[Copypasta] โš ๏ธ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my p***s was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
December 2021
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Kripp uploads a video that breaks Pornhub's terms of use

twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp

2Chainz lyrics

twitchquotes: "She got a big booty, so I call her big booty". -2Chainz Upon initial glance, these lyrics appear to be an unintelligent embodiment of the lack of creativity that rap and hip hop music is viewed as today. However upon further investigation, one will find that, in actuality, lyrical genius 2Chainz has crafted a beautiful and deep piece of literature carefully condensed into a single 11 word sentence that perfectly describes not only the world we live in, but also life itself.
twitch chat
February 2019

What is left of the Kripp we all loved?

twitchquotes: ๏ผฎ๏ฝ ๏ผฐ๏ฝ๏ผฅ๏ผŒ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝ”๏ฝ”๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ผŒ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ ๏ผฏ๏ผช๏ผŒ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ฝ” ๏ฝŽ๏ฝŒ๏ผŽ ๏ผท๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝ” ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ…๏ฝ†๏ฝ” ๏ฝ๏ฝ† ๏ฝ”๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ ๏ฝ—๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ–๏ฝ…๏ฝ„๏ผŸ ๏ผฎ๏ฝ๏ฝ— ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ™๏ฝ“ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ผŒ ๏ฝ†๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“๏ฝ”๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ“๏ฝ•๏ฝ‚๏ฝ“๏ฝƒ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ‚๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ“๏ผŒ ๏ฝ„๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ ๏ฝŠ๏ฝ•๏ฝ‰๏ฝƒ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ™๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ†๏ฝ๏ฝ’ ๏ผด๏ผณ๏ผญ
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020

Megaman

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
ascii art
November 2014
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing