[Copypasta] So as a joke, I fucked my friend in a Red M&M cosplay

So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing Red M&M’s wrapper and shoes. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as an M&M and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made mde feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my wrapper. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "It’s that kind of party." He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "What's the matter, can’t resist my chocolaty interior?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "I melt in your mouth, not in your hands!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came. His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'ms till Red M&M."
September 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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OGN's mods

twitchquotes: Hᴇʟʟᴏ OGN, ᴛʜɪs ɪs Hɪᴛʟᴇʀ ᴡʀɪᴛɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ғʀᴏᴍ ʙᴇʏᴏɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ɢʀᴀᴠᴇ. I ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴍᴏᴅs ᴅᴏ ᴀ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴊᴏʙ ᴏғ ᴄᴀʀʀʏɪɴɢ ᴏɴ ᴍʏ ʙᴇʟɪᴇғs.
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March 2014
OGN Hearthstone

some times i supper glue my thumbs

twitchquotes: some times i supper glue my thumbs to my nipples and pretend im a t rex
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June 2018

Classic

Any fellers?

⢣⣈⣼⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣀⡀⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠰⣶⣦⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢹⣿⣿ ⣜⣩⣽⣿⣿⣿⣭⣉⡛⠻⢷⣄⠈⢷⣦⣀⠘⠻⠷⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⣤⣲⠙⠂⣼⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⡇⣼⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡉⢀⣀⣰⠟⠻⢮⣉⠛⠷⠄⢸⣿⣿⢣⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⣿⣿⡉⢰⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⢀⢀⠙⢷⣤⠄⢻⡿⠿⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⢿⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣷⠄⣿⣇⣀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠟⢻⣿⣷⣦⢰⣭⡻⣯⣈⡙⠰⣭⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡣⢃⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⡻⢤⣝⡻⢾⣿⡟⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⡫⢣⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⡙⠻⢿⣧⣭⣀⣀⢁⣀⣾⣿⡿⢟⣵⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠈⠛⠿⠟⢿⣦⣌⣙⣻⣿⡿⣿⣿⠿⣋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⢛⣛⠛⣿⡛⢛⠛⠛⣿⠛⢻⡟⢛⣿ ⣷⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣤⣴⣿⣿⡟⢩⡽⢀⣿⠁⣼⡇⢰⣿⠄⣿⠇⢸⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣿⣶⣿⣷⣾⣾⠶⠶⢀⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠏⢰⣦⣾⣿⣿⣷⠂⣸⣷⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡷⠄⣶⠏⠱⠆⣀⡟⢀⣿⡇⢸⡟⠁⠶⢀⣷⠄⣨⣤⡌⠐⠶⣦⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⡄⠸⠿⣻⡃⠸⢿⠄⠼⣇⠘⠿⢟⡿⠄⣿⣿⠙⠷⠆⣸⣿⣿ ⡟⢛⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2020

I'm not gay but I want to live with Kanye West

I want to live in a log cabin in the woods with Kanye. We won't ever have sex, but there will be a simmering erotic undercurrent as I stand in the kitchen window watching him tighten his ass as he chops wood, shirtless, sweat pouring off his body. I'll run upstairs and masturbate, the entire time forcing myself to think of women while my thoughts drift back to Kanye. I won't be able to climax and I'll eventually go back downstairs, angry. Sometimes we will look across the table and catch each other's eyes, and in that second, anything is possible, but we both deny ourselves and go back to what we were doing. One day one of us will die, and the other will bury him outside the log cabin. Then they'll go inside, pen a brief missive to their departed friend, and commit suicide, never able to deal with life without their one true platonic love.
August 2021

Kanye West

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