[Copypasta] Shit and cum at the same time (from /r/nofap)

Okay I just had the weirdest thing happen to me on my day 2 of no fap, I was taking a shit and struggling to push it out and simultaneously I kid you not I randomly ejaculate as I push my shit out, I’m just sitting there dumbfounded as to why the fuck this happened, there was no pleasure to my shit, nothing strange I wasn’t fapping I swear to god I just randomly….. ejaculated while shitting. WHAT THE FUCK? Anyways mission failed life really hates me lmao
September 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Illuminati confirmed. Get rekt CLG

twitchquotes: FInals being played in MSG. Who else plays in MSG? The Knicks. Who's with the Knicks? Phil Jackson. What is Phil Jackson famous for? 3-peats. What is TSM trying to do today? 3-peat. Illuminati confirmed. Get rekt CLG.
twitch chat
August 2015
Riot Games

League of Legends

Hi I'm Reynad, I run a website called Tempo Storm...

twitchquotes: Hi I'm Reynad, I run a website called Tempo Storm where I post decklists for Hearthstone players to peruse. Don't you dare use them though, or I'll insult you for playing the decks I posted online
twitch chat
November 2015
Reynad

Hearthstone

I am Admiral Akbar, commander of the Somalian Piraterinos

twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

HITLER

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–„β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–“β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–€β–’β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–Œβ–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–’β–€β–“β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

Memes are a very important issue that we face everyday

twitchquotes: I'm here to speak with you about a very important issue that we in the LoL community face everyday, memes. Memes are infiltrating our ranked queues. Memes are infiltrating our in-houses. Memes are raping our mothers and killing our fathers. The World Health Organization has traced the source to a subset of extremely toxic streamers. This group of streamers is led by the one called imaqtpie. If you ever come in contact with imaqtpie, please do a 360 and moonwalk away from his stream. Unfollow and unsubscribe. If you do this, we may still have a chance. I dream of a future where LoL is played in parks and playgrounds, in office and student lounges, and even in the bedroom, completely free of memes. Please support our cause and no pasterini
twitch chat
January 2015
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing