[Copypasta] No, you are not a “Man of Culture”

No, you are not a “Man of Culture”. You are a 19 year old who has no romantic partner because you have a chronic addiction to anime porn where the characters dont look or sound any older than 13, seriously, the stuff you are watching should be illegal. Getting off to fictional drawings of ambiguous age THREE times a day is not even remotely cultured, it just makes you a sex-addicted pedophile. What’s gotten into you? You’re better than this.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

I hardly ever watch twitch anymore

twitchquotes: I hardly ever watch twitch anymore, and it’s mostly because of cringe chat. All you do is copy and paste the same things or constantly repeat the same stupid emotes in response to everything. So predictable and annoying
twitch chat
September 2020

So as a joke, I fucked my friend in a trollface cosplay

So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing a trollface mask and black morph suit. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as your mother (after I have sexual intercourse with her) and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made me feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my morph suit. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "Cover yourself in oil." He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "You mad bro?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "We do a little trolling!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came. His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'm still Trollface."
September 2021

NSFW

It was dinner time at the Overwatch GAYmer house

twitchquotes: It was dinner time at the Overwatch GAYmer house. Moonmoon dishes up a steamy plate of pasta when he realizes he forgot the meat. Seagull looks up from his plate, the gleam in his eye. "I got the meat right here for you baby" lubing up with marinara sauce Seagull begins to pound his sausage into moonmoons tight lightly buttered dinner roll. The scream of delight, Seagull releases his load, calling an end to yet another successful team dinner
twitch chat
August 2017
MOONMOON

KappaPride

Overwatch

This endeavor of knowledge 5Head

twitchquotes: 5Head 🍷 Ah yes, I can feel my head throbbing with knowledge and wisdom as I sip upon this Sauvignon blanc. Come chatroom, who will join me in this endeavor of knowledge 5Head 🍷
twitch chat
September 2019

Classic

What if TF2 injuries were more realistic?

Just imagine: You are playing 2fort as RED team and pick heavy, you get out of spawn when suddenly a Pyro with the Homewrecker hits you square on the head. Your Heavy falls down and makes a weird snoring sound and has a nasty gash in his head with clear fluid running out of his ears. Then for like 30 minutes the screen goes black and you hear Heavy being transported into an ambulance. After the 30 mins Heavy opens his eyes a little. It looks like hes in the ICU and is currently getting artificially ventilated. Then the screen goes black again for 3 days until Heavy opens his eyes a little to see a woman, presumably heavys wife, crying beside his bed. She says something but it seems like Heavy doesnt understand anything she is saying, only thing you clearly make out is "permanent brain damage" and how sorry she is for never talking you out of your Mercenary profession. Then the screen goes black for another 5 months with some short times of conciousness inbetween until you see the same woman with 2 kids talking to your doctor in the ICU. All you can make out is that they decided to end your suffering and pull the plug. The last thing you see is heavys eyes closing, until you suddenly respawn in RED Spawn.
January 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing