[Copypasta] It is canon that Kermit the Frog caused 9/11 in the Muppet universe

In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alrernate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene; however, they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

A Jerma clone showed up at my school as a substitute once

A Jerma clone showed up at my school as a substitute once. He comes is and is posturing like he’s really tall and large but the guy couldn’t be more than 5’4”. The class starts and he is just sitting there in quietly staring forward in the front of the class with an awfully distorted picture of his face that said β€œThe required information is in the lab directions” but he never handed us anything. This goes on for a minute until one of the talkative kids just asks if he is okay he hadn’t even taken a breath yet and veins were popping out of his neck and forehead. The moment the kid made a noise he stated wildly shaking his head around while making high pitched laser(?) sounds. Worst period of geology I’ve ever had. The rest was just him passing out the lab sheet but he would just hold it toward them motionless until they reached for it and he would snatch it away and laugh at them right in their face. Couldn’t find a more fucked guy if I tried. I'll edit in the image if anyone got a pic of it.
March 2022
Jerma985

Forsen, would you do me the honor...

twitchquotes: Forsen, would you do me the honor and fuck my in the ass? Ever since I was a little child I've always dreamed of getting fucked by a streamer. And now, many years later, I've finally found the right one. Forsen, please be my saviour and fuck so hard that I can't walk for a week. Kisses and hugs.
twitch chat
August 2014
Forsen

How come we can't ever invade a cool country (Generation Kill)

Look at this shit, how come we can't ever invade a cool country, like chicks in bikinis, you know, how come countries like that don't ever need Marines, I'll tell you why, it's lack of pussy that fucks countries up, lack of pussy is the root fucking cause of all global instability, if more hajis were getting quality pussy, there'd be no reason for us to come over and fuck em up like this, cause a nutbusting haji, is a happy haji.
March 2021

NaM emote

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–„ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–’β–’β–“β–“β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–€β–’β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–€β–’β–„β–„β–’β–“β–„β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–„β–‘β–€β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–“β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–„β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–„β–’β–“β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–“β–‘β–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
ascii art
October 2018

The year is 2088, Kripp lays tattered on his deathbed

twitchquotes: The year is 2088, Kripp lays tattered on his deathbed, his organs absolutely ravaged from years of veganism. He turns to his computer monitor for one last look at his beloved twitch chat only to see a bunch of weebs, emote spam and copy pasta. Tears fill his lifeless, vegan eyes. Rania is at his side as he draws on all his power to take his last breath and say the only enlightening words that come to mind.. "K"
twitch chat
October 2017
Kripp
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing