[Copypasta] Shit and cum at the same time (from /r/nofap)

Okay I just had the weirdest thing happen to me on my day 2 of no fap, I was taking a shit and struggling to push it out and simultaneously I kid you not I randomly ejaculate as I push my shit out, I’m just sitting there dumbfounded as to why the fuck this happened, there was no pleasure to my shit, nothing strange I wasn’t fapping I swear to god I just randomly….. ejaculated while shitting. WHAT THE FUCK? Anyways mission failed life really hates me lmao
September 2021
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ZULUL 2

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⠏⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⠄⠈⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠈⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣠⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⢀⡀⠄⠤⠤⠤⠤⠄⢠⣀⣤⣍⡻⣿⣧⡀⠤⢀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣵⡇⠄⠈⠁⠄⠄⢒⠄⣀⠄⠠⠘⢨⣈⢿⣿⣿⣤⣤⡚⠫⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠂⠄⣰⣿⣆⢿⠋⣀⣀⣰⡏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣧⠄⣽⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠄⠈⠁⠚⠛⠛⠙⠻⢿⣟⠛⣉⠄⠁⠉⢩⣼⠁⠓⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⣾⣦⣤⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⡷⠉⢀⣿⡏⣼⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠉⠉⣉⠉⣩⠉⡉⠙⠻⣿⣷⡴⠿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠈⠋⠛⠛⠛⠋⠛⠉⠒⠻⠛⠁⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄⠙⠛⠓⠒⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣏⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
December 2018

Your sorry excuse for a job

twitchquotes: Kripp, how does it feel that by me disabling adblock I control whether or not your sorry excuse for a job continues existing
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

This is Catarrian's mother

twitchquotes: Hello Octavian, this is the Catarrian's mother. I am writing to in human words because the Catarrian feels he has been mistreated. He tells me "meow" which means that he feels you are not giving him enough stream time. And he also said "Nyaa," which means you better pet the Catarrian
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

the best way to waste time

twitchquotes: imaqtpie's stream is undoubtedly the best way to waste time. Nothing of value happens here and you can study a real homeless man in preparation for when your life inevitably falls apart as a result
twitch chat
April 2018
imaqtpie

Keep it, you need it more with all that salt

twitchquotes: `So today i was in the supermarket going to buy some cheese for the next week before the stores close, got 8 packages of finest Dutch. When i was waiting in line to pay for it a gentleman in front of me collapsed, his wife looked at us and said "He has Hypoglycemia, someone please bring something that contains sugar!!". I immediately ran to the sweets section, after only 1 minute of choosing since i was in a hurry, i went with ice-cream snickers bar and ran back to the register, with my trembling hands i got rid of the plastic cover, i leaned to the old gentleman, when he turned to me: "I know you..." he said "you are that guy from Twitch... Keep it, you need it more with all that salt..." -Forsen 2015
twitch chat
January 2015
Forsen
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