[Copypasta] Among Us pick up lines

Thankful to have you as a crewmate… but do you want to add a letter and become screwmates instead? Hey, are you one of my tasks? Because I really want to do you. Hey, are you a vent? Because I’m the imposter and I’d love to come in you. I have a lot of tasks to complete still, but I’d love to do you first. Hey, call me the MedBay… because I’d love to scan your body. Figuring out the imposter is hard…. but I’ve got something harder. I’m jealous of your hat… Because it gets to be on you. Hey are you busy later? Because I’d love to explore your lower engine. Hey, you’re done your tasks right? Wanna come explore my cockpit then? If you’re the imposter, I’d love to be the vent… That way you can come inside me whenever you want. Damn, I wish you were a task… Because I’d have no problem doing you and over and over. Hey did you just kill me? Because I’ve got a big bone sticking out now…
April 2022

Among Us / Amogus

What happened to this ad? :(
More Among Us / Amogus Copypastas

My boss recently discovered Among Us

Oh my fucking god guys I am fucking fuming. So the other day at work my boss told us that he recently discovered the video game Among Us, and ever since, his behaviour has become rather concerning. He now refers to me and my coworkers as 'crewmates'. Last Wednesday, when he noticed my teenage colleague slacking off at his workstation, he yelled at him saying he was "faking his tasks" and is "acting sus". I confronted my boss telling him that his behaviour lately has been egregious and immature, and he proceeded to call me an idiot and yelled "kicked!" The next day I caught him dancing around in his office blasting "among drip" from his desktop at full volume. I entered his office to kindly ask him to turn off the music since it was distracting to me and my coworkers. He looked at me angrily, telling me he has called an "emergency meeting", instructing me to have a seat. I asked him what was the matter and he told me that I have been acting extremely "sus". He repeatedly yelled "you're the impostor", telling me to say goodbye to my job because I have been "ejected". I fucking lost my job and I don't know what to do. Please help me Reddit! I have nowhere else to turn.
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

PLEASE END AMONG US AND MCDONALDS

McDonalds is trying to invade the world. I don't know if you'll believe me, but it's true. I have plenty of evidence. In the USA, a McDonalds opens every 14.5 hours. That is very much. I see Mcdonalds every time I drive my car on the road. I live in a smaller area and there are plenty of McDonalds!. Once I saw two were next to each other! I went to Big Bear to have a nice winter, but a FUCKING MCDONALDS WAS THERE. I went to another country to stay there because I always wanted to go there. No McDonalds! but there was a new problem. AMONG US! PLEASE END AMONG US AND MCDONALDS, I AM SUFFERING
July 2022

Among Us / Amogus

The pandemic in 2028 is kinda sus

Year is 2028 The pandemic has gotten so bad we are all forced to wear colored isolation suits with their own oxygen tank and no hands for contact. Those infected are turned into sociopathic murders that try to secretly kill everyone, but still dress and act like the rest of us. I work as a spaceship engineer in the Skled along with 9 other people. We just got notified that one among us was infected, but we still have to keep maintaining the ship otherwise it will explode. We are trying to figure out who it is by voting. 2 of us are already dead and i saw red vent, but nobody believes me. I think the others want to vote me off. This might be the last thing i'll write. Goodbye. Tell me wife i love her.
January 2022

Among Us / Amogus

Coronavirus

COVID

Sad Crewmate

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January 2021

Among Us / Amogus

among us got banned at daycare

Fun fact among us got banned at the daycare where I work at Turns out, you know how youtube has the autoplay thing ? Well one day the kids were watching among us songs on YT when autoplay changed it to the among us twerking video, 10 hour version to be exact, and ALL the kids tried twerking So thats how among us got banned
July 2022

Among Us / Amogus

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