Stop with the fucking " I bet you'll never guess what's under my dress.."
It's tits. It's always fucking tits.
This is no mystery to anyone, and human anatomy has been the same for over 100k years. Seriously, shut the fuck up. You all do this. Do you really think your tits and asshole are so special that they're going to shift our collective consciousness or something?
"I bet the guys at the gym wonder what's under my yoga pants."
I bet they already know, and if they fucking don't, maybe you shouldn't be at a kid gym for 4 year olds.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Dat Boi isn't so great?
twitchquotes:
Dat Boi isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a meme with such hilarity and re-usability online? Dat Boi puts the memes in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a meme of it's caliber and passion for the memes again. Pepe breaks records. Le toucan breaks records. Dat boi breaks the rules. You can keep your copypastas. I prefer the frog
twitch chat
Papparrian is disappointed in Kripparrian
twitchquotes:
Ｋｒｉｐｐ， ｔｈｉｓ ｉｓ Ｐａｐｐａｒｒｉａｎ． ＷＨＡＴ ＴＨＥ ＦＵＣＫ？ Ｗｈｙ ａｒｅ ｙｏｕ ｐｌａｙｉｎｇ ａ ＭＯＢＡ？ Ｉ ｒｅｍｅｍｂｅｒ ｗｈｅｎ ｙｏｕ ｗｅｒｅ ａ ｙｏｕｎｇ ｂｏｙ ａｎｄ ｙｏｕ ｗｏｕｌｄｎ＇ｔ ｄａｒｅ ｔｏｕｃｈ ｔｈａｔ ｓｈｉｔ． Ｉ＇ｍ ｄｉｓｓａｐｏｉｎｔｅｄ ｉｎ ｙｏｕ ｓｏｎ． Ｒｉｐ ｉｎ ｐｅｐｐｅｒｏｎｉｓ
twitch chat
Kripp
my brother is the best cook
twitchquotes:
my😽 brother 👱 is the best🥇cook 🧑🍳because 🗣with 2️⃣ eggs🥚🥚1️⃣sausage🌭and a cup🥛of milk🍼he👱can fill⬆️my👩tummy🤰for9️⃣🗣months📅🥰🤩
twitch chat
Emoji Pasta
Greggnog
First off: I am not joking. I wish I was joking.
I've been with my wonderful boyfriend Greg for over 4 years now, and this Christmas was our third spent together. He's so much fun to be around, handsome, charming, and our sex life is great. Except for one small problem.
Every year now starting in December he starts referring to his cum as "Greggnog." When I first heard him say this, it was in the context of a joke, so I laughed, and then I forgot about it. A few days after this, we're exchanging some spicy texts before he gets home from work he says to me, in all seriousness, "I can't wait to pour Greggnog all over your face." I could not believe he just said that to me, but I didn't know what else to do at the time but go along with it.
Fast forward to this December. This phrase re-enters his vocabulary at the same time every year. It makes me cringe beyond belief, but until this year he used it sparingly enough for me to just be able to laugh and say "shut the fuck up."
I'm sure that 2020 has done at least some irreparable psychic damage to all people, but unfortunately, for my boyfriend, this has manifested in the form of him referring to his cum as "Greggnog" non-stop. This month he has been using the term almost exclusively, in all contexts, and it is driving me batshit insane. I sat him down to talk last week, and I asked him very clearly and directly to stop. At the time, he said he would, and it did slow down for a few days, but it is now four days after Christmas and he's back at it again with no end in sight.
He absolutely means the world to me, and I saw myself spending the rest of my life with him, but I have serious doubts now whether or not I can if every Christmas is going to be like this. So please, reddit, what do I do to make this stop for good?
Classic
Jokerd I can do whatever I want
twitchquotes:
Who do I think I am? Let me tell you who I am. I am world first level 60 in fucking classic wow. I can do whatever the fuck I want. You think I'm a random player? You think I'm a fucking random player? Let me fucking clue you in bitch. I am the the guy who had 350 fucking thousand viewers playing this fucking game. Me, not you. The most views ever on this game. The first guy to hit 60. I can do whatever the fuck I want.
twitch chat
JokerdTV