[Copypasta] Alien through telescope

twitchquotes: AlienPls ⠀ ﾟ⠀*⠀ ｡⠀ ⠀ﾟ⠀｡ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ☆⠀ ⠀★⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ･ﾟ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ★⠀ ｡･⠀⠀⠀ﾟ⠀⠀｡⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ★⠀ ⠀ ･･⠀⠀ ⠀ ∴⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ﾟ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ *⠀ﾟ⠀⠀⠀★⠀⠀⠀ ｡･⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀I CANT BELIEVE MY EYES 🔭 OMEGALUL 󠀀 󠀀
twitch chat
October 2021
I used to be a real ad
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A severe lack of cute emotes in chat

twitchquotes: Konichiwa Kripp-kun AYAYA . This is your kawaii kouhai Aya-chan, calling in from Nihon. I have noticed a severe lack of cute emotes in chat tonight, and instead all I see are baka dansgame and baka nammers. This is not very sugoi, and I would appreciate it if your chat showed more respect for Japanese culture by typing kawaii emotes like AYAYA and AstolfoSmile . Arigato gozaimasu <3
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Weebs

Classic

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
January 2021

Classic

WallStreetBets

What is inside that taco? Reynad's tournament wins

twitchquotes: TBTacoLeft TBTacoRight WHAT IS INSIDE THAT TACO TBTacoLeft TBCheesePull 0 TBCheesePull TBTacoRight OH NO IT'S REYNAD'S TOURNAMENT WINS LUL
twitch chat
May 2016
Reynad

Classic

Hearthstone

Mario poops mods

░░░░░░░░░▓▓▓▓▀█░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░▄▀▓▓▄██████▄░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░▄█▄█▀░░▄░▄░█▀░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░▄▀░██▄░░▀░▀░▀▄░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░▀▄░░▀░▄█▄▄░░▄█▄░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░▀█▄▄░░▀▀▀█▀░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░▄▀▀░▐░░░░░░░░ ░░░░▄▀░░░░░░░░▐░▄▄▀░░░░░░░░░ ░░▄▀░░░▐░░░░░█▄▀░▐░░░░░░░░░░ ░░█░░░▐░░░░░░░░▄░█░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░█▄░░▀▄░░░░▄▀▐░█░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░█▐▀▀▀░▀▀▀▀░░▐░█░░░░░░░░░░ ░░▐█▐▄░░▀░░░░░░▐░█▄▄░░░░░░░░ ░░░▀▀░MODS░░░░▐▄▄▄▀░░░░░░░░░
ascii art
January 2017

MODS

Classic

What in Davy Jones’ locker did ye just bark at me?

twitchquotes: What in Davy Jones’ locker did ye just bark at me, ye scurvy bilgerat? I’ll have ye know I be the meanest cutthroat on the seven seas, and I’ve led numerous raids on fishing villages.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
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