About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Just saw Trump in a hotel
twitchquotes:
Just saw Trump in a hotel and I asked if he was going to win the election. He laughed and winked at me, then grabbed me by the hair and dragged me into a toilet and spat in my mouth while chanting “make America great again” over and over in my ear. Make of that what you will
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2020 US Election
6.84 dota patch was found dead at his hotel room
twitchquotes:
Breaking News : Much expected 6.84 dota patch was found dead at his hotel room. Police suspects gunshot wounds found at victims body might be caused from a long range rifle. Witnesses reported "Hoho" "Haha" sounds was heared right before shooting.
twitch chat
Dendi
Dota 2
Hi Toast this is Mrs. Laurent - Fiora's mom
twitchquotes:
Hi Toast this is Mrs. Laurent - Fiora's mom. I noticed you have been picking my girl for your team in gym class. Fiora has been having a really tough time since her dad and I split up, and I know how much it means to her. You could have been rerolling saying: "We're never taking Fiora." It warms my tired heart that you would show such kindness and give a struggling girl with a good, noble soul a chance. Bless you Toastfor never giving up on my dear little girl
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DisguisedToast
Teamfight Tactics
BOGGED
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣶⣾⣾⣶⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢠⡄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠈⣭⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣴⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡝⢹⣷⣤⣦⣤⣴⣴⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠗⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠷⠂⠈⠙⠛⣿⣿⢟⣽⠿⠿⠌⠙⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⡿⡋⠁⠄⣾⢠⣶⣧⠘⣿⢿⣷⢄⡀⣠⣴⠿⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣵⡶⠶⡛⡋⢉⣿⣧⠄⠈⠛⠋⠑⠉⠁⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠨⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡋⠄⠸⠃⠄⣼⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⠐⠒⠂⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣾⡟⢿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠅⠄⠄⠄⢰⡿⠿⠿⠛⢢⠄⣶⣶⣴⣶⡶⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿⡟⠄⠈⠻⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⡀⠄⠉⠁⠁⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈
This ELO IS UNFAIR
twitchquotes:
THIS ELO IS UNFAIR! TIMTHEFATMAN IS IN THERE! LOSING EVERY GAME SESSION! GIVING HIS TEAM DEPRESSION!
THIS ELO IS UNFAIR! TIMTHEFATMAN IS IN THERE! LOSING EVERY GAME SESSION! GIVING HIS TEAM DEPRESSION!
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TimTheTatman