[Copypasta] It is canon that Kermit the Frog caused 9/11 in the Muppet universe

In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alrernate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene; however, they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
August 2021
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Grubhub perks gives you deals on the food you love

Grubhub perks gives you deals on the food you love ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⢿⢿⡿⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢘⣟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⠛⢛⣋⣁⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⡏⠀⠀⣸⣿⣯⠟⡛⠻⣿⣆⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡇⠀⣠⣿⢻⣿⣤⣍⣸⣿⠛⣿⠁⠏⠉⢹⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⠃⠀⠈⠉⠉⠛⢿⡼⠿⢶⣶⣶⣿⣃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⡿⠋⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⢸⡿⠿⠷⠏⠁⣠⣄⠀⠀⠀⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⡿⠋⠀⠀⢿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⢷⣦⣤⣤⡟⠻⡷⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⠟⢿⣄⠀⠀⠘⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣈⣉⣉⣴⡆⠀⠀⢀⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣴⡿⠁⠀⠀⢻⣷⡀⠀⠈⢿⣦⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣏⠉⠀⠀⣠⣿⢿⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢠⣾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⡄⠀⠀⠛⢿⣦⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣰⡿⠁⠈⢿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣾⣃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣱⡿⠁⠀⢠⠈⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣴⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠰⣿⢱⣦⠀⠘⠀⢹⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The kind of deals that make you boogie
February 2021

Twitch Chat created a strategy that revolved around...

twitchquotes: Twitch Chat created a strategy that revolved around trying to defeat your livestreamer in one minute with a bunch of copypasta in the chat. Fighting for chat control and battles between mods make an overall chat more fun and compelling, but taking the same pasta and copying it 20+ times is not particularly fun or interactive...
twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

Shrek is love. Shrek is life

I was only nine years old. I loved Shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies. I'd pray to Shrek every night before I go to bed, thanking for the life I've been given. "Shrek is love", I would say, "Shrek is life". My dad hears me and calls me a faggot. I knew he was just jealous for my devotion of Shrek. I called him a cunt. He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep. I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. A warmth is moving towards me. I feel something touch me. It's Shrek. I'm so happy. He whispers in my ear, "This is my swamp". He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I spread my ass-cheeks for Shrek. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for Shrek. I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against his force. I want to please Shrek. He roars a mighty roar, as he fills my butt with his love. My dad walks in. Shrek looks him straight in the eye, and says, "It's all ogre now". Shrek leaves through my window. Shrek is love. Shrek is life.
February 2021

Shrek

Classic

Oi

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠙⠻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣠⣴⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠂⠂⠂⠈⣿ ⣿⣿⠋⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⣀⣤⣤⣀⡀⠂⠂⠂⠂⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⠃⠂⠂⠂⠂⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠂⠂⠂⠂⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⡏⠂⠂⠂⠂⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⡀⠂⠂⠂⠂⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠂⠂⠂⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⣷⡀⠂⠂⠂⠂⠙⠻⠿⠿⠟⠋⠂⠂⠂⠂⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣾⣿
June 2019

What the heck did you just flipping say about me, you big meanie?

What the heck did you just flipping say about me, you big meanie? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Tiny Tots Program, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on the girl's bathroom, and I have over 300 confirmed noogies. I am trained in Nerf warfare and I have the most gold stars in the entire kindergarten class. You are nothing to me but just another butthead. I will beat you the heck up with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my dang words. You think you can get away with saying that baloney to me on the glowy type-box? Think again, doodiehead. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of teachers across the USA and your parents are being called to pick you up right now so you better prepare for the spanking, junior. The spanking that wipes out the dumb little thing you call your playtime. You're in big darn trouble, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can wedgie you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed fartfights, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States PTA and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your dorky bottom off the face of the playground, you little poopypants. If only you could have known what serious punishments your little "smartypants" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your goshdarned tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you silly doofus. I will spray boogers all over you and you will cry about it. You're frickin grounded, buttmunch...
August 2021

Navy Seal

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