[Copypasta] Shit and cum at the same time (from /r/nofap)

Okay I just had the weirdest thing happen to me on my day 2 of no fap, I was taking a shit and struggling to push it out and simultaneously I kid you not I randomly ejaculate as I push my shit out, Iโ€™m just sitting there dumbfounded as to why the fuck this happened, there was no pleasure to my shit, nothing strange I wasnโ€™t fapping I swear to god I just randomlyโ€ฆ.. ejaculated while shitting. WHAT THE FUCK? Anyways mission failed life really hates me lmao
September 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Why are you rank 9?

twitchquotes: โ”Œ| โ—” โ–ƒ โ—” |โ” UH KRIPP..... why are you rank 9? โ”Œ| โ—” โ–ƒ โ—” |โ”
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

YUGIOH KEEPS INTERRUPTING MY AD MARATHON

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ“ž ๐Ÿ“ž BabyRage HELLO TWITCH? ๐Ÿ“ž BabyRage THIS YUGIOH THINGY ๐Ÿ“ž BabyRage KEEPS INTERRUPTING ๐Ÿ“ž BabyRage MY AD MARATHON ๐Ÿ“ž BabyRage
twitch chat
October 2017
TwitchPresents

Classic

YuGiOh Ad Marathon

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

twitchquotes: ๐“ก๐“ธ๐“ผ๐“ฎ๐“ผ ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ฎ ๐“ป๐“ฎ๐“ญ. ๐“ฅ๐“ฒ๐“ธ๐“ต๐“ฎ๐“ฝ๐“ผ ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ฎ ๐“ซ๐“ต๐“พ๐“ฎ. ๐“•๐“ธ๐“ป๐“ผ๐“ฎ๐“ท ๐“ฒ๐“ผ ๐“ช ๐“ฏ*๐“ฐ๐“ฐ๐“ธ๐“ฝ ๐”€๐“ฑ๐“ธ ๐“ฌ๐“ช๐“ท ๐“ผ๐“พ๐“ฌ๐“ด ๐“ถ๐”‚ ๐“ญ*๐“ฌ๐“ด
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

Hey Reynad, its me, the lamp behind you

twitchquotes: Hey Reynad, its me, the lamp behind you. Do you remember when you used to turn me on all the time? Now that you're a big time gaming memester, I get as much use as the surfboard and your guitar. I miss you and I hope you use my 29 watts soon
twitch chat
March 2016
Reynad

Trolling My Office With Among Us

There was a meme of a person trolling their school with Among Us. I am doing that to my office.My coworkers were working at their desks and I went up behind one of them. I yelled "When the imposter is sus!" and did the grin (from the meme) and hoped he would get it. He told me to go away so I slapped him and said "SUS! EJECT HIM!" Everybody was looking at me from throughout the office. I said "You're all impostors!" If they don't get the reference they are imposters! I ran over to the douchebag Jerry and smacked him, but he pushed me away and started calling the office. He got on the call but I got on the phone and said "HAHAHA YOU'RE A BIT SUSSY! DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN" like the Among Drip theme song I ran out the door because I don't want to work with a bunch of LOSERS.
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Trolling with Among Us

Text-to-Speech Playing