Fuck this is so embarrassing. I'm literally shaking so hard rn. So like the randy horny mf I am, I was jerking off and edging myself before one of my online classes. Then the class started so I joined. Our teacher's pretty strict and all and expects cameras on at all times. So I just sat there whilst everyone joined, still horny as hell. I had my dick pressed between my legs still. Teacher's going round asking us how the weekend went yada yada. So now it's my turn to speak. I unmute my mic to say my stuff and whilst I'm talking I squeeze my legs a little too hard and come hard as fuck causing to me to literally moan LIKE A FUCKING WHALE and make my horrid contorted orgasm face RIGHT ON FUCKING CAMERA WITH MY MIC UNMUTED WHILST THE ENTIRE CLASS OF 40 STUDENTS ARE WATCHING. LET'S NOT EVEN FORGET THAT MY FACE WAS FULL-SCREEN WHILST I WAS SPEAKING. In a total crazy panic, I leave the class.
I'm dropping that class asap. No, scratch that. Dropping out of college altogether. No way can I go back there again. Might as well drop off this earth while I'm at it.
I used to be a real ad
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Trump nuclear ramble
Look, having nuclearâmy uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at MIT; good genes, very good genes, OK, very smart, the Wharton School of Finance, very good, very smart âyou know, if youâre a conservative Republican, if I were a liberal, if, like, OK, if I ran as a liberal Democrat, they would say Iâm one of the smartest people anywhere in the worldâitâs true!âbut when youâre a conservative Republican they tryâoh, do they do a numberâthatâs why I always start off: Went to Wharton, was a good student, went there, went there, did this, built a fortuneâyou know I have to give my like credentials all the time, because weâre a little disadvantagedâbut you look at the nuclear deal, the thing that really bothers meâit would have been so easy, and itâs not as important as these lives are (nuclear is powerful; my uncle explained that to me many, many years ago, the power and that was 35 years ago; he would explain the power of whatâs going to happen and he was rightâwho would have thought?), but when you look at whatâs going on with the four prisonersânow it used to be three, now itâs fourâbut when it was three and even now, I would have said itâs all in the messenger; fellas, and it is fellas because, you know, they donât, they havenât figured that the women are smarter right now than the men, so, you know, itâs gonna take them about another 150 yearsâbut the Persians are great negotiators, the Iranians are great negotiators, so, and they, they just killed, they just killed us.
Donald Trump
When you copy messages don't copy the name
DONT COPY THE I'VE GOT THE STREAM IN MY SIGHTS
twitchquotes:
ŕźźŕşŮÍŕşŕź˝ďžÂˇď¸ťĚˇâťĚżââä¸I'VE GOT THE STREAM IN MY SIGHTS
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strifecro
If you can press ctrl+v you can have dongers anytime!
twitchquotes:
áââáââá Dongers in the morning, dongers in the evening, dongers at suppertime. If you can press ctrl+v you can have dongers anytime! áââáââá
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Kripp
I want to fuck the Samsung girl
Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad Iâve done nothing but think about her. I canât go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. Iâve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I canât stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I canât complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I canât live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as Iâll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this Iâve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldnât want it any other way.