[Copypasta] Shit and cum at the same time (from /r/nofap)

Okay I just had the weirdest thing happen to me on my day 2 of no fap, I was taking a shit and struggling to push it out and simultaneously I kid you not I randomly ejaculate as I push my shit out, I’m just sitting there dumbfounded as to why the fuck this happened, there was no pleasure to my shit, nothing strange I wasn’t fapping I swear to god I just randomly….. ejaculated while shitting. WHAT THE FUCK? Anyways mission failed life really hates me lmao
September 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Minecraft creeper head

β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ
December 2020

I sexually Identify as tyler1

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as tyler1. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of running it down mid and typing "hehe xd" to boosted animals. People say to me that a beta becoming an alpha god is impossible and that I’m fucking retarded, but I don’t care, I’m an alpha. I’m having an engineer install a McChicken dispenser and an Oreo McFlury maker in my room. From now on I want you guys to call me β€œtyler1” and respect my right to catch axes and flame needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re an dravenphobe and need to check your alpha privilege. hehe xd.
twitch chat
June 2016
Tyler1

I sexually Identify as

League of Legends

HBox’s tag actually has a secret meaning

twitchquotes: fun fact: HBox’s tag actually has a secret meaning. the Box is for his name, Boxuel. the H stands for β€œHjelte” since he plays with the heart of William Peter "Leffen" Hjelte every tourney
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

tyler imo u are the best league of legends player

twitchquotes: tyler imo u are the best league of legends player in the history, you show skills and wits beyond anyone else who played the game, and is improving on a daily basis. you show great promise as long as you keep doing what you're doing right now. cheers
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

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twitchquotes: Day 63: Patient #69 still calls himself "Thijs" and thinks he live in Netherlands. Almost every day he plays a children's magic poker game and talks to the screen, every day he must take a pill but he calls it "T-time". Our doctors will continue monitoring #69.
twitch chat
January 2019
Thijs

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing