[Copypasta] YOU. ME. GAS STATION.

What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in.
January 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Reynad and Kripp lay sprawled across the bed

twitchquotes: Reynad and Kripp lay sprawled across the bed, every inch of them exhausted from the rigorous topdecking that had just occurred. "Your deck was crazy" Kripp whimpered before remebering that he'd forgotten to pay. He grabbed a few coins from his emergency OJ stash. "Welcome to the five dollar club" he said as Reynad oiled up for the brofist.
twitch chat
April 2015
Reynad

KappaPride

Why are Chess Players so Racist?

Every time I here a chess player talk about race, they always say stuff like “I’m so glad that I am white this game” or “He was black, so he didn’t stand much of a chance that game”. Seriously, what is up with this blatant racism guys??? It’s getting so bad I am even hearing this sort of shit from some Indian players as well. Your color doesn’t mean anything, you are still the same person!!!!!!
August 2021

Chess

Globglogabgalab

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠠⡄⢠⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣰⣿⢡⣶⣼⣿⡿⠋⠙⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣇⢋⠀⢻⡟⠐⠻⣇⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⣟⣛⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⠛⠛⣶⣾⣠⣅⣀⣽⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡄⠀⣯⣭⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣦⢠⣿⡟⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣻⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⡟⣿⡿⠁⠀⢶⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠈⠁⢀⡤⣄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣺⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⡀⣠⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢈⡓⣦⠀ ⠀⠐⠋⠛⠉⠙⣿⣿⣯⡉⠉⠙⠳⢿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⡏⠁⠈⠉⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣾⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀
September 2021

Coca Cola shortage

twitchquotes: THIS JUST IN: Stores across the world are reporting a major shortage of 'store brand Cola'. Sources indicate that over 20 million bottles were sold within minutes of an endorsement by some dirty Romanian living in Athens.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

NA is so ba... I should brush my teeth

twitchquotes: SMOrc NA is so ba... SMOrc maybe i should brush my teeth SMOrc NA is s... SMOrc maybe i should floss SMOrc fk give me dentures SMOrc
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

Classic

EU vs NA

Text-to-Speech Playing