[Copypasta] Shit and cum at the same time (from /r/nofap)

Okay I just had the weirdest thing happen to me on my day 2 of no fap, I was taking a shit and struggling to push it out and simultaneously I kid you not I randomly ejaculate as I push my shit out, I’m just sitting there dumbfounded as to why the fuck this happened, there was no pleasure to my shit, nothing strange I wasn’t fapping I swear to god I just randomly….. ejaculated while shitting. WHAT THE FUCK? Anyways mission failed life really hates me lmao
September 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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FrankerZ

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November 2014

My husband is the moderator for a few different subreddits, and he genuinely thinks it’s a job

my husband refuses to look for a job even though I think it would be good for him (And we could use the additional income), but he just says he’s, “got too much on his plate already”. That being monitoring these stupid subreddits. And Everytime I bring it up he claims what he’s doing is unpaid labor similar to that of a homemaker. But he doesn’t clean or cook or do any of that the way he used to. He just monitors his stupid subreddits. I don’t know what to do. Sometimes I want to leave him because I believe I may not be able to reach him.
November 2021

Reddit

MODS

Sonic and Tails

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣩⣛⠿⣿⣿⣿⢟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣷⣾⣯⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠻⢿⣿⣿⡋⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠏⠀⠀⠈⠻⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⢿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣯⡹⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⣷⣦⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣇⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⣦⡆⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⡇⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻⣧⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠘⠁⠀⠀⠀⠙⠁⠀⠀⠋⠉⠉⢻⣿⡿⠿⠃⠀⠰ ⣿⡟⠉⠈⣿⣿⡏⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⢴⣦⣴⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡁⠀⢰⣿⣿⡇⢼⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣏⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠞⠁⣀⣾⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡇⠀⠘⣿⣿⣧⢸⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⡀⠀⠀⣿⠃⠀⢸⠏⠙⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠠⠄⣀⣈⠛⣃⣴⣏⡙⠛⠛⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣄⣿⣿⣿⣇⠘⠁⠀⢰⣿⠖⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣄⠀⠀⢀⣤ ⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣯⡍⠁⠉⠂⠀⠀⠉⠉⠲⠚⣁⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠟⠋⠉⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⡂⢹⣿⡶⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⠖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣯⠀⠀⢀⠀⠁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣌⣛⣡⣴⡂⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠙⠧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢈⣷⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣀⠀⠱⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
April 2021

Wow, that ACTUALLY killed me?

twitchquotes: ResidentSleeper HUH k ResidentSleeper I'm really strong right now ResidentSleeper Wow, that ACTUALLY killed me? What the fuck ResidentSleeper We played that so bad ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
November 2016
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Rank 25 Casual

twitchquotes: ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮Hey Vegeta, what does the scouter say about Kripp's powerlevel? Its over Rank 25 CASUAL!!! ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing