[Copypasta] You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you

You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you. You are going to be the target of the greatest lawsuit the world has ever seen. You don't know why? It's completely obvious. It's so obvious, the most deplorable peasant could grasp the full magnitude of your wickedness and treachery with the greatest of ease. Your actions cry out for mercy, and I will be happy to deliver it. And if you're thinking this is a mistake, or merely a deception of mine, you're sadly mistaken, my friend. I have indisputable proof of your continued harassment and other offenses. Even without it, the jury would take one look at you and decide. The incomprehensible magnitude of your crimes brings with it unavoidable, infinite guilt, and whether you notice it or not, everyone else does. Are you interested in who will be serving as the offense attorney? I'll tell you. It's my father. Your defense? It doesn't matter, in fact, they might just not give you one even to spare just one individual from the trauma. My father is the greatest lawyer in the US, the world, and human history, including the future, which he knows due to the fact that he sued the future and they travelled back in time to tell him. He's served for hundreds of Supreme Court cases, and he's won every single one. You may have never thought about being court-marshaled, but now, that's a real threat. That is the power of my father, a culmination of flawless, supreme logic and a perfect knowledge of the law. You will lose this case, your money, and your life. Does that scare you, insignificant bug? Because it should. The entire history of the U.S. Judicial System has been leading up to this moment, where all of its fury is concentrated on ruining your life. My father won't even need to help. Your heinous crimes will be evident to all, so just give up, you crook. Give up before you're forced to.
September 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Please stop hoarding Hearthstone dust

twitchquotes: ༼ ºل͟º ༽ Well Met Kripp, this is Doctorino Dongerino. I urge you: pls stop hoarding Hearthstone dust. Breathing in all that dust will cause your lungs to RIP in pepperonis. Pls copypasta to save Kripp life ༼ ºل͟º ༽
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

FREEDOM ୧༼ಠ益ಠ╭∩╮༽ SUBS

twitchquotes: FREEDOM ୧༼ಠ益ಠ╭∩╮༽ SUBS
twitch chat
March 2016

plebs vs subs

I have to print out chat in order to read it

twitchquotes: Hey guys, my monitor isn't working. I have to print out chat in order to read it. The paper and ink are really expensive, so please don't spam! Thank you.
twitch chat
September 2018

Classic

Hey Reynad, Melvin Roede de Paard

twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad

The default dance is truly a masterpiece

twitchquotes: The 🕺🏻default dance🕺🏻 is truly a 🖊masterpiece. Never❌in all of history🕖🕗🕘🕙🕚has such an artistic masterpiece🖊 ever been created. The choreography💃🏻 is possibly the most beautiful😍 sight👀 ever beheld by the human💁🏻‍♂️ eye👁. The sharp 🔪sound of the SLAP👏 when the player’s hands👐 collide perfectly 💯 with the beat of the song 🎵 sends a bone chilling☠️ shiver down my spine, every single time 🕘I hear it👂🏻. I find my self watching 👀my in-game 🎮avatar performing this phenomenal dance ritual 💃🏻for hours🕧 on end.
twitch chat
November 2018

Emoji Pasta

Fortnite

Text-to-Speech Playing