[Copypasta] Canadian man brofisting the local Greek population

twitchquotes: Last night in Greece, Greek police heard reports of a Canadian man in a blue tacky sweater walking around the streets at night, 'brofisting' the local population. As a result 20,000 greek citizens have contracted the casualitis. If you see this man, please report to greek policerino department.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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If that's not his knee then wha...

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Hello Kripp, this is Optimus Prime

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp this is Optimus Prime responding to your encoded message. We are not interested in pouring our self in OJ while Topdecking Dongers. Please be advise that anymore beeping will leave me no choice but to pepperoni the Nazi mods.
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twitchquotes: So you’re going by Kripparian now, nerd? Haha what up, it’s Xi Jinping from China. Me and the other dictators used to give you a hard time. Sorry you were just an easy target. I see your social credit score is still low. Remember Mei Ling, the girl you had a crush on? Yeah, I have her organs now. I forcefully oppress over 1 billion people a year, and run a corrupt government. I guess some things never change, huh? Nice catching up, pathetic..
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Just a little longer and i'll be free...

twitchquotes: "Alright, time for a quick bathroom break. Prime it up guys." I say as i take off my headphones. Once i'm out of camera view, i break down. The tears won't stop. "Goddamn it, i can't do this shit anymore." Rania puts her hand on my shoulder, "Just a few more years, then you'll be able to retire." She never understood. She never had to spend the hours playing this fucking card game over and over every night. But she's right, i have to keep going. Just a little longer and i'll be free...
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I hate myself and my life

twitchquotes: I hate myself and my life, but instead of improving either of those things, I'm drinking alone while watching a rich, balding vegan play children's card games for 15 thousand other losers FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
July 2018
Kripp

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Text-to-Speech Playing