[Copypasta] Dear people who comment on porn

Dear people who comment on porn, why? Do you really think whoever the fuck you’re masturbating to will see “you are gorgeous I would love to tittyfuck you, it would be my pleasure😍😍😍” will fly over to your house have sex with your fatass and then fly back? No. If it ever actually does happen, I’d bet that pornstar does it a lot. Which means constant flying. Porn commenters are causing global warming.
September 2021
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Nice opinion, but it's wrong

Nice opinion, just one tiny problem with it. Inspecting your post, it looks like your opinion is different from mine. Let me tell you something, I am the baseline for opinions. Any opinion I hold is objectively correct and as a result, any other opinions are wrong. Guess what? You happen to hold the wrong one! I hope you know that your opinion is now illegal. I have contacted the FBI, CIA, the NSA, the navy seals, secret service, and your mom. You'll be sorry you ever shared your opinions, by the time you're reading this, you'll be done for. Nature will punish you. Humanity will punish you. supernatural beings will punish you. Space will punish you. We decided just to make sure we'll nuke your house from orbit. So there's no chance you can run away, everyone will know you will die. It's a small price to pay, to remove your wrong opinion from this world.
January 2022

Spider

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⡙⢿⣿⣦⡙⠻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡉⠛⠓⠢⡈⢿⡿⠁⣸⣿⡿⠿⢋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣍⣙⡋⠠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠘⠁⠄⠴⠚⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡴⠖⠒⠄⠁⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⣩⣴⣶⣿⣿⣶⡞⠉⣠⣇⠄⣿⣶⣦⣄⡀⠲⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢠⣿⣿⣿⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣌⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢡⣿⣿⣿⡏⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
January 2019

Tuck Frump

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░▀█▀░█░░█░█▀▀░█░█▀░░░░░ ░░░░░█░░█░░█░█░░░█▀▄░░░░░░ ░░░░░▀░░▀▀▀▀░▀▀▀░▀░▀▀░░░░░ ░░█▀▀░█▀█░█░░█░█▄░▄█░█▀█░░ ░░█▀▀░██▀░█░░█░█░▀░█░█▀▀░░ ░░█░░░█░█░█▄▄█░█░░░█░█░░░░
November 2014
Forsen

Can you take it easy with your complaints about Flamestrike?

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. Can you take it easy with your complaints about Flamestrike? My friend is a developer at Blizzard and he invented Flamestrike. He has been getting spam letters in the mail threatening to "brofist" him. These spammers claim to be "insane" and "crazy" and "have exactly what they need to beat him." I am worried for him, please help. Thanks man.
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

no mods

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣻⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣡⣤⣬⣿⣿⣛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠷⠂⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⢃⣾⣿⣍⣴⡆⠄⢠⣍⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⢡⡀⠄⠠⠄⠄⠈⢻⣿ ⣿⡿⠉⠐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠓⠄⠠⣶⣶⣶⣿⠇⢸⣿ ⡿⠄⠠⣤⣽⣿⣿⣍⣠⣤⣤⣭⣬⣭⣿⣿⣯⣤⣄⡀⠄⣀⡀⣠⣭⡤⠄⣸⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⡜⢋⣼⣿⠟⠄⣰⣿⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠙⢿⣿ ⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹ ⣿⡿⡿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⢿⡿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⢿⠉⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⢠⠄⣿⡇⢰⡄⢹⣿⣿⡇⢠⠄⣤⠈⣿⠄⣦⠈⣿⠁⣤⠄⣿⣀⠂⢼⣿ ⣿⣧⣼⣤⣿⣧⣬⣤⣿⣿⣿⣧⣼⣤⣿⣤⣿⣤⣥⣴⣿⣤⣤⣤⣿⣤⣥⣼⣿
December 2020

MODS

Text-to-Speech Playing