[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

This is a routine PokiW check

twitchquotes: Hello sir. Do you know why I've stopped you? You haven't done anything wrong. This is just a routine PokiW check, sir. May I see your Twitch sub badges and username, please? Thank you. Now let's see that PokiW, hmm? Go ahead, type it in chat. No funny business. Dot the I and capitalize the W. I better not see an emote, son. Or you're off to jail.
twitch chat
September 2021
Pokimane

Kurumx big brain

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⡙⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣍⡙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⣡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣍⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣧⢻ ⣿⣿⣿⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡿⡿⣿⢸ ⣿⣿⣯⢰⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⠛⠻⠻⠻⢿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣨ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣭⡈⠙⠻⣿⣿⡟⣩⣭⡈⠙⠈⣀⣤⣤⠄⠄⣀⣴⡦⣨⢻ ⣿⣿⣿⢸⡿⠉⢻⡆⢸⣴⣦⢸⡿⠉⢻⡆⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⢻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣦⡛⠴⠛⠁⣸⣿⣿⣦⡛⠴⠛⠁⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢵⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠓⠺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⡥⣬⣿⣿⠋⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠁⠄⠄⣊⣊⣐⣀⠄⢹⣿⣿⠿⢣⣲⣴⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⣍⣭⣿⣿⡟⠈⠁⢲⣡⡤⡙⢾⢿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠈⠿⠟⠟⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣲⣿⣿⣿⡻⢿⣿
March 2021
Kurumx

Teamfight Tactics

Somewhere in a parallel universe, Reynad isn't salty

twitchquotes: ★  ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸  ★  :.  . • ○ ° ★  .  * . .  ¸ .   °  ¸. * ● ¸ . ...somewhere   ° ☾ °  ¸. ● ¸ .  ★ ° :.  . • °   .  * :. .in a parallel universe* ● ¸     ° ☾ °☆  . * ¸.   ★ ★ ° . .    . ☾ °☆  . * ● ¸ ..Reynad...° ☾ ★ °● ¸ .   ★ ° :.  . • ○ ° ★  .  * Isn't salty ☾ ★ °● ¸ .   ★ °
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad

Classic

Hearthstone

salty

FeelsAYAYAMan

⣿⢳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢣⣿⣿⡿⣫⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄ ⣾⣿⡿⣱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⢿⣏⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠄ ⣿⡿⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⠛⢱⣿⣿⣿⡟⡫⠾⢸⣧⠹⠊⢻⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⡝⣦ ⣿⢳⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢕⣛⠇⣦⣍⠻⠫⠼⠓⣘⢸⡟⠸⣛⣓⡛⢿⣿⡇⣝⢿⣷⡈ ⠃⣿⣿⢟⣫⣶⣾⣿⣿⠘⠋⣡⢨⠉⠩⣭⣔⠘⠡⠝⢒⢠⠄⠘⡟⣷⢿⣯⢻⡇ ⡟⠟⡕⣛⣿⣭⣽⣶⣶⡑⢿⡇⠐⠈⠄⣸⠿⠾⠰⠿⣇⠄⠄⠁⢀⣿⠘⢻⠸⡇ ⢱⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⡳⠶⠶⠶⢖⣒⣚⣩⣾⣷⣶⣶⣶⣿⡟⠋⠄⠸⠁⠁ ⡸⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣛⣭⣾⣿⣿⣷⣮⣭⣭⣭⣭⡅⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣷⢹⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⢸⡇⣿⣿⣿⡿⣩⣶⡶⢶⣶⣮⣭⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣣⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⢸⡇⣿⣿⣏⢧⡛⠿⠿⠷⠶⢶⣤⣭⣛⣛⠿⠿⠿⢟⣛⣛⣛⣛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣙⢸⢃⣿⣿⣿⣦⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⡭⠉⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣨⣒⠤⢬⣭⣝⣛⡻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣵⣶⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
November 2021

Weebs

Pepe

Absolutely appalled at it, 12 mins or so of pure shit

December 2020

Belle Delphine

Text-to-Speech Playing