[Copypasta] I hate you

Mark, let me tell you something. Pay close attention to the text that I am about to write. An average human body has about 38 trillion cells. In each of these cells there is a spiral helix of DNA that, if stretched to its maximum, is about two meters long. DNA is one of the densest stores of information on the planet: a single gram of DNA stores about 700 terabytes of information. If we stretched out the 76 trillion meters of DNA in my body and recorded, character by character, the word "Hate" over and over and over again, this pile of information could not store the tiniest fraction of a trillionth of the hatred that I feel for you right now. Every drop of blood in my body cries out for your death. My very soul writhes in disgust. Your mere existence is a blasphemy and an affront to every possible virtue and quality that any rational being can possess. You are a deception to Satan himself.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

You don't let Perfect World organize next time

twitchquotes: BrokeBack You are running Dota 2 Major. You let Perfect World organize because you think they can do it. Perfect World instantly shit on Shanghai major. Everyone lose their shit. You don't let Perfect World organize next time because you're not stupid. BrokeBack
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February 2016
Dota Major

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Bees fly anyway bUrself

twitchquotes: bUrself According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don’t care what humans think is impossible. bUrself
twitch chat
April 2016

Alester Crowley

⡕⡧⡏⣞⢵⡣⣳⣕⢞⢮⡺⣕⡳⣵⣫⢷⠋⣠⣤⣂⠬⡓⢬⠢⣣⣿⢫⣶⡽⣿⡡⣋⢞⡡⣚⠤⠂⣀⠉⠚⡮⣳⣱⢭⡫⣫⡺⣜⢎⡞⡼⡽⡽⣝⠮ ⣣⢯⣺⡪⡷⣝⢮⢞⡽⣕⢯⣺⢮⠗⠋⠄⢀⢐⣒⡨⠝⣚⢵⣹⡾⣱⣟⣟⡾⡞⣿⣵⣝⠪⢔⡚⠭⠅⠄⠄⠈⠓⣗⣗⡽⣕⡕⡗⡵⡝⡮⣫⢯⢷⢹ ⡯⣳⢵⢽⢝⣮⢯⢯⣞⣷⡿⠞⡁⠅⠐⡀⠂⠄⠤⠭⠭⠥⣽⢟⣼⡭⣭⡭⡽⣽⣮⢿⣮⡙⣒⣒⡛⠠⠈⡀⠂⡀⠄⠳⣯⢶⡹⣪⡪⣎⢯⢾⢽⣝⢜ ⡯⣯⣫⢯⣻⡼⣯⣟⣷⠛⡁⢂⠠⠈⢀⠄⠄⠂⠨⠭⢍⣽⣫⣾⣿⣿⣗⡽⣿⣞⣾⢷⡹⣯⡁⣒⠂⠐⢀⠂⠄⢂⢁⠄⡈⠻⣞⣧⢳⡣⣏⣯⣟⢮⡳ ⡯⣺⣪⢗⣗⣿⣻⠏⡁⠢⠐⠐⠠⢑⠡⠨⠐⠠⢚⣩⣿⣳⣻⣿⣽⣭⣯⣭⣧⣷⣟⣟⣟⣽⣷⡲⢬⠈⠄⠎⠨⠠⡠⢈⠄⠄⠈⠹⡷⣝⣞⣾⢽⣳⢕ ⣟⣞⢾⢽⣾⡿⠋⠐⠈⠄⢁⢐⠅⡣⠁⠡⠐⣈⡵⢋⠝⣩⢏⣚⡜⣜⣆⢽⢪⣎⢞⣌⢏⢯⠹⡻⣐⠊⠐⡈⠄⡁⠄⠂⠡⠈⠄⠄⠈⠻⣳⣿⣻⡽⣕ ⡵⣳⣟⣿⡽⠁⠈⠄⢄⠪⡐⢌⢊⡐⢌⠂⠜⡋⠄⠅⠊⡁⡁⠋⠎⣾⢸⢸⣸⢸⡌⠎⢃⠁⡓⠉⡊⠛⢆⢂⠃⠅⠡⠨⡐⠠⠐⠄⠄⠄⠙⢯⣷⣻⣜ ⣯⣻⣾⠏⠄⠄⡄⠕⢌⠊⡔⡢⠡⡊⠔⡡⠑⠌⠌⠌⠂⠐⠄⠁⠂⠁⠏⢺⠎⠊⠁⠐⠄⠂⠄⠡⠄⢑⠐⠠⠑⡁⠅⠨⠠⠁⠂⡀⠂⠄⠠⠈⢻⡷⣕ ⡷⣿⠃⠄⠄⠌⠄⡁⡂⠌⠂⠊⠈⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⢀⢀⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠈⠄⡀⠐⠄⢀⠁⠠⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠂⠠⠐⠄⠻⡵ ⣿⠇⠄⠄⡈⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣄⣖⣾⣾⣾⣾⣯⣷⣟⣾⣷⣷⣽⣼⢌⢆⢄⠂⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡻ ⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣤⣤⣠⣶⣶⡀⣀⣀⠄⢀⠮⡾⣫⣙⠙⠛⠻⢻⢿⠿⡻⣟⡟⠝⠜⠕⠉⠂⠅⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣄⣠⣶⣦⣀⡀⠄⢀⣴⡴⣝ ⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣺⣿⣿⡧⣿⣿⣷⣲⣵⡝⠉⢀⠁⠄⡀⠄⠈⣰⡬⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⡁⠑⠄⠄⢠⠆⣛⣉⣿⣿⣷⢺⣿⣿⡆⢿⣿⣿⢿⣝⢴ ⣿⡰⣶⡀⣀⣤⣼⣿⣿⡿⣾⣿⣿⣻⣻⣿⣟⢿⣿⣻⠘⣟⠧⠔⢗⢔⣗⣽⣿⠄⠄⠄⠧⠰⠋⠄⣤⣷⣵⣽⣯⣯⢿⣯⢟⡾⣿⣿⡃⢸⣟⡿⣏⠮⢘ ⣟⡏⣾⣇⢹⣿⣿⠽⢿⢿⢿⣟⡟⠷⠙⢝⠐⠅⢸⢨⠄⠘⢜⣘⣴⢿⢕⣿⣿⠅⠄⡇⡅⡃⡆⣰⣟⡗⡯⡫⡳⣻⠿⢙⠹⡽⡿⡓⠁⢺⣳⡟⣾⡧⢘ ⡯⡪⠾⡷⢨⣛⣷⢑⠡⡁⡙⡁⡂⡂⡈⡆⢕⠅⢪⠢⡁⡂⢙⣿⢏⢊⣗⣽⣿⡏⠄⠈⣿⠮⠄⣷⡳⣝⡞⡮⡣⣣⢱⠄⠅⠉⠄⠄⠄⠘⢋⢵⡿⡋⢂ ⣟⡦⣄⠈⢳⢫⢷⢱⢑⠌⡂⠐⠄⡑⡐⡘⠨⢈⠢⡑⡁⡂⠐⣝⠅⣴⡁⠙⠋⠄⠄⢀⠪⡑⠄⣿⣟⢎⢾⢙⢜⢅⢑⠄⠂⠁⠄⠄⠄⢀⠪⠃⢁⣔⢮ ⣪⢾⡽⡗⠄⠉⠊⠂⠌⠨⠄⠈⡐⡐⡀⢆⠑⢄⢁⠂⠄⠄⢈⢮⣺⡺⣿⣗⢤⠠⠐⠄⢌⢂⠄⢻⣝⢎⢎⢌⠢⡑⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠠⠈⠘⢗⣕ ⣣⡷⠋⠄⠄⠠⠄⠠⠄⠄⠄⢔⢄⢄⢣⢑⠄⡢⣪⠪⡠⠁⢰⢻⠘⠘⡙⠉⠚⠉⠄⠐⠈⠠⠄⢸⣪⡷⣕⢔⠕⢌⠄⢀⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠈⢲ ⡗⠃⠄⠐⠄⠠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⡱⣳⣗⣵⣵⣿⣮⡧⠣⠄⠊⡆⡮⢯⠛⠙⠉⠙⠈⠄⠐⠄⠄⢰⡳⡻⣟⢼⢜⢔⢕⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠐⠈⠄⠄ ⠁⠄⠠⠁⢈⠄⠄⠂⢀⠠⠄⢸⣿⣿⣽⣿⣯⣿⣿⢇⢯⡂⠄⡣⣪⣾⣼⣾⣿⢶⣒⠤⡁⠄⠄⣽⣯⢯⢯⣳⢝⡕⡇⡕⡠⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠂⠄⠠⠄⠄
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I think my child might be british

I think my child might be british. Where did I go wrong in all of this??? What steps can I take to save him? I noticed it back in July when he seemed grumpy for our fourth of july picnic. Since then, he's been steadily getting a south L*ndon accent, drinking tea, and watching soccer. The other day I heard him call one of his friends "bruv" on the phone (which he now calls the TELLY for fucks sake!) WHAT DO I DO???
March 2021

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Fluttershy

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November 2014
Text-to-Speech Playing