I just lost my virginity and said Poggers
Ok so we were flirting and he took of his pants and started to rub his bulge then he pulls his dick out, I dead ass said “ that’s pretty pog” he then broke up with me after we were done 💀
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Evere Time Kripe Bro Fist I Put Balls On Compotur Scren
twitchquotes:
Ｅｖｅｒｅ Ｔｉｍ Ｋｒｉｐｅ Ｂｒｏ Ｆｉｓｔ Ｉ Ｐｕｔ Ｂａｌｌｓ Ｏｎ Ｃｏｍｐｏｔｕｒ Ｓｃｒｅｎ． Ｍａｅｋ Ｋｒｉｐｅ Ｌｏｏｋ Ｇａｙ Ｈａｈａ Ｋｒｉｐｅ Ｔｏｕｃｈｂａｌｌｓ
twitch chat
Kripp
How I got into Harvard
Many people always ask me how I was able to get into Harvard as a 16 year old who skipped 3 grades of high school. They think I got in because of my scholarly records, but no the key is the interview.
As I sat in the Harvard Dean's office in front of the board of reviewers for my application, the Dean asks me "Why should you be a good candidate for this school?" They seemed bored but I replied "Well I was born a child prodigy, placed 1st in my state spelling bee for three consecutive years, I can speak eight different languages not counting Latin, play four different instruments, I skipped grades 4 through 6, and graduated my high school as valedictorian at the age of 14. I then worked as an intern at both Telsa, and NASA." Suddenly the room burst into laughter and many of board instantly started scribbling down "No" near the application check marks. The Dean says "Sorry but you are just not the type we are looking for." But then I said "Excuse me but I wasn't finished... I watch Rick and Morty" The Dean looked at me like an idiot and said "So....?" Then I replied with a smile "And I understand all the references and subtle jokes" An audible gasp let out by the board was so loud the secretary had to come in. You could hear a pin drop and then suddenly all at once the entire board clicked their pens on the "Approved Box" and I was instantly handed a diploma and now I'm teaching advanced physicals there. I guess you can say I'm pretty smart. 
Rick and Morty
Salt season pass
twitchquotes:
Kripp, this is Don salteroni from Sodium enterprises, we would like to remind you to renew your season pass as soon as possible if you would like to continue receiving daily shipments of table salt, best regards Don salteroni. pls no 
twitch chat
Kripp
Did you ever hear the tragedy of xQc?
twitchquotes:
Did you ever hear the tragedy of xQc? I thought not. It's not a story the OWL casters would tell you. It's a tank legend. xQc was a tank main, so powerful and so wise he could use his shield to influence the DPS to do their jobs.. He had such a knowledge of the shields that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The tank mains of the game is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful... the only thing he was afraid of was getting banned for toxicity, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice reported him to blizzard in his sleep. It's ironic he could save others from death, but not himself.
twitch chat
xQcOW
Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise
Overwatch
This is the 12-0 Police, you're coming with... nevermind
twitchquotes:
(̿·̿Ĺ̯·̿ ̿) This is the 12-0 Police, you're coming with ... Nevermind wrong person. (·̿Ĺ̯·̿ ̿)
twitch chat
Trump