About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
I hate MORBIUS. I HATE IT
Oh for the love of God. Enough with the MORBIUS. Whatās even the joke???? āHahahaha hey guys the movie sucks but I pretend itās goodā???? THATS NOT EVEN A FUCKING JOKE. Holy shit my dick is going to fall out of its foreskin if I have to hear, āhehe itās morbin timeā ONE MORE TIME. Not only is it NOT funny, IT DOESNT EVEN MAKE SENSE. THE POWER RANGERS HAVENT BEEN RELEVANT IN DECADES. MORBIUS SUCKS THE MOVIE IS COMPLETE TRASH AND IM ASHAMED TO HAVE SPENT MONEY ON IT. You knowā¦. I never would have seen the movie without all of these āmemesā(unfunny shitposts). I would have been a MUCH HAPPIER PERSON. So fuck your āMORBIUSā your āmighty morbin more morbs morbidly MORBIUS BULLSHITā NO ONE CARES, YOU ARENT FUNNY. Does not a singular human being have any independent thought anymore???? āMorb morb morb morbā youāre like a BUNCH OF SEAGULLS. SEA GULLS. What the FUCK does āmorbinā even mean????? ITS NOT A WORD. ITS JUST GOBBLE GOOP. I feel like I am the last truly sentient human being on earth. IM BEING DRIVEN TO THE BRINK OF INSANITY. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. TAKE YOUR MORBIUS BULLSHIT, SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS, AND GO OUTSIDE. Maybe if you went outside you could get āmorbā bitches on your dick??!!! YOU LIKE THAT, YOU SEE WHAT YOUVE REDUCED ME INTO. I am a shell of a man and all of you collectively are to blame.This meme has spread like a debilitating illness AND I CANT GET AWAY FROM IT. THE FALL OF WESTERN SOCIETY IS HERE AND THIS COMPLETE UNFUNNY DRIBBLE OF A MEME IS PART OF THE PROBLEM. WHAT THE FUCK DOES āgETtiNg MoRBedā EVEN MEAN. it makes ZERO SENSE. ITS JUST GIBBERISH. FUCKING GIBB ER ISH. ITS NOT FUNNY. Saying āmorbā LIKE ITS ITS OWN PUNCHLINE IS NOT COMEDY. IT IS COMEDIC AND CULTURAL DEGRADATION. Are we really so stunted as a generation that even the mention of any word that starts with m-o-r-b is FUNNY??? IN WHAT FUCKING UNIVERSE. Is it funny because it isnāt funny because praising something bad is now good??????? HOW MANY LAYERS OF IRONY DO WE NEED. HOW FAR DOES THE RABBIT HOLE GO. This website has stripped me of EVERY LAST BRAINCELL. GOING ON REDDIT FEELS LIKE IM GETTING A SUPER HERO INDUCED LOBOTOMY. I hate MORBIUS. I HATE IT. I know Iām just going to get FLOODED WITH āget morbed, this guy got morbed, what morb does to a manā HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHQHQHAHAHAHAHAHWHHSHWBSQIISHWINSIQKSBDD SSSSOOOOOOOOOOOO FUNNNNNNNNYYYYYYY AGAGAGGAGHHHHHHHHH
Morbius
Meeting Kripp at the urinals
Positive "Give me a second guys" copypasta
twitchquotes:
āGive me a second, guys,ā Kripp says. āGotta hit up the bathroomā He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately springs up from his chair and shouts "I LOVE THIS GAME!" before giving Dex a swift pat on the head. As Dex yips loudly in delight, Kripp runs over to give Rania a kiss on the cheek. Rania then tries to take out the trash, but Kripp swiftly grabs the bag from her and does it for her. Elated, Kripp wipes the sweat off his forehead, sits back down, and resumes his stream.
twitch chat
Kripp
We will not go quietly into the night!
twitchquotes:
We will not go quietly into the night! 
We will not vanish without a fight! Weāre going to live on! Weāre going to survive! Today, we celebrate our Independence Day! BROTHERS, HOLD THE LINE š„ _šŖ
We will not vanish without a fight! Weāre going to live on! Weāre going to survive! Today, we celebrate our Independence Day! BROTHERS, HOLD THE LINE š„ _šŖ
twitch chat
Kripp
Rudy Giuliani brings a plate of evidence
Holy shit. Rudy Giuliani came into the presser to bring me a plate of election fraud evidence and I literally screamed at him and hit the plate of evidence out of his hand. He started yelling "HEEEREEE'S KRAKEN!" at me and I cut the live feed on him. Iām so distressed right now I donāt know what to do. I didnāt mean to do that to Rudy but Iām literally in shock from the evidence tonight. I feel like Iām going to explode. Why the fucking fuck is he losing? This canāt be happening. Iām having a fucking breakdown. I donāt want to believe the world is so corrupt. I want to Build Back Betterā¢. I want Biden to be president and fix this broken country. I cannot fucking deal with this right now. It wasnāt supposed to be like this, I thought he was polling well in Michigan???? This is so fucked.