I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my p***s was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label:
For Women.
(βΜΏΔΉΜ―ββ¬β΄β¬β΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Hey, Mr. Morosan, this is Mike from Video Playground
twitchquotes:
Hey, Mr. Morosan, this is Mike from Video Playground, the adult marketplace. You've been ignoring my calls about your outstanding debt of $12.99 for Big Vegan Balls IV. I'm not here to shame or embarrass you for your taste in husky, sweaty man love, but I've got a business to run, and I wouldn't be able to provide you with the entertainment you frequently enjoy if I didn't get paid. Please don't make me revoke your platinum membership.
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Kripp
The mighty DONGER
twitchquotes:
α 
β± He is faster α β± He is stronger α β± Who is he? α β± The mighty DONGER α β±
β± He is faster α β± He is stronger α β± Who is he? α β± The mighty DONGER α β±
twitch chat
Riot Games
Riven is the perfect champion
twitchquotes:
Riven is the perfect champion. With every 3rd Q cast she flips upside down ahd shows her panties to the 300 million active incel League of Legends players. The voice acting when she casts her ult is perfect for fellow spergs in need of voice ASMR assistance during masturbation, and to top it all off, the toes of her feet are exposed for the maximum pleasure per second (p/s) of gameplay. One of the greatest champions by Riot Games so far next to Braum.
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League of Legends
Just me and EA hanging out
twitchquotes:
Just me and π°πEAππ°, hanging out I wanted some Star Warsπ so I started to pout π He asked if I was down β¬for something yummy ππ and I asked what and he said he'd give me his π°π¦looties!π¦π° Yeah! Yeah!ππ¦ I earn them!π¦ I buy them!π¦ I purchase them wholeπ¦π° π It makes π°πEAππ° πhappyπ so it's my only goal... ππ¦π«Harder EA! Harder EA! π«π¦π 1 lootieπ¦, 2 lootieπ¦π¦, 3 lootieπ¦π¦π¦, 4π¦π¦π¦π¦ I'm π°πEA'sππ° πDisney princess πbut I'm also a consumer whore! π He makes me OPπ!He makes me feel goodπ! πππHe makes me feel everything a whale should!~ πππ ππ¦πWa-What!ππ¦πο»Ώ
twitch chat
I put sushi in my husbandβs butthole while he was asleep
He was sleeping soundly naked, and I was eating leftover sushi. I couldn't help myself. I spread open his cheeks ever so softly, and tucked a slice of Philly roll right next to his puckered asshole. He did not wake up. When he awoke several hours later, he thought he had shit himself. I managed to video him discovering it was in his asshole, and I cannot stop watching him dig salmon, cream cheese, and rice out of his butthole. I also cannot stop laughing. I needed to tell someone.