[Copypasta] You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you

You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you. You are going to be the target of the greatest lawsuit the world has ever seen. You don't know why? It's completely obvious. It's so obvious, the most deplorable peasant could grasp the full magnitude of your wickedness and treachery with the greatest of ease. Your actions cry out for mercy, and I will be happy to deliver it. And if you're thinking this is a mistake, or merely a deception of mine, you're sadly mistaken, my friend. I have indisputable proof of your continued harassment and other offenses. Even without it, the jury would take one look at you and decide. The incomprehensible magnitude of your crimes brings with it unavoidable, infinite guilt, and whether you notice it or not, everyone else does. Are you interested in who will be serving as the offense attorney? I'll tell you. It's my father. Your defense? It doesn't matter, in fact, they might just not give you one even to spare just one individual from the trauma. My father is the greatest lawyer in the US, the world, and human history, including the future, which he knows due to the fact that he sued the future and they travelled back in time to tell him. He's served for hundreds of Supreme Court cases, and he's won every single one. You may have never thought about being court-marshaled, but now, that's a real threat. That is the power of my father, a culmination of flawless, supreme logic and a perfect knowledge of the law. You will lose this case, your money, and your life. Does that scare you, insignificant bug? Because it should. The entire history of the U.S. Judicial System has been leading up to this moment, where all of its fury is concentrated on ruining your life. My father won't even need to help. Your heinous crimes will be evident to all, so just give up, you crook. Give up before you're forced to.
September 2021
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Salt can

โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–’โ–’โ–โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–€โ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œ โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–โ–ˆโ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–Œโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’
November 2014

Hearthstone vs MTG Online

twitchquotes: Tbh, this game is too boring for anyone to understand. Hearthstone is already boring enough to the extant that pretty much no one can sit through it unless youre at a professional level. This is just to unfathomably boring. I know this is an indie game, but seriously if anyone think that this garbage can compete with an older game like HS, youre mistaken.
twitch chat
March 2018

Hearthstone

Kripp subscribes to life

twitchquotes: ๏ผฉใ€€๏ฝ•๏ฝŽ๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝ‚๏ฝ“๏ฝƒ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ‚๏ฝ…๏ฝ„ใ€€๏ฝ†๏ฝ’๏ฝ๏ฝใ€€๏ฝŒ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ†๏ฝ…ใ€€๏ฝ”๏ฝใ€€๏ฝ—๏ฝ๏ฝ”๏ฝƒ๏ฝˆใ€€๏ผซ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ผŒใ€€๏ฝ„๏ฝ…๏ฝ–๏ฝ๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝ„ใ€€๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„ใ€€๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝ‚๏ฝ“๏ฝƒ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ‚๏ฝ…๏ฝ„ใ€€๏ฝ๏ฝ™๏ฝ“๏ฝ…๏ฝŒ๏ฝ†ใ€€๏ฝ”๏ฝใ€€๏ฝˆ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ผŒใ€€๏ฝˆ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“ใ€€๏ฝƒ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ฝŒ๏ผ›ใ€€๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝ—ใ€€๏ฝ๏ฝใ€€๏ผฉใ€€๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ„๏ผŸใ€€๏ผซ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝใ€€๏ฝ‚๏ฝ…๏ฝ”๏ฝ’๏ฝ๏ฝ™๏ฝ“ใ€€๏ฝ๏ฝ…๏ผŒใ€€๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝ‚๏ฝ“๏ฝƒ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ‚๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ใ€€๏ฝˆ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ“๏ฝ…๏ฝŒ๏ฝ†ใ€€๏ฝ”๏ฝใ€€๏ผฌ๏ผฉ๏ผฆ๏ผฅ๏ผใ€€iโ€™๏ฝใ€€๏ฝ“๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ’๏ฝ™ใ€€๏ผซ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ผŒใ€€๏ฝ‚๏ฝ•๏ฝ”ใ€€๏ผด๏ผจ๏ผฉ๏ผณใ€€๏ผญ๏ผฏ๏ผฎ๏ผด๏ผจใ€€๏ฝ™๏ฝ๏ฝ•ใ€€๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝŽโ€™๏ฝ”ใ€€๏ฝ‡๏ฝ…๏ฝ”๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ใ€€๏ฝ™๏ฝ๏ฝ•๏ฝ’ใ€€๏ฝ„๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ“๏ผŒใ€€๏ผต๏ผฎ๏ผณ๏ผต๏ผข๏ผข๏ผฅ๏ผค๏ผŽ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

This guy's chat is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: โ˜‘ โ€œThis guy's chat is CRAZY!โ€ โ˜‘ โ€œMy mind can't bear seeing retards like thatโ€ โ˜‘ "He NEEDED precisely those two copypastas to infuriate me" โ˜‘ โ€œHe pasted the only ASCII that could annoy meโ€ โ˜‘ "He used the perfect emotes" โ˜‘ โ€œThere was nothing I could do but ignoreโ€ โ˜‘ โ€œI copied that perfectly"
twitch chat
November 2014

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

Mesa sexual identify asa Jar Jar Binks

twitchquotes: Mesa sexual identify asa Jar Jar Binks. Ever since mesa was a boy, mesa being dreamin' to be a humble servant. Boss Nass tellin' me mesa can't bein' sex slave ina Otoh Gunga, but that smells stinkowiff. Mesa meetin' a biga man at duh Naboo, he spekin' he have uh mooey mooey poopa in hesa pants. From deesa day on, mesa will be maxi sex slave on da Naboo. If yousa a bombad and you be thinkin datsa eegad, esqueeze me but yousa how wude. Mesa bein' big thankful to yousa for duh understand.
twitch chat
July 2016
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