[Copypasta] what do you say when you come? murk durgle

About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist. I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out" Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
January 2022
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Logan Paul Apology but I replace "apologize" with "cum"

I've made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgement and I don't expect to be forgiven. I'm simply here to cum. So what we came across that day on the woods was obviously unplanned and the reactions you saw on tape were raw, they were unfiltered. None of us knew how to react or how to feel. I should have never posted the video. I should have put the cameras down, and stopped recording what we were going through. There's a lot of things I should have done differently, but I didn't, and for that from the bottom of my heart, I am sorry. I want to cum to the internet, I want to cum to anyone who's seen the video, I want to cum to anyone who has been affected or touched by mental illness, or depression, or suicide. But, most importantly, I want to cum to the victim and his family. For, my fans, who are defending my actions, please don't, they do not deserve to be defended. The goal of my content is always to entertain, to push the boundaries, to be all inclusive and in the world I live in I share almost everything I do. The intent is never to be heartless, cruel, or malicious. Like I said, I made a huge mistake, I don't expect to be forgiven, I'm just here to cum. I'm ashamed of myself. I'm disappointed in myself, and I promise to be better. I will be better, thank you.
May 2022

YOU. ME. GAS STATION.

What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in.
January 2022

SPAM THIS STATIC TO HELP FNATIC

twitchquotes: MorphinTime SPAM MorphinTime THIS MorphinTime STATIC MorphinTime TO MorphinTime HELP MorphinTime FNATIC MorphinTime
twitch chat
October 2018
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Rhyme Chant

I've achieved so much that you'll never come close to

twitchquotes: I've achieved so much that you'll never come close to. Your life is fucking empty, which is why you're relishing this little bit of attention you're getting from someone. You spent an evening tweeting inane opinions and reactions into the void. Let me know when reality kicks in.
twitch chat
May 2019

Spiderman Logo

β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β”€β”€β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β”€β”€β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–Œβ”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ”€β”€β–€β–€β–„β–Œβ–„β–β–„β–€β–€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€ β”€β–β–ˆβ”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–€β–ˆβ–„β”€β–ˆβ–Œβ”€ β”€β”€β–€β–€β”€β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β”€β–€β–€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β”€β–„β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β”€β–€β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€ β”€β–„β–ˆβ”€β”€β–„β–€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–€β–„β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β”€ β–β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆβ–Œβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–Œ β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€ β”€β–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β”€ β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β–β”€β”€β”€β–β”€β”€β”€β”€
September 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing