[Copypasta] I hate you

Mark, let me tell you something. Pay close attention to the text that I am about to write. An average human body has about 38 trillion cells. In each of these cells there is a spiral helix of DNA that, if stretched to its maximum, is about two meters long. DNA is one of the densest stores of information on the planet: a single gram of DNA stores about 700 terabytes of information. If we stretched out the 76 trillion meters of DNA in my body and recorded, character by character, the word "Hate" over and over and over again, this pile of information could not store the tiniest fraction of a trillionth of the hatred that I feel for you right now. Every drop of blood in my body cries out for your death. My very soul writhes in disgust. Your mere existence is a blasphemy and an affront to every possible virtue and quality that any rational being can possess. You are a deception to Satan himself.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

British "person" (๐Ÿคข) in Godzilla vs Kong

I can't believe it, one of this year's biggest movies and they added a bri'ish "person", it's a well known fact by now that the so called "British" and the entire country of "Britain" aren't even real things. Why would the director decide to ruin the realism, the immersion his audience should feel when watching a huge monke and lizard fighting, by adding one of these imaginary "individuals". I must admit I was excited for Gozdilla vs Kong when I first saw the trailer but now... I don't know what to feel. I don't know if I have the will to watch this movie and be able to enjoy it while there's a bri'ish person on my screen.
April 2021

British People

Hello Moonman or whatever your name is

twitchquotes: Hello Moonman or whatever your name is, I just wanted to tell you to please stop ruining my chat experience with these "smugs" and "smegs" and what not. Honestly, I find them absolutely infuriating to see in every chatroom I stumble upon. Fuck that dumb purple lady.
twitch chat
June 2017
MOONMOON

we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce

gf is prego we like to get kinky anyways one night things get particularly saucy i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering ohshitohshitohshitohshit i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital she's still bleeding everywhere by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything he takes one look at ther and says "sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do" "WHY THE FUCK NOT???" "we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
February 2021

Classic

MUST BE EU

twitchquotes: SeemsGood NO LOGIC SeemsGood DOESNT UNDERSTAND IMMIGRATION SeemsGood WATCHING NA GAME SeemsGood ON NA WEBSITE SeemsGood MUST BE EU SeemsGood
twitch chat
August 2017

EU vs NA

NEVER SUBBED NEVER DONATED

twitchquotes: NEVER SUBBED TriHard NEVER DONATED TriHard ADBLOCK ON TriHard STOLEN LAPTOP TriHard NEIGHBOURS WIFI TriHard MOMMAS HOUSE TriHard STOLEN SOLAR PANELS TriHard STOLEN SUN TriHard SOLAR ENERGY STOLEN TriHard WATER WHEEL TriHard NEIGHBOURS RIVER TriHard STOLEN HYDROELECTRIC PLANT TriHard CHARGING PHONE WITH WORK ELECTRICITY TriHard SHOWER IN BATHROOM SINK TriHard STOLEN FOOD FROM CAFETERIA TriHard STOLEN HAMSTER TriHard STOLEN HAMSTER WHEEL TriHard KINETIC ENERGY TriHard FREE ENTERTAINMENT TriHard
twitch chat
November 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing