[Copypasta] ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my p***s was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
December 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Kripp's salt

β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–β–Œβ–„β–€β–Œβ–β–Œβ–„β–β–Œβ–„β–β–Œβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’ β–’β–’β–β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–„β–€β–Œβ–€β–„β–Œβ–β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–β–β–Œβ–β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–β–ˆβ–ˆ β–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–“β–“β–“β–’β–ˆβ–€β–€β–β–β–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–‘β–“β–“β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’
ascii art
November 2014
Kripp

Sir you have been found with Rocket League hacks

twitchquotes: Sir you have been found with Rocket League hacks. A SWAT team is on the way to your location. Make sure the door is open, otherwise they are ready to break it down. Don't destroy any evidence and don't contact your accomplices! Prepare disks, flash drives and any other multimedia devices containing illegal materials, proving your criminality. Be prepared to answer the questions during your interrogation! Cooperate and don't deny the charges against you.
twitch chat
June 2019

Racoon

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⑿⒉⣴⣢⣀⠀⣿⣿ β‘Ώβ’›β£‰β£‰β£‰β£‰β‘›β »β Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ώβ ›β£‘β£΄β β β €β‘šβ €β’Έβ£Ώ β β£Ώβ ‰β’€β‘‰β ‰β’Ώβ£·β£„β ˆβ ‰β β£ β£€β£€β‘€β£€β£€β£€β£΄β ‚β’Ίβ §β €β €β €β €β €β£Ύβ£Ώ β €β’·β£€β €β €β €β ˆβ ™β£·β €β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ’Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ ƒβ  β’„β£€β’€β‘΄β €β£ β£Ύβ£Ώβ£Ώ β£§β ˆβ £β£¦β €β €β €β €β ‰β Έβ ›β ƒβ ‰β ‹β Ήβ €β ƒβ β €β €β €β Ίβ£Ÿβ£·β£¦β£„β ™β Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ β£Ώβ£‡β’ˆβ’Ώβ£·β£Ύβ£¦β‘€β’΄β£Ώβ£Άβ‘€β’ β£”β£€β£€β‘€β €β ²β£Ύβ£Ώβ£Άβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£·β£„β ˆβ’» β£Ώβ β£ β£Ύβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ώβ Ώβ‘»β£Ώβ €β ˜β Ώβ‘Ÿβ ‘β „β’‰β‘Όβ’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£¦β ˆ β‘β£¨β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ÿβ‘β β ƒβ ˆβ €β β €β €β£€β’ β‘€β£Ύβ ƒβ €β ‰β ›β ›β’  β β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ β β ˜β Ώβ£Άβ£€β ΄β Άβ’Ÿβ£°β£Άβ£Ύβ£Ώβ£·β£€β£€β €β €β €β €β£ β£Ύ β‘€β’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ ‹β β €β €β €β €β ‰β β’ β£΄β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ’Ώβ£Ÿβ Ώβ£Ώβ‘†β €β’€β£Ύβ£Ώβ£Ώ β£·β‘„β ›β Ÿβ ƒβ €β €β €β €β €β €β’ β£€β£Άβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘ƒβ ˆβ β €β ˜β£‘β£Ύβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Άβ£€β£€β£€β£„β£€β£€β£€β£€β£€β£ˆβ£›β£‰β£‰β‘™β ‹β ‹β β €β’€β£ β£Ύβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώ
ascii art
January 2020

I sexually Identify as Kripp

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as Kripp. Ever since i was a boy , I dreamed about playing kid's card game while complaining about RNG for a living. People say that being kripp isn't possible I'm ****** Retarded , but I don't care ,I'm beatiful. I'm having a crappy computer setup installed in my house , along with marrying a woman I can force to do all my cooking so I can complain twice as efficiently , If you don't accept me you're a Krippophobe and need to check your Krippileges
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

He knew he was a sellout

twitchquotes: On November 10th, 2014, Octavian "Kripparian" Morosan was found to be severely delusional. He began wandering around his home, mumbling 'brofist' and 'subscribe'. As his weak fist was placed gently on the webcam, a single tear ran down his cheek. He knew he was a sellout.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

sellout

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