[Copypasta] I think I'm addicted to settings

God, I fucking love the settings app. I can't stop fucking changing the text size and checking for the new system update. God, the little slider icon turns me on so much. Whenever there is a system update I cry because I can't go on settings again. My screen time shows 107 hours of settings a day, which isn't even fucking possible.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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Pizza

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⣶⣶⣦⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣷⣤⠀⠈⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⠆⠰⠶⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⢀⣠⣤⣤⣀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠋⢈⣉⠉⣡⣤⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⢡⣾⣿⣿⣷⠋⠁⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠜⠁⠸⣿⣿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠰⠖⠱⣽⠟⠋⠉⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠉⠖⣀⠀⠀⢁⣀⠀⣴⣶⣦⠀⢴⡆⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣉⡽⠷⠶⠋⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡰⢡⣾⣿⣿⣿⡄⠛⠋⠘⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⣐⣲⣤⣯⠞⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⠔⠁⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⢀⣄⣀⡞⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡜⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⠿⣻⣥⣀⡀⢠⡟⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢰⠁⠀⡤⠖⠺⢶⡾⠃⠀⠈⠙⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠈⠓⠾⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
June 2019

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
July 2019

Something about Qtpie's play...

twitchquotes: i'm lying on my bed watching Qtpie stream.. my knees are up.. i'm trying to close my legs... but something about Qtpie's play makes me want to force my hands.. lower.. and lower.. i'm so embarassed...my fist is clenched so tight.. as i bite hard.. on my lips
twitch chat
January 2015
imaqtpie

Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022

You have just become intrigued as to what this spam is

twitchquotes: You have just become intrigued as to what this spam is, you go to the chat and scroll to hold it on the screen and indulge in its delights, as you continue to read you realize it does not contain anything funny or worth reading, and yet you highlight, copy it, paste it and send it.
twitch chat
November 2015
Text-to-Speech Playing