[Copypasta] Dear women who post nudes on reddit.

Stop with the fucking " I bet you'll never guess what's under my dress.." It's tits. It's always fucking tits. This is no mystery to anyone, and human anatomy has been the same for over 100k years. Seriously, shut the fuck up. You all do this. Do you really think your tits and asshole are so special that they're going to shift our collective consciousness or something? "I bet the guys at the gym wonder what's under my yoga pants." I bet they already know, and if they fucking don't, maybe you shouldn't be at a kid gym for 4 year olds.
July 2021
I used to be a real ad
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September 2020

Rania's a DongDigger

twitchquotes: [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲̅)̲̅$̲̅] I ain't saying Rania's a DongDigger, but she ain't messin with no broke krippers [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲̅)̲̅$̲̅]
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Kermit the Frog and the Twin Towers

It is actual Muppets canon that Kermit the Frog, in some way, had a role in bringing down the Twin Towers in the terror attacks of September 11, 2001. In "It's a Very Muppets Christmas Movie," a film released in late 2002, Kermit is shown a glimpse of what New York City might look like if he had never been born. Among the scenery of this alternate reality NYC, we find none other than the Twin Towers proudly standing in the background. They were, of course, long destroyed in Kermit's normal reality. And yet, in the world without Kermit, the war on terror is missing its powder keg spark. Who would've thought that green piece of fuck could kermit a terror attack on US soil, but there it stands unimpeachable... We have concrete, canon proof of involvement. Why the world hasn't stopped and asked further questions is only further proof of a media cabal keeping this conversation away from the masses. The Twin Towers would still be standing if it weren't for Kermit the Frog. Al Qaeda was the puppet this time, and Kermit the hand within.
April 2022

Kripp's sonnerino

twitchquotes: Kʀɪᴘᴘ, ɪᴛ's ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴏɴɴᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ғᴜᴛᴜʀᴇ, ᴄᴏɴᴄᴇɪᴠᴇᴅ ɪɴ Gʀᴇᴇᴄᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ Tʀᴜᴍᴘ's ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs ᴛᴏᴜᴄʜᴇᴅ. Yᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴛʀᴀᴄᴛᴇᴅ ᴀ ʜɪɢʜʟʏ ʟᴇɢᴀʟ ғᴏʀᴍ ᴏғ ᴀɪᴅs ᴛʜᴀᴛ sᴏᴏɴ ɪɴғᴇᴄᴛ ᴇᴀʀᴛʜᴇʀɪɴᴏ. Tʜᴇ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴄᴜʀᴇ ɪs ᴀ ᴘʜᴇʀᴏᴍᴏɴᴇ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛᴇᴅ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴏɴʟʏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴋɴᴇᴇ. Pᴀᴘᴀ, ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴜsᴛ ʟɪᴄᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴋɴᴇᴇ! Pʟs ɴᴏ ғᴇᴛᴛᴜᴄᴄɪɴᴏ ᴀʟғᴀ ʀᴏᴍᴇᴏ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

im gigalooted

twitchquotes: qtpDANCE on me qtpDANCE hes one hit qtpDANCE hes lit qtpDANCE hes no armor qtpDANCE im fucking running qtpDANCE im dead as fuck qtpDANCE im far as fuck from you guys qtpDANCE im gigalooted qtpDANCE
twitch chat
August 2019
imaqtpie
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