PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
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I fucking hate Stuart Little
twitchquotes:
I fucking hate Stuart Little. I know what youβre thinking, this is some kind of funny joke, but no. Stuart Little is a piece of shit. A damn rat got picked over actual children at an orphanage and heβs supposed to be a hero? And I canβt even tell you how many damn times Iβve seen a great parking space only to turn the corner and realise Stuart Little is already parked there in his stupid little fucking convertible. He took my wife and the kids and my house and my job. I swear to fucking god, Iβm going to kill myself and take that goddamn rodent to hell with me. Stuart Little has ruined my family. Last summer, I approached the miserable mouse in the street, and asked him for his autograph, because my son is a huge fan. The fucking rat gave me the autograph and told me to burn in hell. Later, when I gave my son the autograph he started crying and said he hated me. Turns out the mousefucker didnt write his autograph, no, he wrote βyouβre a piece of shit, and i fucked your momβ. Iβm now divorced, and planning a huge class-action lawsuit against the white devil that ruined my life. Your time is almost over, Stuart. All the people youβve wronged will rise against you.
twitch chat
UwU in the streets
twitchquotes:
iβm an UwU in the streets but an OwO in the sheets
twitch chat
Moments later the mine explodes
twitch chat
Forsen
Hearthstone
Troll face kid
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Discord user cracks after seeing the word βsusβ
oh my god
among us isnt FUCKING FUNNY ANYMORE
ITS BEEN MONTHS
MONTHS
IM SICK OF THIS SHIT
JUST FIND SOMETHING ELSE PEOPLE OH MY GOD
EVERYTHING ABOUT AMONG US IS UNCOOL
LITERALLY EVERYTHING
IT SCREAMS βIM A VIRGINβ
AND GODDAMNIT THAT WHEN THE IMPOSTER IS SUS SHITB
ITS NOT FUNNY
ITS A DUDE ON METH
WHY DO PEOPLE LAUGH AT THIS
LIKE WHAT THE HELL BRO
PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD
HOLY SHIT HUMANITY IS FUCKed
THIS IS AN ABSOLUTE ALL TIME LOW
OH MY FYCKING LOOORDDD DUDE
@everyone STOP MAKING AMONG US JOKES
ITS NOT FUCKING FUNNY
holy shit
fuck anybody who finds among us funny
im done with this shit