[Copypasta] Horny during Space Jam 2

OK so I was watching space jam 2 and I got RANDOMLY horny. I didn’t wanna exit the movie so I just waited till the Lola scene came up. It came. I started JACKING the SHIT out my pecker. And then.. I ACCIDENTLY NUTTED TO LEBRON😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
July 2021
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I sexually Identify as an LGM-30 Minuteman III

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as an LGM-30 Minuteman III intercontinental ballistic missile. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of delivering a W78 nuclear warhead with an explosive yield of 3x500 kilotons of TNT anywhere on the planet at Mach 23. People say to me that a person being a Minuteman III is impossible and I’m ο»Ώincredibly destructive but I don’t care. I’m having Air Force Global Strike Command install new three-stage solid-fuel rocket engines and give me an $86 billion upgrade on my 59 foot body. From now on I want you guys to call me "ICBM" and respect my right to be in service until at least the 2030s. If you can’t accept me you’re missileophobe and need to check your local AFB for missile silos. Thank you, and I'll see you in WW3.
twitch chat
May 2017

I sexually Identify as

Moon emoji blob

πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŽ©πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸ‘πŸŒ‘πŸ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸ‘„πŸŒ‘πŸŒ”πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŽ€πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ”πŸ†πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ• πŸŒ•πŸ‘ πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸ‘ πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•
February 2021

Classic

I fucked the impostor from the hitgame Among Us in my dreams

I fucked the impostor from the hitgame Among Us in my dreams. He was very sus. I can’t stop thinking about his big red schlong destroying my anus until it’s as red as the impostor from the hitgame Among Us. I hope I can ever meet him. I would stroke his chest, give him a big slap on his butt that was hidden behind that hot latex astronaut suit. I want him in my ass, I want him to fill my twitching butthole with everything he got. This is how my wet dreams end every single day, I can’t stop thinking about the impostor of the hitgame Among Us.
May 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Ah shit, here we go again.

β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β£€β£€β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ÿβ €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β »β£Ώβ£·β£„β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£΄β£Άβ£Ώβ‘†β €β €β ‰β ‰β €β ˆβ£Άβ‘†β € ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⒠⣿⣿⣿⑇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Ⓕ⣷⠀ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Όβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ Ÿβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Έβ£Ώβ‘„ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ ƒβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ™β£Ώβ£· β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β ›β ƒβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’°β£Ύβ£Ώβ  β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’ β£§β‘”β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β Ÿβ β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’Έβ£Ώβ ‡β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € Ah shit, here we go again.
July 2019

Twilight Sparkle

β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–’β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ ▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░░░░░░▐▄░▓▓▓▓▓▓ β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“
November 2014
Text-to-Speech Playing