Sleeping naked is a power move anyways.
• Burglar breaks in boom I’m up and naked. He’s too distracted trying to determine if I’m a man or woman because of my massive bush to notice me reaching for my glock fawty.
• When I pee or poop in my sleep from the nightmares I don’t get any clothes dirty just the sheets.
• Save money on not having to run an AC in the summer time so I can buy my wife more lingerie for her boyfriend to appreciate.
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Only the saltiest EU fan can hold both cans
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⎠CoolCat
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢱⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣼⣿⣿⡏⢹⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⡿⣻⣿⡷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⠤⣤⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣇⢋⠟⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⢧⣤⣀⣀⠀
⢠⡖⠉⠴⢾⣿⡿⠋⠐⠈⢹⣿⣇⠢⡎⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠈⣿⣿⡇
⢸⠁⠀⣃⣀⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡟⠀⠈⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⣿⠁⠀
⠈⡇⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⢰⡀⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀
⠀⠹⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠚⣠⣔⣶⠀⢀⡘⢦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⢿⡆⠀
⠀⠀⠈⠐⠲⠶⠒⠋⠁⢾⡎⠻⠉⠡⠾⠋⣀⡈⠙⢒⣒⠠⠤⣤⣖⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣄⡀⠀⢋⠉⠀⠁⠀⠐⠐⠲⣶⣶⣿⠧⠁⢀⠶⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣄
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣆⣙⢿⣷⣼⣛⠿⡷⠶⢶⣶⡾⢟⡋⢅⠀⠀⠀⢈⣁⣺⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⢀⢀⣠⣿⣿⣯⣭⣽⣿⡿⠛⠻⢿⣿⣯⣧⡨⣮⡶⡤⠢⠽⠽⠿⣿⣿⣷⣿
⠀⠀⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢷⣤⠉⢹⣯⣿⣜⣟⠊⠁⠀⣰⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⢼⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⢹⣿⡿⡵⣴⡌⠋⡟⠿⠎⡓⠞⠏⠙⠉⣉⣄⣼⣶
I’ve been wondering if I might be a gay
Recently, I’ve been wondering if I might be a gay. It all started a week ago. I was sitting on the toilet, pooping, when all of a sudden, a big shit turd comes out of my ass. It was huge. Big big. It’s so fucking big, I gotta look down into the toilet to check for blood. No blood, but the turd is fucking massive. I notice something strange about it. The end of the turd, sticking out of the water, looks like a dick head. A penis head. Needless to say, I was concerned. How could this be? I picked it up from the water, and put it back up my ass. To my surprise, it felt good. I then shit it back into the water. Splash. I then repeated this a few more times, moaning out “Oscar Winning actor Anthony Hopkins” each time. I am not sure if I am now gay. My boyfriend says it’s completely normal, but he’s gay, so I can’t trust him.
Are you Reynad's dad?
twitchquotes:
I went to a MTG tournament in Denver to meet Brian Kibler and ask him in person "Are you Reynad's dad?" I needed the truth. I approached Kibler and asked him for a semen sample. Kibler gave a coy smile, "There's only one way you're getting semen out of me." I got on my knees and took the sample. I still don't know if Kibler is Reydad but we've been dating for 5 days now.
twitch chat
Reynad
Excited Homer Simpson
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠏⢀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣴⢶⣶⣿⣟⣶⣿⣭⠿⠦⠤⠽⣷⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢫⣿⢋⣠⣿⣿⡶⢻⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠙⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⣿⣿⡿⠋⠈⣸⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠀⠈⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⢯⠋⠈⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠒⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⢼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠤⠤⠤⣀⠀⢀⡀⠤⠤⠤⣀⣱⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢀⡖⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠱⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠴⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠶⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⢀⡴⠋⠉⢹⡶⠶⢤
⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⢻⡜⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠶⠒⠒⠀⠐⣄⡼⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⠟⠛⠓⠶⣏⠀⠀⣀
⠀⠀⠀⢸⢧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠷⠙⠲⠄⠀⡀⠠⠔⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⡇⡧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡀⠀⠀⠈⢦⠞⠁
⠀⠀⠀⢸⡈⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠧⣄⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠖⠒⠚⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠀⠈⠙⠦⣀⣠⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠀⠈⢢⡀⠠⢾⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⢲⡶⡄⠀⢀⡶⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢁⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⡎⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀
⡀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⡴⠀⣾⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⡷⢰⠃⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠
⠙⢦⡀⠀⠈⠛⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢦⣀⣠⠎⢀⣤⣾⡿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠞⠀
⠀⠀⠈⠳⢄⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠙⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠃⠀⣠⣴⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡰⠁⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠈⠳⠤⣀⡀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠤⡖⠋⢀⡤⠾⠿⣏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢨⠇⠙⢿⠷⠖⠒⠛⠓⠒⠚⠛⠯⡉⠉⠀⠀⡷⠶⠯⡁⠀⠀⠀⠙⠢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠜⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡌⠀⠀⠀⠳⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡌⠀⠙⢆⠀⠀⡧⠂⠀⢡⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡔⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠌⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⡀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠃⠀⠀⠈⠣⡴⠉⠡⡀⠈⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠄⠀⢀⡴⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢩⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⡀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣶⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⣷⣄⣠⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢡⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⣿⣎⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⢤⡤⠴⠒⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀