Yeah I'm a virgin, so what? I'm waiting for the "right one", there's nothing wrong with that. Just because I'm 36 doesn't make it "weird" or make me a "loser". I have standards. I'm not going to give away my state of chastity to some bar/club "whore"; that's just not the kind of guy I am. I require a REAL women that will hold and care for me gently, and who can, above all else, love me for who I am. Once I find that person, I'll happily donate my virginity away. Until then, I am fine being a virgin. Besides, I have a fleshlight, so it's not like I don't know how it feels anyway. Maybe one day you immature keyboard cretins will understand that life isn't about just having sex for the accomplishment, it's about love and finding the "one" to share that experience with.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Birds
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣩⣴⣶⣦⣍⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣌⢻⣿
⣿⣿⣿⢏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣌⢻⣿⣿⣿⠟⣩⣬⣭⠻⣿⣀⣿⣿⣿⢟⣤⡙
⣿⠟⣩⣬⣭⠻⣿⣀⣿⣿⣿⢟⣤⡙⢿⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⡛⠿⣿⣸⣿⣿
⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⡛⠿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣷⣝⠿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⢹⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⠟⣠⣴⣶⣦⣍⠻⡼⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣠⣴⣶⣦⣍⠻⡼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⢏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣝⢿
⣿⣿⣿⢏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣝⢿⣿⣿⠟⣩⣬⣭⠻⣿⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷
⣿⠟⣩⣬⣭⠻⣿⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⡛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⡛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣷⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣍⠻
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣍⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣁⡀
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣁⡀⢀⣠⠄⣠⣶⣶⣿⣿⡗⣠⣴⣶⣦⣍⠻
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠶⠶⠶⠶⠾⠿⠁⢈⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏⣾⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⡈⢉⣩⡭⠽⢛⣒⣒⣒⣈⣿⣿⠟⣩⣬⣭⠻⣿⣀⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣉⣥⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣒⠲⠶⢿⣘⣛⡛⠿⣿
Infinite poop
twitchquotes:
Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can't free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you've broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.
twitch chat
Classic
Boring to watch, boring to play, it's Brawl Day
twitchquotes:
BORING TO WATCH BORING TO PLAY GRAB YOUR PILLOWS ITS BRAWL DAY
BORING TO WATCH BORING TO PLAY GRAB YOUR PILLOWS ITS BRAWL DAY
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Don't even try to compare Xqc to Forsen
twitchquotes:
Don't even try to compare Xqcow to frozen. Xqcow is god, frozen is dog. Xqcow is smart, frozen is a wet shart. Xqcow makes Poggers plays, frozen is a glorified sleep aid. Xqcow is the juicer, frozen is a fruit. Capiche kiddo?
twitch chat
Forsen
This is Catarrian's mother
twitchquotes:
Hello Octavian, this is the Catarrian's mother. I am writing to in human words because the Catarrian feels he has been mistreated. He tells me "meow" which means that he feels you are not giving him enough stream time. And he also said "Nyaa," which means you better pet the Catarrian
twitch chat
Kripp