[Copypasta] The year is 2037. Ligma is now the name of a real disease

The year is 2037. Ligma is now the name of a real disease. You're a doctor you just got the test results of the patient it's just as you feared it's fatal, your patient has ligma you're crying but you can't stop laughing you know you have to tell your patient that he has ligma but you can't keep a straight face you have to go out therr and tell your patient that he has only three days left to live and that there's no cure no hope not even enough time for him to finish his bucket list or find love or get the life he's always wanted he started making progress, he was doing well, his future had high hopes but he has a fatal case of ligma and you can't keep a straight face you walk out to your patient, "s-sir," you say through snickers "yes doctor? what are my test results?" your patient replies "I-I'm very sorry to say but," you respond as your sentence gets interrupted by a loud snort. "it's f-f-atal." you can't hold your laughs and you let out a bit of laughter "Is this some kind of joke? are you some sadistic creep? why the fuck are you laughing" the patient shouts out you "you h-have a fatal case of l-l-ligma," you can't hold it in anymore, you burst out laughing, you're rolling on the floor, tears in your eyes, you pee yourself a little "what the fuck is wrong with you? you're horrible! fuck you! go to hell!" your patient replies, with a face of horror, disgust, anger and sadness. he starts to cry. he's shaking you scream at the top of your lungs, "LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LIGMA BALLS!" you can't stop laughing and shouting, over and over again you repeat "LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS!" your patient flees, he runs as fast as he can soon the police come, they handcuff you and put you in the back of a police car. you don't know what's going to happen to you now, but you know it won't be good
August 2021
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This is so small to read even for you bro

twitchquotes: α΅€Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ αΆ¦Λ’ Λ’α΅’ ˒ᡐᡃ᢫᢫ α΅—α΅’ Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆ ᡉᡛᡉᢰ αΆ α΅’Κ³ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ ᡇʳᡒ⋅ α΄°α΅’αΆ°α΅— α΅—Κ³ΚΈ α΅—α΅’ αΆœα΅’αΆ°α΅—αΆ¦αΆ°α΅˜α΅‰ Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆαΆ¦αΆ°α΅ α΅—Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ α΅‡α΅‰αΆœα΅ƒα΅˜Λ’α΅‰ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜Κ³ ᡉʸᡉ˒ Κ·αΆ¦αΆ«αΆ« ˒ᡗᡃʳᡗ α΅—α΅’ Κ°α΅˜Κ³α΅— Λ’α΅’α΅’αΆ° αΆ¦αΆ  ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ α΅ˆα΅’αΆ°α΅— Λ’α΅—α΅’α΅–β‹… α΅‚Κ°ΚΈ α΅ˆα΅’αΆ°α΅— ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ ˒ᡗᡒᡖ﹖⋅⋅⋅⋅ᡍᡒ ᡃʷᡃʸ ᡇʳᡒ α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆ ᡗʰᡉ ᢰᡉˣᡗ αΆœα΅’α΅–ΚΈα΅–α΅ƒΛ’α΅—α΅ƒβ‹… Λ’α΅—α΅’α΅– Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆαΆ¦αΆ°α΅ α΅ƒαΆ«Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆΚΈοΉ— α΄΅ ˒ᡉᡉ ᡗʰᡃᡗ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ α΅ˆα΅’αΆ°α΅— ʷᡃᢰᢰᡃ ᡍᢦᡛᡉ α΅˜α΅– Κ³α΅‰α΅ƒα΅ˆαΆ¦αΆ°α΅οΉ–β‹…β‹…β‹…Κ·α΅‰αΆ«αΆ« ᡒᡏ, ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ Κ·α΅’αΆ° α΅—Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ ᡗᢦᡐᡉ, α΅‡α΅˜α΅— ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ Λ’Κ°α΅’α΅˜αΆ«α΅ˆ αΆœα΅’α΅–ΚΈα΅–α΅ƒΛ’α΅—α΅‰ α΅—Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ ᡗʰᡃᢰᡏ ᡐᡉ αΆ α΅’Κ³ ʷᡃ˒ᡗᢦᢰᡍ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜Κ³ ᡗᢦᡐᡉ α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ ˒ᡗʳᡉ˒˒ᢦᢰᡍ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜Κ³ ᡉʸᡉ˒ α΅—Κ°α΅’
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp

monkaEyes

β£€β£Ύβ£Ώβ’»β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ώβ Ÿβ ›β ‹β ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β ™β ›β’Ώβ Ώβ ›β ›β ›β ›β ›β ›β ›β “β €β „ ⣿⣿⣧⣭⣿⣿⣋⑀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ β „πŸ”΄ β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ πŸ”΄ β „β „β’Έ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣢⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣴⣾⣦⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀③⠋
June 2019

Pepe

For every copy paste I will pushup

twitchquotes: πŸ’ͺ for πŸ’ͺ every πŸ’ͺ copy/paste πŸ’ͺ I πŸ’ͺ will πŸ’ͺ do πŸ’ͺ 1 πŸ’ͺ pushup πŸ’ͺ
twitch chat
September 2017

How to deal with unsportsmanlike player at chess club?

Theres a very unsportsmanlike player at our club who constantly taunts and belittles everyone else. Whenver you make a mistake he yells out "blunder!" or "inaccuracy!" ... "better move was..." and then says the engine move or what he thinks the engine move is. He also says what he thinks the engine +- is. He plays the kings gambit as much as he can and knows like 30 moves deep into every variation. If you respond something other than e5 to 1.e4 he just laughs and calls you a patzer. He's also OBSESSED with Hikaru Nakamura. He talks about him all the time and shows everyone a picture of him with Hikaru (Its really blurry so its hard to tell if its even him). He's constantly talking about him as if he's a close friend even though he only (maybe?) met him one time. Its bordering on creepy and makes everyone uncomfortable. He calls him "Hikaru-San" which I think is part of his obsession with Japanese culture. He also brings japanese noodles/Ramen to the club every day and will spend like 5-10 minute eating them during his turn just to taunt you. Meanwhile he will be mumbling words in japanese. We tried approaching about his conduct but he just did some weird anime villain laugh, yelled something in Japanese, then ran off to challenge another person to a blitz match. We obviously don't want to tell him not to come but it feels like his presence is deterring new people from joining and its also exhuasting.
February 2022

Chess

Kappa

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–“β–’β–“β–“β–’β–“β–’β–’β–“β–’β–“β–€β–„β–‘β–‘ β–„β–€β–’β–’β–“β–’β–“β–’β–’β–“β–’β–“β–’β–“β–“β–’β–’β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–“β–’β–“β–’β–“β–’β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–“β–‘β–‘β–’β–€β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘ β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–€β–„β–„β–’β–€β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–„β–’β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–’β–’β–„β–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing