[Copypasta] โš ๏ธ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my p***s was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
December 2021
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twitchquotes: qtpie, I just want to let you know that I disable adblock for your stream because I want to support you. However, due to you running ads DURING A GAME, I have now decided to re-enable adblock.
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November 2014
imaqtpie

Blue Lives Matter (Smurfs)

blue people don't exist. this is offensive. i have never in my life met a blue person. SMURFS ARENT REAL GUYS. IM TIRED OF SEEING THIS BLUE LIVES MATTER, SMURFS ARE NOT REAL THERE ARE NO BLUE PEOPLE. and even if they were real, they do not matter. i hate smurfs. theyre ugly and short. i could step on them. they have big noses. i just want to pick them up and bite their heads like laffy taffy. DO NOT STAN BLUE LIVES
October 2021

I identify as a meme

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as a meme. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of being uploaded onto the imgur website and linked into the reddit threads. People say to me that a person being a meme is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a computer scientist put my brain into my computer like johnny depp in transendence, equipping me with the dankest of pictures from the internet. From now on I want you guys to call me "Sir Danks-a-lot" and respect my right to meme from above and meme needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a memephobe and need to check your internet privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
January 2015

I sexually Identify as

RIP Hugh Hefner emojipasta

Rosa sat๐ŸšŒ so I could walk๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿพ MLK walked๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿพ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿพ so I could run๐Ÿƒ๐ŸพObama ran๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿพ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿพ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿพ so I could fly๐Ÿ™๐Ÿฝ๐Ÿฆ…๐Ÿฆ… Hugh๐Ÿ‘ด๐Ÿป died๐Ÿ’€โ˜ ๏ธ so I could nut๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ‡๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ #RIP
January 2024

Emoji Pasta

Our arm of righteous spam will smite thee!

twitchquotes: ~~~~~~~[]=ยคิ…( โ—”็›Šโ—” )แ•— The longer you cage us, the harder our arm of righteous spam will smite thee! ~~~~~~~[]=ยคิ…( โ—”็›Šโ—” )แ•—
twitch chat
July 2015
Trick2g

plebs vs subs

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