About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Do not call your significant other honey
Do π not π call π your π significant π other π honey π unless π you π are π a π bee π you π are π appropriating π bee π culture, π this π cannot π bee π accepted π
No hate towards Discord server admins
I'm seeing many bigoted messages in #general so I just want to make this clear: any hate towards server admins will result in a permanent ban from this Discord server with no warning. This includes, but is not limited to, calling moderation a "fake job" or saying that we "do it for free". Moderation is one of the most useful jobs to society.
Behave. Or get banned.
Discord
MODS
CSGO rage
The only reason, the only reason youβre all laughing is because you donβt understand that I also played in a team before and itβs actually proper CS and not the kind of shit you play. Iβm not gonna play matchmaking with you all because youβre all fucking useless anyway. You know why youβre better than me? Do you know why? Shut the fuck up you cunts. Tell me the answer, come on you fucking retards, laugh all you want you fucking dumbasses, honestly, fuck this. Youβre all having a laugh and Iβm trying to play a game and actually do something and fucking win. Fuck my dick.
CSGO
I've never even watched The Simpsons
I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
Story of Felipe
twitchquotes:
Let me tell you about Felipe. Felipe is good boy from Guadalajara. He wake at 6:00 to make food for white man. He eat his chipotle like a good boy, and clean the taco like a good boy. When he finish burrito he play stonehearth, but Felipe is sad. Felipe say he no win because of Kripp, and Felipe want retribution. Beware your taco kripp, it may have jalapeno poison...
twitch chat
Kripp