[Copypasta] Kangaroos vs Uruguayans

This does not change the fact that in Australia there are 48 million kangaroos and in Uruguay there are 3,457,380 inhabitants. So if the kangaroos decide to invade Uruguay, each Uruguayan will have to fight 14 kangaroos...
October 2021
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Spoilers in Twitch Chat

twitchquotes: Keep sharing spoilers guys! Those shows seem so interesting, I'm so glad I'm reading all these spoilers. What about some Game of Thrones spoilers now? How hard can you spoil it?
twitch chat
April 2014
Reynad

Rainbow Dash

β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–Œβ–“β–€ β–“β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–“β–“ β–“β–’β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“ β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“ β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–’β–’β–“β–“ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–’β–“β–“ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ ▓▒▒▒▒▒▓░░░░░░░▐▄░▓▓▓▓▓▓ β–“β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“
November 2014

Reporting a streamer named "TSM_Kripp"

twitchquotes: Hello twitch admins. I am here to report a streamer named "TSM_Kripp". She is currently violating the new twitch rules, and is constantly moaning suggestively in her stream. I am trying to watch her game but she just keeps yelling "TOPDICK" or "INSANE" after she gets rekt. Please take action against her as soon as you can. Thank you.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Teaching him how to throw so well

twitchquotes: Hey xQc my son is a huge fan of yours. Anyway over the past few days of watching you play this game hes got much better at playing baseball (he plays in the 11-13 year old division). I just wanted to stop by and thank you for teaching him how to throw so well.
twitch chat
October 2018
xQcOW

Overwatch

I hate JoJo

I fucking hate JoJo. Every subreddit I go through has a vermin-like underclass of JoJo fanboys. They all just have to say β€œiS THat A JOJo ReFErEncE??!!!1” on every fucking post that contains a single word that may have been used in the shitty comics. Oh, a suspicious link? Probably a rickroll. NOPE!!! They’ve ruined that, too! One of the oldest goddamn internet traditions shat on and ruined by JoJo fanboys. Thunder Cross Split Attack! So fucking funny, right? I’m wheezing! NO. SHUT THE FUCK UP. Nobody cares about your shitty comic series. Dio is a stupid character from a stupid comic series. I downvote every post and comment that mentions JoJo, out of pure bloodcurdling rage. I want to detonate a MASSIVE thermonuclear warhead right on top of whatever godforsaken studio publishes that stinking-pile-of-trash comic. Frankly, I don’t even care for the civilian casualties, either. At least they died for a good reason. Unlike JoJo fans, I actually contribute to the betterment of mankind, instead of spamming shitty references on the internet. Every JoJo fan that dies a slow, painful death is a win in my book. I have claimed over a dozen of them already, too. I annihilated their skulls with my fists. Their stupid ice attack didn’t do shit for them either. They dies like they lived, pathetic excuses for humans. I hope more people hear my message and declare war on JoJo. If nobody helps me, I will do as much damage as I possibly can before I die. Thank you.
February 2021

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

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