About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
What happened to this ad? :(
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Happy PresiDICK’S 🍆🍌🌽 DAY‼️ Time ⏰⏰ to honor the DADDIES 👬👬 of our nation 🇺🇸🇺🇸 George SLUTsington 👯👯, Benjamin SPANKlin👋🍑, John HanCOCK 🍆🌽💦💦💦 These POUNDING 🔨⚒ fathers ERECTED ⬆️⬆️ their 😻📃CUNTstitutional dongs 😍🍌for LADY LIBERTY 🗽👅🙀 Raise that ASS 🍑 to 💦💦 Abraham LinCUM 💦💦, 🌲 WOODrow Wilson 😏🌲😉, Bill CLIT-on 👌👈, and the CUMmander in chief, 👦🍆👀BarCOCK Obama 👦🍆👀 Don’t forget Dwight D. EisenWHORE 👀😩 DICKlared war 🔫💣 on those CUMMIES 💦💂💂 Share in ♋️ SUCKonds or you won’t be pounding 🔨that presidential PUSSY 🙀🙀 Get 5️⃣ back and ur a White House HOE 🏠 Get 🔟 back and ur the SUCKretary of state 📔😙🇺🇸 Get 20 back and the First Lady will make u moan 😩😩💦💦💦💦💦 HAPPY JIZZIDENT’S DAY!! Hail to the CHEEKS 🍑🍑🍑
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10 years since kolento strim
twitchquotes:
10 years since kolento strim.i walk through the empty streets trying to think of something else but my path always leads to the stream. i stare at the screen for hours and try to summon the lord. i watch other asian girls streaming but it is no good. i flame trump in his channel and try to resist the nazi mods but it is all meaningless. the end is near.i then usually watch some old kolento vods and cry myself to sleep.
twitch chat
Kolento
James Patterson plays Druid
twitchquotes:
The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
Hearthstone
Just got told i was gay becouse i smell nice???
Bruh? Like sorry i don't smell like a mix of piss sweat and axe body spray Troy. I will gladly shower every night AND morning and use fruit and coconut smelled soap and deodorant. My good hygeine doesn't have anything to do with my professional competitive cock sucking
Ratge
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