[Copypasta] I orgasmed during an online zoom class

Fuck this is so embarrassing. I'm literally shaking so hard rn. So like the randy horny mf I am, I was jerking off and edging myself before one of my online classes. Then the class started so I joined. Our teacher's pretty strict and all and expects cameras on at all times. So I just sat there whilst everyone joined, still horny as hell. I had my dick pressed between my legs still. Teacher's going round asking us how the weekend went yada yada. So now it's my turn to speak. I unmute my mic to say my stuff and whilst I'm talking I squeeze my legs a little too hard and come hard as fuck causing to me to literally moan LIKE A FUCKING WHALE and make my horrid contorted orgasm face RIGHT ON FUCKING CAMERA WITH MY MIC UNMUTED WHILST THE ENTIRE CLASS OF 40 STUDENTS ARE WATCHING. LET'S NOT EVEN FORGET THAT MY FACE WAS FULL-SCREEN WHILST I WAS SPEAKING. In a total crazy panic, I leave the class. I'm dropping that class asap. No, scratch that. Dropping out of college altogether. No way can I go back there again. Might as well drop off this earth while I'm at it.
September 2021
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Kripp's salt

β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–β–Œβ–„β–€β–Œβ–β–Œβ–„β–β–Œβ–„β–β–Œβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’ β–’β–’β–β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–„β–€β–Œβ–€β–„β–Œβ–β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–β–β–Œβ–β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–β–ˆβ–ˆ β–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–“β–“β–“β–’β–ˆβ–€β–€β–β–β–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–‘β–“β–“β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’
ascii art
November 2014
Kripp

Surprised bird

β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–’β–’β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–’β–β–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–„β–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–€β–’β–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–Œβ–’β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–„β–€β–’β–Œ β–‘β–€β–„β–β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–Œβ–€β–€β–‘β–€β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–β–ˆβ–€β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–„ β–‘β–Œβ–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„
ascii art
January 2017

I hate MORBIUS. I HATE IT

Oh for the love of God. Enough with the MORBIUS. What’s even the joke???? β€œHahahaha hey guys the movie sucks but I pretend it’s good”???? THATS NOT EVEN A FUCKING JOKE. Holy shit my dick is going to fall out of its foreskin if I have to hear, β€œhehe it’s morbin time” ONE MORE TIME. Not only is it NOT funny, IT DOESNT EVEN MAKE SENSE. THE POWER RANGERS HAVENT BEEN RELEVANT IN DECADES. MORBIUS SUCKS THE MOVIE IS COMPLETE TRASH AND IM ASHAMED TO HAVE SPENT MONEY ON IT. You know…. I never would have seen the movie without all of these β€œmemes”(unfunny shitposts). I would have been a MUCH HAPPIER PERSON. So fuck your β€œMORBIUS” your β€œmighty morbin more morbs morbidly MORBIUS BULLSHIT” NO ONE CARES, YOU ARENT FUNNY. Does not a singular human being have any independent thought anymore???? β€œMorb morb morb morb” you’re like a BUNCH OF SEAGULLS. SEA GULLS. What the FUCK does β€œmorbin” even mean????? ITS NOT A WORD. ITS JUST GOBBLE GOOP. I feel like I am the last truly sentient human being on earth. IM BEING DRIVEN TO THE BRINK OF INSANITY. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. TAKE YOUR MORBIUS BULLSHIT, SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS, AND GO OUTSIDE. Maybe if you went outside you could get β€œmorb” bitches on your dick??!!! YOU LIKE THAT, YOU SEE WHAT YOUVE REDUCED ME INTO. I am a shell of a man and all of you collectively are to blame.This meme has spread like a debilitating illness AND I CANT GET AWAY FROM IT. THE FALL OF WESTERN SOCIETY IS HERE AND THIS COMPLETE UNFUNNY DRIBBLE OF A MEME IS PART OF THE PROBLEM. WHAT THE FUCK DOES β€œgETtiNg MoRBed” EVEN MEAN. it makes ZERO SENSE. ITS JUST GIBBERISH. FUCKING GIBB ER ISH. ITS NOT FUNNY. Saying β€œmorb” LIKE ITS ITS OWN PUNCHLINE IS NOT COMEDY. IT IS COMEDIC AND CULTURAL DEGRADATION. Are we really so stunted as a generation that even the mention of any word that starts with m-o-r-b is FUNNY??? IN WHAT FUCKING UNIVERSE. Is it funny because it isn’t funny because praising something bad is now good??????? HOW MANY LAYERS OF IRONY DO WE NEED. HOW FAR DOES THE RABBIT HOLE GO. This website has stripped me of EVERY LAST BRAINCELL. GOING ON REDDIT FEELS LIKE IM GETTING A SUPER HERO INDUCED LOBOTOMY. I hate MORBIUS. I HATE IT. I know I’m just going to get FLOODED WITH β€œget morbed, this guy got morbed, what morb does to a man” HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHQHQHAHAHAHAHAHWHHSHWBSQIISHWINSIQKSBDD SSSSOOOOOOOOOOOO FUNNNNNNNNYYYYYYY AGAGAGGAGHHHHHHHHH
July 2022

Morbius

"When the Impostor is sus" but formal

When the person who pretends to be someone else in order to deceive others, especially for fraudulent gain is giving the impression that something is questionable or dishonest, causing one to have the idea or impression that they are of questionable, dishonest, or dangerous character or condition.
March 2022

Among Us / Amogus

ARTOSIS, ATTEND ME!

twitchquotes: ( ΰΈ‡ Ν Β° ΝŸΚ– Ν‘Β°)ΰΈ‡ ARTOSIS, ATTEND ME! (ΰΈ‡ Ν Β° ΝŸΚ– Ν‘Β°)ΰΈ‡ (ΰΈ‡ β—‰β—‘β—”)ΰΈ‡ READY, SIR (ΰΈ‡ β—‰β—‘β—”)ΰΈ‡
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
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