About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
I used to be a real ad
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Windmill of Friendship
twitch chat
imaqtpie
Little dribble drop
You guys ever like hustle your pee too quickly and pull your dick in faster than you’re done shaking? Then you have that little dribble drop that goes onto your leg. It’s only a drop. But you fucking feel it. Sprawling down your thigh. Making its presence known and ruining whatever plans you just had.
Just happened. The fucking worst.
WallStreetBets
Priced in
Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
Classic
WallStreetBets
Kaceytron's Porn Producer
twitchquotes:
ＫＡＣＥＹＴＲＯＮ, ＨＥＲＥ＇Ｓ ＹＯＵＲ ＰＯＲＮ ＰＲＯＤＵＣＥＲ ＣＡＬＬＩＮＧ ＹＯＵ ＯＵＴ！ Ｉ ＣＯＵＬＤＮ＇Ｔ ＲＥＡＣＨ ＹＯＵ ＯＮ ＰＯＲＮＨＵＢ ＯＲ ＢＲＡＺＺＥＲＳ, ＳＯ Ｉ＇Ｍ ＣＡＬＬＩＮＧ ＹＯＵ ＯＵＴ ＨＥＲＥ ＯＮ ＴＨＥ ＴＷＩＴＣＨ ＣＨＡＴ, ＨＯＰＥ ＹＯＵ ＤＯＮ＇Ｔ ＭＩＮＤ！ ＷＥ ＪＵＳＴ ＳＣＨＥＤＵＬＥＤ Ａ ＮＥＷ ＭＯＶＩＥ ＣＡＬＬＥＤ "ＫＩＮＧ ＤＯＮＧＥＲ" ＹＯＵ＇ＬＬ ＢＥ ＴＨＥ ＭＡＩＮ ＳＴＡＲ ＡＬＯＮＧ ＷＩＴＨ ＢＥＮ Ｄ＇ＯＶＥＲ ＡＮＤ ＫＩＮＫＹ ＫＯＮＧ！ ＣＯＭＥ ＯＶＥＲ ＴＯＭＯＲＲＯＷ ＡＴ １２ＰＭ, ＷＥ ＳＴＡＲＴ ＰＲＯＤＵＣＴＩＯＮ ＡＴ ＴＨＡＴ ＨＯＵＲ. ＩＦ ＹＯＵ ＤＯ ＷＥＬＬ, ＹＯＵ＇ＬＬ ＨＡＶＥ ＡＮ ＥＸＴＲＡ. ＜３ ＸＯＸＯ
twitch chat
Kaceytron
PJSalt = Hs²
twitchquotes:
Albert Einstein was desperate. He tried to prove that the luck of Kripp's opponents was within the laws of mathematics. Critics laughed claiming bad luck is divine punishment for embracing casualness. On his deathbed, he spent his last seconds jotting down the most famous formulas, 
= Hs²
= Hs²
twitch chat
Kripp