[Copypasta] ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my p***s was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
December 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

For the blind, it is light

twitchquotes: Who is [streamer name]? 🤔 For the blind, 🦇 it is light. 💡 For the hungry 😣 , it is bread. 🍞 For the sick, 💉 it is the cure. ⚕️ For the sad 😢 , it is joy. 😂 For the poor 🚫💰 , it is the treasure; 💰 ⛏️ for the debtor ➖ 💰 , it is forgiveness. 🙏 For the face 😶 , it is the lips 👄
twitch chat
October 2021

I thought, I thought you streamed for me

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀsᴛ ʏᴏᴜ'ʟʟ ʙᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴍᴇ. ᴛʜᴇsᴇ ɴᴇᴡ ᴇᴍᴏᴛᴇs ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄᴇᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴀɴᴏᴛʜᴇʀ sᴇʟʟ─ᴏᴜᴛ. ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ᴅɪғғᴇʀᴇɴᴛ ᴛʜᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇsᴛ. ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍᴇᴅ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴠɪᴇᴡᴇʀs... ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ, ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍᴇᴅ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ. ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ's ᴏᴠᴇʀ, ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ. ɢᴏᴏᴅʙʏᴇ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Trolling My Office With Among Us (Part 2)

When I went into the office the next day everybody ignored me. So I walked up to a coworker and said "Hey, why are you ignoring me, you're a bit sussy!" He reached for the red phone and I was reminded it looked like the Among us character. So I said "When the phone is sus hahahahhah" and I did the Linus tech tips disappointed face. "Get it? Do you use reddit?" He was talking to management when I cut the phone cord and threw it across the office. I said "Red was the imposter! hahahah!" And I did the among us drip song. "Ding ding ding ding ding, ding ding ding!" He wasn't smiling and he punched me but I said "You're sus! You're the imposter I saw you vent!" He was angry and he tried to punch me again but I grabbed his fist and said "Omae wa mo shinderu." He tried to punch me again he is a loser! He didn't even get my anime reference. So I took off my pants and shoved them on my his head. "You just got pantsed! HAhahahah" and I did the pepe smile and ran out of the office. Who wants to talk to an IMPOSTER? Stupid bitch
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Trolling with Among Us

Adapt created, quest activated, now we Jebaited

twitchquotes: Jebaited BATTLECRY OUTDATED Jebaited DISCOVERY OVERRATED Jebaited ADAPT CREATED Jebaited QUEST ACTIVATED Jebaited LONG HAVE WE WAITED Jebaited NOW WE JEBAITED Jebaited
twitch chat
February 2017

Hearthstone

UR DONGIN A GRET JOB KROPP

twitchquotes: ヽ(◉◡◔)ノ UR DONGIN A GRET JOB KROPP ヽ(◉◡◔)ノ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing