Okay I just had the weirdest thing happen to me on my day 2 of no fap, I was taking a shit and struggling to push it out and simultaneously I kid you not I randomly ejaculate as I push my shit out, I’m just sitting there dumbfounded as to why the fuck this happened, there was no pleasure to my shit, nothing strange I wasn’t fapping I swear to god I just randomly….. ejaculated while shitting. WHAT THE FUCK? Anyways mission failed life really hates me lmao
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
This offends me as a...
twitchquotes:
This offends me as a vegan transgender hipster Native-American-Indo-Chinese hybrid alien agnostic-atheist German engineer who vapes fairtrade organic decaffeinated compressed and hydrated extra-protein soy breast milk on the regular and does Hindi Kama Sutra naked crossfit yoga 8 days a week.
twitch chat
I am like a boomerang, I will always return
twitchquotes:
Dear nazi mods. you may have permabanned my other account, but shitposting will always find a way. I will lie about how to make faces. I will accuse teams of 322. I will raise my dongers. So don't even waste your time banning me, because I am like a boomerang. I will always return. Pls no copy pasterino dongerino cappucino.
twitch chat
MODS
Kripp sends Hafu a romantic letter
twitchquotes:
Kripp, this is Hafu... Remember when i asked you to unleash your hounds on my freezing trap but instead you gave me an explosive shot to the face with your acidic swamp ooze? While i always love a good multishot to the face... you finished so quickly it fealt like i was having sex with Nozdormu or something... i mean, i am not just some succubus for you to shiv any time you please..
twitch chat
Kripp
If the arms touch your name, you are LIT
twitchquotes:
VAPE TEST. If the arms touch your name, you are LIT ⎝ 
⎠
⎠
twitch chat
Kripp
Chat Test
Exercise caution and stay away from the Subs
twitchquotes:
SECURITY ALERT: A Romanian man, roughly 6'5", skeleton thin, with black hair and scraggly beard has been seen riding the NYC Sub train and violently "Bro-Fisting" passengers. He's accompanied by a short Asian man dressed as Hitler who reputedly cuts out the tongue of anyone who refuses to give him $5. Exercise caution and stay way from the Subs!
twitch chat
Kripp