[Copypasta] I'm the Server Manager for PinkieCraft, the Pony Roleplay Minecraft server that you play on

Hi (name), I'm the Server Manager for PinkieCraft, the Pony Roleplay Minecraft server that you play on. On behalf of the owner, the staff team and myself, I would like to personally extend my thanks to you for the $1,000 you forked up to help keep our server alive! Our modeler is happily working on the custom pony character that came with the donor package, however I regret to inform you that we don't currently have a way to send you the 20" "horse shaft" you requested but our team is working on it. Once again, thank you sincerely for the donation, and we hope to see you back on the server soon. Best Regards, PinkieCraft Server Manager "Keep on clopping."
September 2021
I used to be a real ad
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twitch chat
December 2017

Net Neutrality

Do British people even exist?

Do british people actually exist? I mean, they must be a meme, there is a not a single thing about them. And I mean it. Let's go through the evidence: Where are they from? Not a single country in the world is named Britain. Some people say they come from England, and England is inside Britain, but if that was the case they would be British they would be Englanders. Also, heard some silly theories about them coming from whales. Guys, no, whale people do not exist. Whales live in the sea. There is a consensus on British people coming from Europe, but then we are left with a whole continent of possible locations. That's as good as nothing. What do they eat? Every country has at least one main dish. Even the US has their burgers. But these British people, what do they eat? Heard some people associating them with tea, but everyone knows that's an Asian thing. Shouldn't they come from Europe? One of these two points must be wrong them. To me, it looks too sketchy. What language do they speak? I challenge you, putting all my money and my ass on the line here, to find a supposed ""British"" person speaking their native language. Most of then just speak a broken ENGLISH. Yes, english. Really suspicious, huh? And I even tried to look deeper into it. Maybe british just SOUND like english, just like spanish could sound like portuguese for a non-speaker. So I looked up "british dictionary on google" and what I found was shocking: every word in there was AMERICAN. I kid you not. What this could mean is beyond my capabilities, but I can safely assure you that british people do not exist .
December 2020

British People

Classic

We subbed because we have cash, non-subs are trash

twitchquotes: Hey you poor, underaged trash. You know what the symbol next to my name means? Means I am sub. Means im VIP. Means I got cash. What you got? You got sh!t. You poor non-sub trash ought to pay me and my sub-bros some respect. We subbed because we have cash. Real life jobs, real life credit
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp

All is then right with the world

twitchquotes: Maybe his long Journey away from the evil drug that is Hearthstone has brought moral clarity to his life. Kripp rises up and breaks away from the shackles the succubus has locked Kripp in. Papaparrian holds the key and sets Kripp's mind free. He swears to never go back to Greece or play Hearthstone ever again. Kripp moves back in with Papa and finally gets his OJ sponsorship. The beautifully creamy wall is vibrant as Kripp uploads his newest video in the old wonderland. "Hey guys how's it going, Kripparian here." Kripp starts up PoE again in anticipation of the new expansion being released, theory crafting builds. He is happy and filled with life each day of streaming. All is then right with the world.
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp

Would you like to get rich by running your own business

Hey๐Ÿ‘‹ ladies๐Ÿ’โ€โ™€๏ธ ๐Ÿ“ท Would ๐Ÿ˜ you ๐Ÿ‘ˆ like ๐Ÿ‘ to 2๏ธโƒฃ get ๐Ÿ˜ฎ rich ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ฐ by running ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™€๏ธ your ๐Ÿ‘ˆ own business ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿ’ผ๐Ÿ’ผ from home ๐Ÿก with just โ˜ your phone? ๐Ÿ“ฑ๐Ÿคณ Well ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™€๏ธ you can't. ๐Ÿ˜‚ Get ๐Ÿ‘ a ๐Ÿ‘ real ๐Ÿ‘ job ๐Ÿ‘ you ๐Ÿ‘ stupid ๐Ÿ‘ cunt
March 2021

Emoji Pasta

Text-to-Speech Playing