[Copypasta] Dear women who post nudes on reddit.

Stop with the fucking " I bet you'll never guess what's under my dress.." It's tits. It's always fucking tits. This is no mystery to anyone, and human anatomy has been the same for over 100k years. Seriously, shut the fuck up. You all do this. Do you really think your tits and asshole are so special that they're going to shift our collective consciousness or something? "I bet the guys at the gym wonder what's under my yoga pants." I bet they already know, and if they fucking don't, maybe you shouldn't be at a kid gym for 4 year olds.
July 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Macaiyla left long ago...

twitchquotes: The year is 2050, league is played by less than 100 people. T1 has finally reached Masters, "Macaiyla I did it!" he yells excitedly. The sound echoes through the empty trailer. Macaiyla left long ago...
twitch chat
April 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

This player doesn't even use a monitor

I've seen [insert player here] play, he doesn't even use a monitor. He visualizes the map in a detailed rendering, completely in his mind. He has a biological wallhack; his godlike perception highlights all enemies within light-years. His eyes are closed as his mouse gracefully swerves across the table, making immaculate twitches as he flicks from head to head. The bullets that escape his gun barrel are surgical; each making a deadly strike in between his opponent's eyes.
July 2022

CSGO

Valorant

I’ve been wondering if I might be a gay

Recently, I’ve been wondering if I might be a gay. It all started a week ago. I was sitting on the toilet, pooping, when all of a sudden, a big shit turd comes out of my ass. It was huge. Big big. It’s so fucking big, I gotta look down into the toilet to check for blood. No blood, but the turd is fucking massive. I notice something strange about it. The end of the turd, sticking out of the water, looks like a dick head. A penis head. Needless to say, I was concerned. How could this be? I picked it up from the water, and put it back up my ass. To my surprise, it felt good. I then shit it back into the water. Splash. I then repeated this a few more times, moaning out β€œOscar Winning actor Anthony Hopkins” each time. I am not sure if I am now gay. My boyfriend says it’s completely normal, but he’s gay, so I can’t trust him.
May 2021

boatyVV

β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β”€ β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β”€β”€β”€β–„β”€β–€β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–—β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–›β”€β”€ β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ ──────▄▀────────▓─────── β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–“β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–„ β”€β–„β–„β”€β–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–›β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–ˆ β”€β–ˆβ”€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–€β”€ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–„β–€β”€β”€β”€ ───▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀──────
September 2018

This person...

twitchquotes: πŸ‘† gachiBASS this person fucked this person in the ass πŸ‘‡ gachiBASS
twitch chat
August 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing