[Copypasta] Kangaroos vs Uruguayans

This does not change the fact that in Australia there are 48 million kangaroos and in Uruguay there are 3,457,380 inhabitants. So if the kangaroos decide to invade Uruguay, each Uruguayan will have to fight 14 kangaroos...
October 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Nazi doge

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ– โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–Œ โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œ โ–€โ–’โ–€โ–โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–Œโ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’
November 2014

Champion M&M

twitchquotes: Sometimes, whenever i eat M&Ms, i like to hold two m&ms in between my fingers and squeeze as hard as i can until one m&m cracks. I eat the cracked one and the one that didn't crack becomes champion, then i grab another m&m and force it to compete with the champion in this deadly game of m&m gladiators. I do this until i run out of m&ms, and when there is one left standing i send a letter to m&ms brand with the champion in it and a note attached that reads "please use this m&m for breeding purposes"
twitch chat
August 2014

Hey chat, here's a high five for you

twitchquotes: (โ—žโ‰ผโ—‰เธทโ‰ฝโ—Ÿ ;็›Š;โ—žโ‰ผโ—‰เธทโ‰ฝโ—Ÿ) โ•ญโˆฉโˆฉโˆฉโˆฉโˆฉโ•ฎ HEY CHAT HERE'S A HIGH FIVE FOR YOU (โ—žโ‰ผโ—‰เธทโ‰ฝโ—Ÿ ;็›Š;โ—žโ‰ผโ—‰เธทโ‰ฝโ—Ÿ) โ•ญโˆฉโˆฉโˆฉโˆฉโˆฉโ•ฎ
twitch chat
November 2014

I have a really small keyboard

twitchquotes: สฐแต‰หกแต– แตแต‰ แถœสฐแตƒแต— แดต สฐแตƒแต›แต‰ แตƒ สณแต‰แตƒหกหกสธ หขแตแตƒหกหก แตแต‰สธแต‡แต’แตƒสณแตˆ แตƒโฟแตˆ แดต'แต หขแต—แต˜แถœแต แต—สธแต–แถฆโฟแต หกแถฆแตแต‰ แต—สฐแถฆหข
twitch chat
August 2020

I fucking hate Stuart Little

twitchquotes: I fucking hate Stuart Little. I know what youโ€™re thinking, this is some kind of funny joke, but no. Stuart Little is a piece of shit. A damn rat got picked over actual children at an orphanage and heโ€™s supposed to be a hero? And I canโ€™t even tell you how many damn times Iโ€™ve seen a great parking space only to turn the corner and realise Stuart Little is already parked there in his stupid little fucking convertible. He took my wife and the kids and my house and my job. I swear to fucking god, Iโ€™m going to kill myself and take that goddamn rodent to hell with me. Stuart Little has ruined my family. Last summer, I approached the miserable mouse in the street, and asked him for his autograph, because my son is a huge fan. The fucking rat gave me the autograph and told me to burn in hell. Later, when I gave my son the autograph he started crying and said he hated me. Turns out the mousefucker didnt write his autograph, no, he wrote โ€œyouโ€™re a piece of shit, and i fucked your momโ€. Iโ€™m now divorced, and planning a huge class-action lawsuit against the white devil that ruined my life. Your time is almost over, Stuart. All the people youโ€™ve wronged will rise against you.
twitch chat
May 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing