▓▓▓▓▓▓▄░░░ ░░▄▄▓▀▀░░░░░░░▒▒▒▒▒▀▓▄░ ░▐▓▓▌░░░░░░░░░░░░▒▒▒▒▓▌ ░▐▓▒░░▄▒▒▓▄▄▒▒▒░▒▄▄▄▒▒▓ ░▓▓▌░░░░░▒▒▒▒▀▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓ ░▐▓░░░░▒▒▓(◐)▓░░░▒▓▓(◐)▒▓ █░▀▄░█▄█▀▄▄░▀░▀▄▄▀░░█░█ ░█░░░▀▄█▄█░█▀▄▄▄▄▄▀██░█ ░░█░░░░█░███▄█▄█▄███░░█ ░░░█░░░▀▀█░█▀█▀█▀███░█ ░░░░▀▄░░░░▀▀▄█▄█▄█▄▀░█ ░░░░░░▀▄▄░▒▒▒░░░░░░░░░█ ░░░░░░░░░▀▀▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▀
September 2016

Hello there, Octavian! This is Kurt McGriff

twitchquotes: Hello there, Octavian! This is Kurt McGriff, executive producer for the Food Channel. We have reviewed your recent application to be a host of your own TV show on our network titled, "Salty Vegan Eats - A Pro Gamer's Way of Life" However, after further reviewing your claim of being an "extremely popular professional gamer" we found the evidence lacking. Mr. Octavian, casually playing a children's card game does not make you a "pro gamer." Have a nice day and good luck to your future endeavors.
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

salty

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