About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
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HYDRA SUMMONING SPELL
twitchquotes:
THIS IS THE SUMMONING SPELL 
FOR THE HYDRA DEEK OF HELL ONE WEEB MUST BE SACRIFICED FOR THE HYDRA DEEK TO RISE OH MIGHTY HYDRA I SING YOUR SONG MAY YOU GROW BIG AND LONG
FOR THE HYDRA DEEK OF HELL ONE WEEB MUST BE SACRIFICED FOR THE HYDRA DEEK TO RISE OH MIGHTY HYDRA I SING YOUR SONG MAY YOU GROW BIG AND LONG
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In the name of Renly of House Baratheon
Ghiaccio: You know Paris, France?
You know Paris, France? In English, it's pronounced "Paris" but everyone else pronounces it without the "s" sound, like the French do. But with Venezia, everyone pronouces it the English way: "Venice". Like 'The Merchant of Venice' or 'Death in Venice'. WHY, THOUGH!? WHY ISN'T THE TITLE DEATH IN VENEZIA!? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!? IT TAKES PLACE IN ITALY, SO USE THE ITALIAN WORD, DAMMIT! THAT SHIT PISSES ME OFF! BUNCH OF DUMBASSES!
JoJo's Bizarre Adventure
What is trolling?
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Trolling - the mental disorder of being in-denial while not having to admit that they're truly lonely and in need of desperate attention while also being under the influence of being sarcastic and in most cases just idiotic. Trolling is also represented by just typing the 
emote. Pls copypaste to spread awareness
emote. Pls copypaste to spread awareness
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imaqtpie
It is physically impossible to simp for pokimane
twitchquotes:
Simp means Sucker Idolizing Mediocre Pussy. A man is only a simp if the girl he is after has a mediocre pussy, but pokimane’s pussy is a goddess pussy, at worst. I will continue to donate 50% of my paycheck to pokimane because I know that it’s not simping. Poki if you see this I love you please text me back.
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Pokimane