[Copypasta] My eyes are open

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ʘ̚ل͜ʘ̚༽ノ MY EYES, ARE OPEN ヽ༼ʘ̚ل͜ʘ̚༽ノ
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Kripp Copypastas

Popsicle burglaries

twitchquotes: Local police are baffled by a string of strange popsicle burglaries that have taken place over the past few days. The thief appears to be ignoring cash, jewelry, and other valuables, only taking sugary treats from the residents' freezers. Police have yet to apprehend the burglar, but have several reports of a suspicious lanky figure with poor hygiene seen near the crime scenes muttering about "value." Any further information on the popsicle bandit should be reported immediately.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

Stream snipers

twitchquotes: One day, the Papa asks Kripp to go fishing, Kripp shrugs, “Alright, but catch and release only – I’m vegan.” They arrive at the local pristine clear waters of an Ontario stream brimming with wild trout and prepare to fish. Suddenly Kripp shouts, “Get down!”. A crack sounds through the air, and the Papa sees Kripp on the ground bleeding. His final words are, “Fucking stream snipers.”
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Maximus Kappacus Spamicus, commander of the Twitch Armies

twitchquotes: <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ My name is Maximus Kappacus Spamicus, commander of the Armies of the Twitch, General of the PJSalt Legions, loyal servant to the true Emperor Kripparrian. Father to a banned son, and husband to a banned wife. I will slay all moderinos, whether in this chat or the next. <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

MODS

salty

Salt season pass

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Don salteroni from Sodium enterprises, we would like to remind you to renew your season pass as soon as possible if you would like to continue receiving daily shipments of table salt, best regards Don salteroni. pls no PJSalt
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Hello Kripp, Deathgarden developer here

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, Deathgarden developer here. I finally see that you got your vegan bitch ass to work. Remember, you're forced by contract to show off this game in all its splendor. And not only I'm paying you with a fuckton of money, but you also might get your wife back soon enough. So you better start getting some kills and play decently, or you will have to say goodbye to your midget dog. Happy gaming.
twitch chat
June 2019
Kripp

sellout

Text-to-Speech Playing