God, I fucking love the settings app. I can't stop fucking changing the text size and checking for the new system update. God, the little slider icon turns me on so much. Whenever there is a system update I cry because I can't go on settings again. My screen time shows 107 hours of settings a day, which isn't even fucking possible.
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Kermit the Frog and the Twin Towers
It is actual Muppets canon that Kermit the Frog, in some way, had a role in bringing down the Twin Towers in the terror attacks of September 11, 2001. In "It's a Very Muppets Christmas Movie," a film released in late 2002, Kermit is shown a glimpse of what New York City might look like if he had never been born. Among the scenery of this alternate reality NYC, we find none other than the Twin Towers proudly standing in the background. They were, of course, long destroyed in Kermit's normal reality. And yet, in the world without Kermit, the war on terror is missing its powder keg spark. Who would've thought that green piece of fuck could kermit a terror attack on US soil, but there it stands unimpeachable... We have concrete, canon proof of involvement. Why the world hasn't stopped and asked further questions is only further proof of a media cabal keeping this conversation away from the masses. The Twin Towers would still be standing if it weren't for Kermit the Frog. Al Qaeda was the puppet this time, and Kermit the hand within.
forsenSheffy
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⢿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡤⢲⠤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻
⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⢀⣞⣱⣜⣶⢱⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢨
⣿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣝⣿⣿⣷⣸⢰⣿⣷⡃⠄⠄⠄⣠⣾
⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠨⠿⠿⢿⠿⡿⣿⣿⠅⠄⣠⣾⣿⣿
⣷⣄⡀⠄⠄⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠰⣿⣥⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠘⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣤⣾⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣶⠆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠾⢿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠠⠚⣉⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠰⣢⣴⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⢰⣶⣾⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⡏⣷⣤⡄⣶⣿⣿⣁⠒⠤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⣮⣻⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣇⡟⢩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣦⣤⣤⠄⠄⠚⠈⠁⠘⣤⣀⣠⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣋⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⢈⣀⠄⠄⠄⢤⡙⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠰⠺⠁⠄⠄⢀⣀⣿⡤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣨⠉⠉⠄⣾⣿⣿⡗⠁⠄⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
Forsen
Emote
Response to "go fuck yourself"
What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
Classic
HELLO EU? How many games did you win?
twitchquotes:
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HELLO EU? 📞 How many games did you win today ? 📞
HELLO EU? 📞 How many games did you win today ? 📞
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