[Copypasta] Sleeping naked is a power move anyways

Sleeping naked is a power move anyways. • ⁠Burglar breaks in boom I’m up and naked. He’s too distracted trying to determine if I’m a man or woman because of my massive bush to notice me reaching for my glock fawty. ⁠• ⁠When I pee or poop in my sleep from the nightmares I don’t get any clothes dirty just the sheets. • ⁠Save money on not having to run an AC in the summer time so I can buy my wife more lingerie for her boyfriend to appreciate.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Troll face kid

░░░░░░▄▄▄▄▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▄▄▄▄▄▄▄ ░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▀▀▄ ░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ ░░░█░░░░░░▄██▀▄▄░░░░░▄▄▄░░░░█ ░▄▀░▄▄▄░░█▀▀▀▀▄▄█░░░██▄▄█░░░░█ █░░█░▄░▀▄▄▄▀░░░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░█ █░░█░█▀▄▄░░░░░█▀░░░░▀▄░░▄▀▀▀▄░█ ░█░▀▄░█▄░█▀▄▄░▀░▀▀░▄▄▀░░░░█░░█ ░░█░░░▀▄▀█▄▄░█▀▀▀▄▄▄▄▀▀█▀██░█ ░░░█░░░░██░░▀█▄▄▄█▄▄█▄▄██▄░░█ ░░░░█░░░░▀▀▄░█░░░█░█▀█▀█▀██░█ ░░░░░▀▄░░░░░▀▀▄▄▄█▄█▄█▄█▄▀░░█ ░░░░░░░▀▄▄░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ ░░▐▌░█░░░░▀▀▄▄░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ ░░░█▐▌░░░░░░█░▀▄▄▄▄▄░░░░░░░░█ ░░███░░░░░▄▄█░▄▄░██▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▀ ░▐████░░▄▀█▀█▄▄▄▄▄█▀▄▀▄ ░░█░░▌░█░░░▀▄░█▀█░▄▀░░░█ ░░█░░▌░█░░█░░█░░░█░░█░░█ ░░█░░▀▀░░██░░█░░░█░░█░░█ ░░░▀▀▄▄▀▀░█░░░▀▄▀▀▀▀█░░█ ░░░░░░░░░░█░░░░▄░░▄██▄▄▀ ░░░░░░░░░░█░░░░▄░░████ ░░░░░░░░░░█▄░░▄▄▄░░▄█ ░░░░░░░░░░░█▀▀░▄░▀▀█ ░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░█░░░█ ░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░▐░░░█ ░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░▐░░░█ ░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░▐░░░█ ░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░▐░░░█ ░░░░░░░░░░░█░░░▐░░░█ ░░░░░░░░░░░█▄▄▄▐▄▄▄█ ░░░░░░░▄▄▄▄▀▄▄▀█▀▄▄▀▄▄▄▄ ░░░░░▄▀▄░▄░▄░░░█░░░▄░▄░▄▀▄ ░░░░░█▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▀▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄█
March 2021

I am not a simp.

twitchquotes: And I want to say this to the kings in the audience. I’ve made my mistakes in my chase for coochie. But in all of my years of chad life, I have never simped– never simped for a girl. I’ve earned every bit of cooch. And in all of my years of chad life, I have never paid for the meal. Because people have got to know whether or not I’m a simp. Well, I’m not a simp. I’ve never simped for any girl I’ve got. I am not a simp.
twitch chat
July 2020

Simps

Should We Ban Jerma From Our Gay Wedding?

Should We Ban Jerma From Our Gay Wedding? Okay, so my boyfriend and I have been talking and we're looking to get married in the next year or so once it's safe. We've been talking seriously about this and we absolutely want to ensure that TOTAL PSYCHOPATH Jerma ABSOLUTELY does NOT come to our wedding. I was thinking maybe putting up “beware of sus guy” photos around the venue? Maybe watching his tier list videos and picking his least favorite snacks? How can we best do this, do you think? SHOULD we do this? Many thanks. (Oh, and P.S., if there’s a way we could invite Otto without his COMPLETELY UNHINGED RAT FILMOGRAPHER OWNER joining, that would be optimal :) )
December 2021
Jerma985

Pokemon Marathon Season 1 intermission

twitchquotes: ResidentSleeper CATERPIE ResidentSleeper THAT GIRL ResidentSleeper I KNOW I KNOW ResidentSleeper IM STUPID ResidentSleeper DUPLICA ResidentSleeper DONUT ResidentSleeper NOT YOU PSYDUCK ResidentSleeper PITY BADGE ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
August 2018

Pokemon Marathon 2018

BOB “You’re doing GREAT out there!”

twitchquotes: BOB “You’re doing GREAT out there!” I exclaim with as much enthusiasm as I can this late in the day. The scraggly vegan is the only one left in the tavern, his attention focused entirely on the card game we put out to entertain children and toddlers. “I don’t wanna talk about it guys” cries the man, knocking his cup of vegan water over. I try to reassure him that everyone has bad luck now and then, but he just ignores me, as always. This tavern attracts some strange types indeed.
twitch chat
September 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing