[Copypasta] RIP Joe the Spider

I know this is really stupid but I’m sad about it. Yesterday I had a friend come over. I’m a girl who lives alone so I guess some “dude” stuff hasn’t been done around the house. Context: I have a spider named joe. He’s a dandy long leg. He’s been my friend in the bathroom for months and had recently made his way down to closer by me by the tub instead of on the ceiling. I like to think I gained his trust. Well my friend goes into the bathroom and comes out said “you’re welcome”. I’m super confused. So I ask “for what?” He says “I just killed a big ass spider for you”. I couldn’t even contain myself. I just yelled “YOU KILLED JOE?!” And started tearing up. I didn’t tell him to leave Joe alone it never occurred to me. JOE TRUSTED ME. Joe had been in my bathroom since he was super tiny and he grew to be such a big boy. My friend was distraught. He’s a Pisces, so he immediately felt my deep sorrow for Joe. He apologized and swore to never squish any more spiders at my house. I think Joe was biologically female because there is a baby Joe. Baby Joe is on my ceiling but idk if I can gain Baby Joe’s trust after they witnessed the murder of their parental figure. RIP Joe I miss you so much. Getting ready in the morning will never be the same.
May 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Kripp found dead

twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Anonymous (Guy Fawkes)

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⣤⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣄⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⡿⣿⢿⣟⣿⣻⣟⡿⣟⣿⣟⡿⣟⣿⣻⣟⣿⣻⢿⣻⡿⣿⢿⣷⣆⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢘⣿⢯⣷⡿⡿⡿⢿⢿⣷⣯⡿⣽⣞⣷⣻⢯⣷⣻⣾⡿⡿⢿⢿⢿⢯⣟⣞⡮⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢸⢞⠟⠃⣉⢉⠉⠉⠓⠫⢿⣿⣷⢷⣻⣞⣿⣾⡟⠽⠚⠊⠉⠉⠉⠙⠻⣞⢵⠂⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢜⢯⣺⢿⣻⣿⣿⣷⣔⡄⠄⠈⠛⣿⣿⡾⠋⠁⠄⠄⣄⣶⣾⣿⡿⣿⡳⡌⡗⡅⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢽⢱⢳⢹⡪⡞⠮⠯⢯⡻⡬⡐⢨⢿⣿⣿⢀⠐⡥⣻⡻⠯⡳⢳⢹⢜⢜⢜⢎⠆⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠠⣻⢌⠘⠌⡂⠈⠁⠉⠁⠘⠑⢧⣕⣿⣿⣿⢤⡪⠚⠂⠈⠁⠁⠁⠂⡑⠡⡈⢮⠅⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠠⣳⣿⣿⣽⣭⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣺⣟⣾⣻⣿⣯⢯⢿⣳⣶⣶⣶⣖⣶⣮⣭⣷⣽⣗⠍⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⢻⡿⡿⣟⣿⣻⣽⣟⣿⢯⣟⣞⡷⣿⣿⣯⢿⢽⢯⣿⣻⣟⣿⣻⣟⣿⣻⢿⣿⢀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⡑⡏⠯⡯⡳⡯⣗⢯⢟⡽⣗⣯⣟⣿⣿⣾⣫⢿⣽⠾⡽⣺⢳⡫⡞⡗⡝⢕⠕⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢂⡎⠅⡃⢇⠇⠇⣃⣧⡺⡻⡳⡫⣿⡿⣟⠞⠽⠯⢧⣅⣃⠣⠱⡑⡑⠨⢐⢌⠂⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠐⠼⣦⢀⠄⣶⣿⢿⣿⣧⣄⡌⠂⠢⠩⠂⠑⣁⣅⣾⢿⣟⣷⠦⠄⠄⡤⡇⡪⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠨⢻⣧⡅⡈⠛⠿⠿⠿⠛⠁⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⠘⠻⠿⠿⠯⠓⠁⢠⣱⡿⢑⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢌⢿⣷⡐⠤⣀⣀⣂⣀⢀⢀⡓⠝⡂⡀⢀⢀⢀⣀⣀⠤⢊⣼⡟⡡⡁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢢⠚⣿⣄⠈⠉⠛⠛⠟⠿⠿⠟⠿⠻⠻⠛⠛⠉⠄⣠⠾⢑⠰⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⢌⠿⣦⡡⣱⣸⣸⣆⠄⠄⠄⣰⣕⢔⢔⠡⣼⠞⡡⠁⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⢝⢷⣕⡷⣿⡿⠄⠄⠠⣿⣯⣯⡳⡽⡋⠌⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢮⣿⣽⣯⠄⠄⢨⣿⣿⡷⡫⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠙⠝⠂⠄⢘⠋⠃⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
February 2021

LCK AKA “literally can’t kill”

twitchquotes: LCK AKA “literally can’t kill” is the most boring major region internationally known for their low tempo boring gameplay, their premier caster LS aka “literally sleeping” and owning the record for the longest league game of all time.
twitch chat
October 2020
Riot Games

League of Legends

Thanks for backseating v2

Reminder for all participants of this chat: Streamer is very grateful for any incoming advice and tips on build, strategy, and abilities he should have used the last teamfight. He is a hardstuck Challenger therefore your advice is invaluable to him as people in silver bronze and iron show incredible out of the box thinking that can push the diamond player to greatness. Please do not hesitate to help the streamer and other chat users move forward with their game by sharing your incredibly smart ideas!
July 2022

League of Legends

I'm actually a pretty advanced bait station designer

I'm actually a pretty advanced bait station designer. While my formal education is a bit lacking, my cad and computer animation skills are really good, and I have some truly paradigm shifting ideas for bait stations, both vr and non vr. currently in the beginning stages of seeking VC funds, really trying to move my operation from San Antonio to Austin, a second location could triple my revenue right now. Obviously right now all our orders are high end custom stations, way out of reach for the avg wsb user. Its my dream to one day be able to produce real bait stations in a production environment. Right now my company is in talks with several engineering firms out of Seoul to take our cum recycling system and some how use the energy from the spent cum to recharge the batteries. While the technology is new. It has huge applications. Imagine when you go to charge your tsla, its powered completely by cum. No longer must we let our nonbiological female prostitutes flush our GOLD down the toilet post coitus, that shit is going to drive our new society. The money we save as a society on sock costs alone is tremendous.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Text-to-Speech Playing