[Copypasta] Shit and cum at the same time (from /r/nofap)

Okay I just had the weirdest thing happen to me on my day 2 of no fap, I was taking a shit and struggling to push it out and simultaneously I kid you not I randomly ejaculate as I push my shit out, I’m just sitting there dumbfounded as to why the fuck this happened, there was no pleasure to my shit, nothing strange I wasn’t fapping I swear to god I just randomly….. ejaculated while shitting. WHAT THE FUCK? Anyways mission failed life really hates me lmao
September 2021
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Chug jug with you (lyrics)

We got a... 1# Victory Royale, yeah, Fortnite we 'bout to get down (Get down!) Ten kills on the board right now Just wiped out Tomato Town My friend just got downed, I revived him now we're heading southbound Now we're in the Pleasant Park streets, look at the map, go to the marked sheet (Chorus) Take me to your Xbox to play Fortnite today! You can take me to Moisty Mire, but not Loot Lake! I really love to.. Chug Jug with you! We can be pro Fortnite gamers! (End of chorus) He said.. "Hey Broski!", "You got some heals and a shield pot?" "I need healing, and I am only at 1 HP." "Hey dude, sorry!", "I found nothing on this safari." "I checked the upstairs of that house, but not the underneath yet." "There's a chest that's just down there,", "The storm is coming fast and you need heals to prepare!" I've got V-Bucks that I'll spend, more than you can contend. I'm a cool pro Fortnite gamer! Cool.. pro.. Fortnite? (Chorus) Take me to your Xbox to play Fortnite today! You can take me to Moisty Mire, but not Loot Lake! I really love to.. Chug Jug with you! We can be pro Fortnite gamers! (End of chorus) La, la la, la laa ee ya! X2 La, lA AUGHH La laa ee ya! (Will you be my pro Fortnite gamer?) Pro Fortnite Gamer.. Can we get a win this weekend? Take me to Loot Lake! Let's change the game mode and we can Disco Dominate! Let's hop in an ATK, take me to the zone! I'm running kind of low on mats, I need to break some stone! Dressed in all his fancy clothes, He's got Renegade Raider and he's probably a pro! He just shot my back, I turn back and I attack! I just got a Victory Royale, A Victory Royale.. (Chorus) Take me to your Xbox to play Fortnite today! You can take me to Moisty Mire, but not Loot Lake! I really love to.. Chug Jug with you! We can be pro Fortnite gamers! (End of chorus)
March 2021

Fortnite

Don't Care Ratio

dont care + didnt ask + cry about it + stay mad + get real + L + mald seethe cope harder + h0es mad + basic + skill issue + ratio + you fell off + the audacity + triggered + any askers + redpilled + get a life + ok and? + cringe + touch grass + donowalled + not based + your’re probably white + not funny didn’t laugh + you’re* + grammar issue + go outside + get good + reported + ad hominem + GG! + ur momdon’t care + didn’t ask + cry about it + stay mad + get real + L + mald seethe cope harder + hoes mad + basic + skill issue + ratio + you fell off + the audacity + triggered + any askers + redpilled + get a life + ok and? + cringe + touch grass + donowalled + not based + your’re a full time discordian + not funny didn’t laugh + you’re* + grammar issue + go outside + get good + your gay + reported + ad hominem + GG! + ur mom + unknown + random + biased + racially motivated + kys + ur unfunny +ratio don’t care + didn’t ask + cry about it + stay mad + get real + L + mald seethe copedon’t care + didn’t ask + cry about it + stay mad + get real + L + mald seethe cope harder + h0es mad + basic + skill issue + ratio + you fell off + the audacity + triggered + any askers + redpilled + get a life + ok and? + cringe + touch grass + donowalled + not based + your’re probably white + not funny didn’t laugh + you’re* + grammar issue + go outside + get good + reported + ad hominem + GG! + ur momdon’t care + didn’t ask + cry about it + stay mad + get real + L + mald seethe cope harder + hoes mad + basic + skill issue + ratio + you fell off + the audacity + triggered + any askers + redpilled + get a life + ok and? + cringe + touch grass + donowalled + not based + your’re a full time discordian + not funny didn’t laugh + you’re* + grammar issue + go outside + get good + your gay + reported + ad hominem + GG! + ur mom + unknown + random + biased + racially motivated + kys + ur unfunny +ratio don’t care + didn’t ask + cry about it + stay mad + get real + so bad + so ass
May 2022

Ratio

Who Asked?

what happens when you give t1 viagra?

twitchquotes: what happens when you give t1 viagra? he grows taller
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1

abortion is 300$, plan B is 30$, a condom is 5$, but being gay is free

abortion is 300$, plan B is 30$, a condom is 5$, but being gay is free. the choice is yours. Don't bother trying to escape, i've connected a car battery to your balls.
April 2022

Obama

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–€β–“β–“β–Œβ–’β–’β–’ β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–’β–’β–’ β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–’β–„β–„β–“β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–’ β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–’ β–β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–’β–Œβ–’ β–‘β–Œβ–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–„β–ˆβ–„β–Œβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–Œβ–’ β–‘β–β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–€β–€β–β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–“β–’β–’ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–„β–“β–“β–„β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–„β–’β–‘β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–’β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–’β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ– β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–„β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆ
April 2021
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