About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
What happened to this ad? :(
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Salt mines are now Greece's #1 export
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Hello Mr. Kripp, on behalf of the entire Greek country, I would like to thank you for single handedly restoring our economy with your endless supplies of salt. Salt mines are now Greece's #1 export. Most excellent, all hail Kripperino!
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Kripp
Hey Aura, thanks for telling me about Energizer batteries
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Hey Aura, thanks for telling me about Energizer batteries. Before Energizer I would be listening to my walkman and the battery would die and then I could hear my wife in the other room having sex with you. That would lead me to tears. Now using Energizer the battery doesn't die as quickly and I can listen to your VODs that I ripped without your permission on repeat and not notice her taking it hard. I don't need to rehydrate as often since I won't be crying. Thank you
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Aurateur
It's EXAM WEEK
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It's EXAM WEEK π€π€ and it's TIME β±β± to WHIP OUT π―π― your EDUCATION ERECTIONS ππππ and FUCK THESE FINALS π€£π€£ππ. That's RIGHT, get READY to BOOTYCALL ππ your SLUTTY STUDY BUDDIES ππ and HIT ππ the BOOKS πππtill your BRAIN π§ π§ is RUBBED RAW π«π« and your PEN ππis DRY π΅π΅. So let's put the CUM in CUMULATIVE π¦π¦ and do this THING ππ. Send this to 11 of the SKANKIEST π€€π€€ SCHOLARS you know or you will LITERALLY get F'D! π±π±
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Emoji Pasta
I'm leaving this community, jerma can't keep getting away with this
I'm leaving this community, jerma can't keep getting away with this
After jerma's recent apology video, it seemed like the only thing he cared about before going live was his looks. He came onto stream and honestly seemed slightly drunk. He proceeded to spend time talking about how fun it was to 'woohoo' death. He used another term, but due to me actually caring about the people here, I decided it's better to censor myself.
He did briefly apologize for the Amelia situation, but that twitlonger she wrote really exposed the absolute horror of being stood up and finding your date in bed with the reaper of souls himself.
I think the worst part of the apology was how he kept saying "that isn't who I am" but proceeded to fall asleep once again at the end. Also I'm fairly certain he was still on the toilet. I heard a few weird noises. I really hope this psycho gets banned.
p.s. I'm starting to think the 'jerma speared and killed a man' conspiracy theory may have had been real.
Jerma985
I hope Zoe wins but in Spanish
twitchquotes:
Espero que gane Zoe xD. Soy main de Zoe y es tan tan divertida!! Me encanta trolear con su burbuja, y sus diΓ‘logos son tan monos como cuando canta sobre tarta de chocolate LOL! Es super random pero tambiΓ©n mas lista de lo que parece, justo como yo xD
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