[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Christian Father is concerned with Fortnite

twitchquotes: Hello everyone, concerned Christian father here. Recently, my 11 year old son downloaded the video game "Fortnite" after playing it at a friend's house. While I didn't mind at first, it soon began to affect his character. Within a week, he had taken up hard drugs and smoking. When asked to do his homework, he called me a "default" and did a strange dance. His grades have been dropping heavily ever since that day and now he's threatening me with violence. Yesterday I entered his room to see him smoking a cigar and playing extremely loud rave (sinner) music, he has dyed his hair blue and neow refuses to go to Bible Study unless we "take the battle bus". I don't know what that is but he refuses to take any form of transport except that. Please I am so concerned, what do I do?
twitch chat
January 2019

Fortnite

Genuine Kripp Smile

twitchquotes: Look at him, look at that smile. That's a genuine Kripp Smileβ„’ there if I ever saw one. Now chat, if you pay close attention you'll realize that these rare, genuine demonstrations of happiness only actually happen when Kripp is playing Hearthstone. Not Artifact, not Magic, not anything else. Hearthstone is where Kripp's heart really is at. We just have to understand and support that, no matter what.
twitch chat
December 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Faceful Void

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘ β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘ β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘ β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–’β–β–‘β–β–Œβ–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–Œβ–‘ β–β–Œβ–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–β–β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–Œβ–β–€ β–‘β–β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–€β–„β–€β–€β–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
June 2015

Dota 2

Headphones

───────────────── β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–Ÿβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ ░▐░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓░░▐░░ ░▐░░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓░░░░░▓▓░░▐░░ β–‘β–β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘Β Β Β Β Β β–ˆΒ Β β–‘β–‘Β Β Β Β β–ˆΒ Β β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–—β–Ÿβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
August 2018

Dear Chat, in 1967 there was a little girl named Morgana

twitchquotes: Dear Chat, in 1967 there was a little girl named Morgana who wanted to become an ADC, She commited suicide after QT would not play, Now that you have seen this you must copy and paste 10 times or you too will commit suicide.
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing