About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
I used to be a real ad
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My mom took away my Xbox
twitchquotes:
My mom took away my Xbox. This is the saddest moment in my life. The most pain and unimaginable suffering I have ever felt before. Have I been a bad boy? Is that why she did what she did? I don’t know. I have so many questions. I also have depression because of lack of Xbox. I can’t play Minecraft. I love Minecraft so so much, it’s my favorite game in the entire world. Why would she take such joy and happiness away from me? Does she think I do bad things on there? If so, she should know that I join good Christian Minecraft servers only. That’s it.... I give up. I can’t fr*cking take another painful second of this anymore. This torture is what has been depressing me for so long. I swear to h**k, I’ll get that Xbox back if it kills me.
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Kripp you're a good-for-nothing bully
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Kripp, this behavior of yours is disgusting and honestly makes me want to unsubscribe from you. You're a grown man who apparently has to beat up 12 year old free to play players just for a cheap laugh. I don't know who you think you are, but now I know that you're nothing but a good-for-nothing bully.
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Kripp
LACKS CRITICAL INFORMATION
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HE LACKS CRITICAL INFORMATION
HE LACKS CRITICAL INFORMATION
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Albert Einstein and Arteezy's farm
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Albert Einstein, one of the greatest minds to ever live, was once perplexed by the speed at which Arteezy was able to farm. Seemingly impossible GPMs of 800+ every game were consistently observed, leading to the hypothesis that this was no fluke. Einstein spent the last years of his life trying to prove the ability of Arteezy's farm existed within the laws of science. Critics laughed at his efforts, claiming that Arteezy's farm was an undeniable act of divine intervention. It wasn't until the end when Einstein found the answer. On his deathbed, Einstein spent the last seconds of his life jotting down what is now the world's most infamous scientific formula. r=tz²
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Arteezy
Pewdiepie is being held captive by T-Series
twitchquotes:
❕ATTENTION⚠️9️⃣YR OLDS👶🏻, WE NEED UR HELP🗣! PEWDIEPIE🇸🇪 IS BEING HELD🗡CAPTIVE👁 BY ♿T-SERIES🆘️AND CAN ONLY BE RELEASED🗝 IF U SMASH 🔨THAT SUBSCRIBE 🅱️UTTON👍🏻AND👏🏻 TURN ON THE BELL🔔! TIME🕒 IS TICKING, LETS⏳⌛️ 🤜🏻BRO FIST T-SERIES🤛🏻 AND GET THE EPIC 🥇VICTORY ROYAL🚩🚩💰
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