[Copypasta] Sleeping naked is a power move anyways

Sleeping naked is a power move anyways. • ⁠Burglar breaks in boom I’m up and naked. He’s too distracted trying to determine if I’m a man or woman because of my massive bush to notice me reaching for my glock fawty. ⁠• ⁠When I pee or poop in my sleep from the nightmares I don’t get any clothes dirty just the sheets. • ⁠Save money on not having to run an AC in the summer time so I can buy my wife more lingerie for her boyfriend to appreciate.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

SAVE THE INTERNET

twitchquotes: "SAVE THE INTERNET" refers to the imminent removal of net neutrality, which requires Internet Service Providers (ISPs) to treat the provision of internet service as a UTILITY not a LUXURY, thereby requiring them to provide it FAIRLY to EVERYONE, and not just people/businesses who pay premiums to receive the same service as before. It also restricts them from unfairly throttling speeds and access to specific websites. If net neutrality is abolished, Twitch will be inaccessible to most Americans.
twitch chat
July 2017

Exquisite 18th century baroque music

twitchquotes: Monsieur Reckful 5Head 🍷 Would you be so kind to put on some exquisite 18th century baroque music, perhaps Albinoni - Adagio in G Minor?
twitch chat
June 2019
Reckful

Forgor what? Forgor how to be funny?

Forgor what? Forgor how to be funny? Shut up you absolute troglodyte. Misspelling a word is not funny anymore, you just sound like an idiot. And don't even get me started about the 💀 emoji at the end. What is dead? Is it your unfunny jokes from 2020? But Shut the fuck up you unfunny bitch Forgor what? Forgor how to be funny? Shut up you absolute troglodyte. Misspelling a word is not funny anymore, you just sound like an idiot. And don't even get me started about the 💀 emoji at the end. What is dead? Is it your unfunny jokes from 2020? But Shut the fuck up you unfunny bitch Forgor what? Forgor how to be funny? Shut up you absolute troglodyte. Misspelling a word is not funny anymore, you just sound like an idiot. And don't even get me started about the 💀 emoji at the end. What is dead? Is it your unfunny jokes from 2020? Shut the fuck up you unfunny bitch.
October 2021

I forgor

Trolling My Dad's Office with Among Us (Office Series Part 6, Finale Part 3)

The other day, it was “take your kid to work day” at my dad’s job. It was really epic and poggers because I got to skip school for it. As we were walking in, I couldn’t help but notice that the company logo roughly resembled a crewmate from the popular game, Among Us. I asked my father, “Is this the Among Us but real??” My dad replied “No, son, this is the Pepsico corporate office.” As we entered the building, my dad said “Son, I have a lot of work to do today. You can hang out with the other kids or play on your phone, just please stay on this floor.” He then entered the elevator and left. I turned to the other kids (who were all playing on their phones) and said “Does anyone wanna play some Among Us?” However, no one else wanted to play. I was getting bored, so I decided to explore around a little bit. I walked into the elevator and pressed the button for the top floor.As the elevator door opened, I saw what appeared to be a long hallway. As I was walking down it, I found a door that was labeled “Executive Meeting Room”. The door was unlocked, so I walked in and there were about 15 people in suits and ties around a table. They all looked up at me in confusion. One of them asked me “Hey buddy, are you lost?” I noticed that his nametag read “Hugh Johnson, CFO”. “Does CFO stand for Chungus Fortnite Officer?”, I asked. “No, it does not. And where is your parent? Go back to the bottom floor young man!” He was yelling at me. So I said “You’re sus. I should eject you, Hugh Johnson. Do you have a… HUGE JOHNSON?! That’s funny like Big Chungus, which is the Bugs Bunny from Looney Tunes but a big rabbit!” I laughed. Everyone was looking up at me in shock when I said “Wanna play some Among Us guys?” The CEO, a very sexy woman, ooga booga awooga, said “Young man, go back to the first floor now!” But the sexy woman I just couldn’t listen to as I admired her. “No, because you have big tits.” Her jaw dropped, and she said, “Young man, this is an important meeting. Get the fuck out!” She then used the intercom to call security. Coming to the realization that I was running out of time, I pulled down my pants to show everyone my Among Us underwear. I jumped up onto the meeting table and started twerking (to make sure everyone saw my among us underwear I got for Christmas) and said “Do you like what you see?” Everyone was yelling at me to get out as I was twerking. “I’m so hot~~~~” I said. The yelling got louder. I ran out of the door and closed it, hoping that security wouldn’t find me. I quickly ran into the elevator and went down.
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

cyrSwag

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿ ⢿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿ ⣾⣻⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠖⠻⠟⠛⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠆⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣤⡶⠦⣤⣄⠠⣤⣨⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠁⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⣶⡄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣯⣀⣀⣀⣴⣵⣎⣻⣿⣿⣟⠁⠄⡐⠲⠄⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡁⣟⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡆⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡻⣷⡆⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣽⣿⣶⣆⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠅⢸⣿⡏⠿⣿⣿⢫⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠐⠛⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⡁⠬⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⠷⠈⣱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⢀⡀⠈⠿⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠻⠟⠒⠛⠛⠿⠿⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣻⣿⣽⠏⠄⠈⣿⣥⡀⠄⠄⠈⠉⠘⠃⠄⠄⠄⠁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣶⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀ ⠉⣈⡀⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣾⣷⣦⣀⣀⢀⢀⣀⡀⢀⣿⣿⡿⢿⣁⠄⠄⣠⣠⣿⣯ ⡈⣛⣛⣄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣡⡾⠛⢁⣴⣿⣿⣦⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿
December 2020
cyr
Text-to-Speech Playing