[Copypasta] We should buy Reddit

We should buy Reddit. Not the stock. The actual company. If we all get together and own 51% then we will own this entire website. We could make the rules, profit from the advertising, and finally get paid for the memes we make. I've even come up with a list of things we could do as new owners: Reddit mods can apply for paid-internships at Reddit. This is much closer to having a real job than what they currently do and would benefit the organization. Your flair is your official title at the company. IE: instead of "CFO" you'll be "PotatoFart" NSFW posts will receive special protections--and if you happen to work in our new skyscraper then NSFW posts are automatically considered SFW. Everyone gets a turn in the corporate jet. Elon becomes a mod. He can also apply to become a paid intern. We have a monthly party on our company yacht: The S.S. VisualMod. Our corporate cafeteria is a dining hall with fast food restaurants along the side--but they're all Wendy's. I think this is a great idea. Keep it high and tight. 👖🚀👖🚀👖🚀
December 2021

WallStreetBets

Reddit

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/rjjecq/we_should_buy_reddit/
I used to be a real ad
More Reddit Copypastas

Win any online argument by replying with this

Don't care + didn't ask + L + Ratio + soyjak + beta + cringe + stfu + cope + seethe + ok boomer + incel + virgin + Karen + 🤡🤡🤡 + you are not just a clown, you are the entire circus + 💅💅💅 + nah this ain't it + do better + check your privilege + pronouns in bio + anime pfp + 🤢🤢🤮🤮 + the cognitive dissonance is real with this one + small dick energy + 😂😂🤣🤣 + lol copium + snowflake + 🚩🚩🚩 + those tears taste delicious + Lisa Simpson meme template saying that your opinion is wrong + 😒🙄🧐🤨 + wojak meme in which I'm the chad + average your opinion fan vs average my opinion enjoyer + random k-pop fancam + cry more + how's your wife's boyfriend doing + Cheetos breath + Intelligence 0 + r/whooooosh + r/downvotedtooblivion + blocked and reported + yo Momma so fat + I fucked your mom last night + what zero pussy does to a mf + Jesse what the fuck are you talking about + holy shit go touch some grass + cry about it + get triggered
November 2021

Reddit

I just downvoted your comment FAQ (Reddit)

I just downvoted your comment. # FAQ ## What does this mean? The amount of karma (points) on your comment and Reddit account has decreased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be unworthy of positive or neutral karma. These include, but are not limited to: • ⁠Rudeness towards other Redditors, • ⁠Spreading incorrect information, • ⁠Sarcasm not correctly flagged with a /s. ## Am I banned from the Reddit? No - not yet. But you should refrain from making comments like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to issue an additional downvote, which may put your commenting and posting privileges in jeopardy. ## I don't believe my comment deserved a downvote. Can you un-downvote it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I undo a downvote. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a private message explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to Reddit PMs within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of downvote appeals are rejected, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the downvote and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will not be tolerated on Reddit.com. I will continue to issue downvotes until you improve your conduct. Remember: Reddit is privilege, not a right.
March 2021

Classic

Reddit

Reddit is a privilege, not a right

I just downvoted your thread. # FAQ: ## What does this mean? The amount of karma (points) on your thread and Reddit account has decreased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be unworthy of positive or neutral karma. These include, but are not limited to: Rudeness towards other Redditors, Spreading incorrect information, Sarcasm not correctly flagged with a /s. Trump. ## Am I banned from the Reddit? No - not yet. But you should refrain from making comments like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to issue an additional downvote, which may put your commenting and posting privileges in jeopardy. ## I don't believe my comment deserved a downvote. Can you un-downvote it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I undo a downvote. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot me a private message explaining what I got wrong. I tend to respond to Reddit PMs within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of downvote appeals are rejected, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the downvote and move on. But learn from this mistake: your behavior will not be tolerated on Reddit.com. I will continue to issue downvotes until you improve your conduct. Remember: Reddit is a privilege, not a right.
December 2020

Reddit

I hate Reddit's new avatars

They look so incomprehensibly fucking STUPID. WHO CAME UP WITH THEM? I liked the old avatars, they were simple and friendly. Now every time, EVERY. SINGLE. FUCKING. TIME. I look at someone's username, I see this ugly little shit, an abomination. Makes me almost fucking VOMIT. THEY LOOK SO DAMN STUPID I'M FUCKING TIRED OF KT. IT LOOKS LIKE AN ALIEN HAD SEX WITH A COCKROACH, THEN WORE SOME UGLY SHIRT AND PANTS. THE REDDIT CREATURE DUDES ARENT SUPPOSED TO BE WEARING THIS STUPID ABOMINABLD SHIT. I HATE it. I want to BURN IT WITH FIRE. Sadly you can't burn JPGs. BUT EVERY TIME I SEE ONE IT MAKES ME WANT TO CRY AT FUCKING SPEZ
September 2021

Reddit

I just nutted to your comment FAQ (Reddit)

I just nutted to your comment. # FAQ ## What does this mean? The amount of cum (semen) on my phone and Reddit phone has increased by one. ## Why did you do this? There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be worthy of cum. These include, but are not limited to: • ⁠you being a femboy, • ⁠Spreading sti infections, • ⁠Sarcasm correctly flagged with a /s. ## Am I banned from the Reddit? No. But you should make comments like this in the future. Otherwise I will be forced to not cum. ## I don't believe my comment deserved a nut. Can you un-nut to it? Sure, mistakes happen. But only in exceedingly rare circumstances will I undo a nut. If you would like to issue an appeal, shoot your nut on me. I tend to respond to Being shot with nut within several minutes. Do note, however, that over 99.9% of nut appeals are rejected, and yours is likely no exception. ## How can I prevent this from happening in the future? Accept the nut and move on. your behavior will be nutted to on Reddit.com. I will continue to nut until you stop being so hot 😩 Remember: I’m horny uwu
June 2021

Reddit

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