Sleeping naked is a power move anyways.
• Burglar breaks in boom I’m up and naked. He’s too distracted trying to determine if I’m a man or woman because of my massive bush to notice me reaching for my glock fawty.
• When I pee or poop in my sleep from the nightmares I don’t get any clothes dirty just the sheets.
• Save money on not having to run an AC in the summer time so I can buy my wife more lingerie for her boyfriend to appreciate.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
We are not the same (Amogus edition)
We are not the same
For instance
You say kid 👦 we say mini-crewmate
You say earth 🌎 we say Mira-hq
You say suspicious🥷, we say sussy bakas
You say “he was murdered so I called the police”, we say “EMERGENCY MEETING”
You say “the joke is dead” we say Among us poop mod 2021 (still working) (free) (not click bait)
Among Us / Amogus
BibleThump
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What the fuck are you doing in my fucking swamp you little Farquaad?
What the fuck are you doing in my fucking swamp you little Farquaad? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the brogres, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on your anus, and have ogre 300 confirmed layers. I am trained in making early 2000's pop cultural references, and am the top ogre in the entire far far away armed forces. You are nothing to me but another Drek. I will wipe you out with precision the likes of which have never been seen in Dreamworks, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that dreck to me over the swamp? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of fairy tale creatures across Far Far Away and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, Farquaad. The storm that will end your fucking life. It's fucking ogre, Donkey. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare asscheeks. Not only am I shrextensively trained in onionade combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the Fairy Godmothers Factory and I will use it to its full shrextent to wipe your miserable little ass of of the face of meh swamp, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little clever comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn Rumpelstiltskin. I will slay abuse all ogre you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, Pinocchio.
Shrek
Navy Seal
Mr Michael Santana, this is your German teacher
twitchquotes:
Mr Michael Santana, this is your German teacher. I am very disappoint in your German speaking abilities. I request that you repeat zu words: Blauschimmelkäse, Kachelofen, Ziegeneutermilch and Schachspielzug three times a day for the next month.
twitch chat
imaqtpie
If Harambe and my girl both drowning
twitchquotes:
If harambe 🐒 and my girl 👧 😍 both drowning 😱 👋 and I can only save one 😤 😬 Catch me at my girl funeral 😔 👻 🌹 with my dick out 😏 💯 😎 🍆
twitch chat