[Copypasta] what do you say when you come? murk durgle

About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist. I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out" Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
January 2022
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/ry216i/comment/hrmismb/
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Ocean Man

twitchquotes: OCEAN MAN 🌊 😍 Take me by the hand ✋ lead me to the land that you understand 🙌 🌊 OCEAN MAN 🌊 😍 The voyage 🚲 to the corner of the 🌎 globe is a real trip 👌 🌊 OCEAN MAN 🌊 😍 The crust of a tan man 👳 imbibed by the sand 👍 Soaking up the 💦 thirst of the land 💯
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September 2016

Emoji Pasta

Shroud

⠄⠄⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⢰⡾⠛⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⣀⣤⣤⣴⣦⣠⣄⣀⠄⠄⠄ ⠋⠁⣠⣄⣴⣶⠶⠶⠶⣦⡜⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠃⠁⡀⠄ ⣷⣾⣿⠟⠁⡀⠄⠄⢀⠄⠁⠈⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠰⠿⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠊⠄ ⣿⣿⠃⣀⣘⣓⣤⣤⠈⠁⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⡿⡤⠄⣈⣠⣄⣉⣉⡉⢉⣂⣀⣠⣤⠑ ⣿⣽⣾⣿⣿⣟⣩⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡈⢷⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢸⣬⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠈⠛⠁⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣭⣴⣾⣾⣋⣀⣠⠤⠐⢺⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣼⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣀⡀⠄⠉⢿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⡈⢉⣼⣿⣿⡿⠿⠽⠻⠧⠄⠛⢛⠊⠉⠓⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⠇⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡡⣷⣾⠟⠉⣠⣦⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡷⡇⠄⠄⢀⡠⢀⣿⠓⣼⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⣿⣥⠄⠈⠙⠋⠄⣀⣉⣉⡉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⢴⣿⣷⣿⣿⢂⠿⡟ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⡦⠤⣤⣭⣤⠄⠂⢀⢠⡤⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⡸⠂⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣶⢛⠟⠿⡿⡉⣁⡂⠸⢿⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄
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December 2018
shroud

Arrested for Navy Seal copypasta

I've mentioned this a lot before, but one of my best friends from back home was arrested, jailed for three months, and sentenced to 2 years probation for sending someone the Navy Seal copypasta on Facebook. As of today, he is FINALLY legally allowed to be online again.
February 2019

Navy Seal

Roblox has taken over my sons life

Roblox has taken over my sons life, I need someone here to help me, it started off pretty small, he told me he was into this game called Roblox. I looked it over, seemed nice. That was 5 years ago, now my son has locked himself inside his room, using a pile of roblox toy plastic to guard me from opening it. When he comes out (The 1 time he does a week) he carries 5 bottles of empty soda pop filled with human waste and empty bags of food and throws them away. He will not speak to me, and will not leave the house, only will play Roblox. I've tried it all, but he seems to find a way to play roblox. I tired killing the WiFi but he payed someone in robux to let him have his, so he has his own wifi source, and trying to take away his PC causes him to go into a fit of terror, where he'll scream "ROBLOX ESCAPE THE BOSSBABY RAINBOW OBBY FIGDET SPINNER" until he gets it back please someone tell me how I stop this. I've tried doing a thing I call "Good Robloxian Robux" where I give him Robux when he does good things, like come out of his room, or doesn't use more then 20+ hours of wifi a day but it only works so much please someone tell me how I can get my son back, I miss that boy, he's 25 now, and needs a job
March 2021

Unfollowed on Twitch

⡿⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠻ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⣴⣿⣿⣿⣶⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣘⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣃⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⠖⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠻⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⠄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⠄⣿⢸⡇⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣆⠄⠘⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀ ⣿⣷⣶⡹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⠹⠿⠿⠿⠿⢱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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