[Copypasta] Twitch is ruining my life!

PLEASE HELP!!! Recently my wife has introduced me to a streaming platform known as twitch. I got so into it I spent a full week only watching my favorite twitch streamers like pokimane and sukkuno. All was well until February 15th where I was having a very important presentation at my job. All eyes were on me when I instinctively said KEKW with a straight face and veins bulging through my neck; I burst out of the workplace so fast my shoes fell off and I slammed into my car so hard I created a sonic boost in the wind and cried to myself saying sadCHAMP. Last Saturday was my grandmas funeral and guess WHAT? I SAID F IN THE CHAT GIVING MY MEMORIAL SPEECH. ARRRGGHHHH I HATE TWITCHC ITS RUINING MY LIFE!!!!1!!1!
March 2022
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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I released white fluid from my penis

Hello reddit, today I was rubbing my penis very fast with my hand then all of a sudden this massive release of white fluid came out of my penis, I searched up on google 'white fluid discharge from penis' and the results said I had a UTI. Could anyone figure out what came out of my penis?
November 2021

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I'm the Server Manager for PinkieCraft, the Pony Roleplay Minecraft server that you play on

Hi (name), I'm the Server Manager for PinkieCraft, the Pony Roleplay Minecraft server that you play on. On behalf of the owner, the staff team and myself, I would like to personally extend my thanks to you for the $1,000 you forked up to help keep our server alive! Our modeler is happily working on the custom pony character that came with the donor package, however I regret to inform you that we don't currently have a way to send you the 20" "horse shaft" you requested but our team is working on it. Once again, thank you sincerely for the donation, and we hope to see you back on the server soon. Best Regards, PinkieCraft Server Manager "Keep on clopping."
September 2021

Muffet from Undertale

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–€β–€β–„β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘ β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–€ β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
March 2016

Imagine getting BOO'd by Aurateur

twitchquotes: Imagine getting BOO'd by Aurateur. Literally instantly you get disintegrated. Before you can even react, every fiber of your being is atomized and lost to a mere button press. Every memorable moment of your life and all hope of a future is wasted in this brief moment a BALD Texan disliked your level. In a flash your existence is nothing but a poof. Thereafter, the BALD Texan continues on, swiftly forgetting of your existence, you having been nothing but an obstacle in his way.
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July 2020
Aurateur

This guy's chat is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: β˜‘ β€œThis guy's chat is CRAZY!” β˜‘ β€œMy mind can't bear seeing retards like that” β˜‘ "He NEEDED precisely those two copypastas to infuriate me" β˜‘ β€œHe pasted the only ASCII that could annoy me” β˜‘ "He used the perfect emotes" β˜‘ β€œThere was nothing I could do but ignore” β˜‘ β€œI copied that perfectly"
twitch chat
November 2014

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

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