[Copypasta] My parents used to watch cockfighting in the bedroom

My parents used to watch cockfighting in the bedroom when they thought we were asleep. I'd hear my mother excitedly talking about how much she enjoyed cocks as they jumped around on the bed. What surprised me though was, when we went to Spain she mentioned how cruel she thought bullfighting was. I never confronted her about the hypocrisy though.
October 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Auto-Pay feature

twitchquotes: Hello Octavian Kripparrian, Marvel Future Fight devs here. We have noticed you have used our "Auto-Play" functionality extensively today, with much better results than when you played the game yourself. Because of this success, we are happy to announce another brand-new feature: "Auto-Pay". We have seen you spend a large amount of time inefficiently upgrading your character, and this time is better spent Auto-Playing. Please click the "Auto-Pay" button, and let your Credit Card do the work!
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

sellout

Classic

ass or tits?

On the question on the preference of either the buttocks or the breasts, the very nature is complex to answer for both of those body parts complement each other quite swimmingly, and even moreso when we bring the thighs into the situation. As such, it is difficult for I to answer for the buttocks and breasts - or the "ass" and "titties", as it were - are both equally attractive. Though if I was to give an answer, I would have to say that as much as I quite fancy the breasts, I will have to pick the buttocks and the thighs as my final answer. And if you will allow me to do so, I would also like to add feet as a heavy bonus.
August 2021

HITLER

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–„β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–“β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–€β–’β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–Œβ–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–’β–€β–“β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

We are not the same (Amogus edition)

We are not the same For instance You say kid πŸ‘¦ we say mini-crewmate You say earth 🌎 we say Mira-hq You say suspiciousπŸ₯·, we say sussy bakas You say β€œhe was murdered so I called the police”, we say β€œEMERGENCY MEETING” You say β€œthe joke is dead” we say Among us poop mod 2021 (still working) (free) (not click bait)
April 2022

Among Us / Amogus

Big shoutout to NA LCS

twitchquotes: Big shoutout to NA LCS. My mother has sleep anxiety problems, but on weekends she sleeps like a bear. All I ask of her is to watch 10 minutes of NA LCS.
twitch chat
July 2015
Riot Games

Classic

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Text-to-Speech Playing