[Copypasta] which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

I love the McChicken

For me, it's the McChicken. The best fast food sandwich. I even ask for extra McChicken sauce packets and the staff is so friendly and more than willing to oblige. One time I asked for McChicken sauce packets and they gave me three. I said, "Wow, three for free!" and the nice friendly McDonald's worker laughed and said, "I'm going to call you 3-for-free!". Now the staff greets me with "hey it's 3-for-free!" and ALWAYS give me three packets. It's such a fun and cool atmosphere at my local McDonald's restaurant, I go there at least 3 times a week for lunch and a large iced coffee with milk instead of cream, 1-2 times for breakfast on the weekend, and maybe once for dinner when I'm in a rush but want a great meal that is affordable, fast, and can match my daily nutritional needs. I even dip my fries in McChicken sauce, it's delicious! What a great restaurant.
April 2022

Only the chosen one can wield this sword...

twitchquotes: 𝕠|𝕠𝕠𝕠|=========> 𝕆ℕ𝕃𝕐 𝕋ℍ𝔼 ℂℍ𝕆𝕊𝔼ℕ 𝕆ℕ𝔼 ℂ𝔸ℕ 𝕎𝕀𝔼𝕃𝔻 𝕋ℍ𝕀𝕊 𝕊𝕎𝕆ℝ𝔻 𝔸ℕ𝔻 ℕ𝕆𝕋 𝔹𝔼 𝕊𝕃𝔸𝕀ℕ 𝔽𝕆ℝ 𝟙𝟘𝕄𝕀ℕ 𝔹𝕐 𝕀𝕋'𝕊 ℙ𝕆𝕎𝔼ℝ. 𝔸ℝ𝔼 𝕐𝕆𝕌 𝕋ℍ𝔼 ℂℍ𝕆𝕊𝔼ℕ 𝕆ℕ𝔼? ℂ𝕆ℙ𝕐 𝕋ℍ𝕀𝕊 ℙ𝔸𝕊𝕋𝔸 𝔸ℕ𝔻 𝔽𝕀ℕ𝔻 𝕆𝕌𝕋!
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp

Minecraft good. Fortnite bad.

Steps up to mic, straightens tie, clears throat, taps mic. "This thing on?" Murmurs of assent. Clears throat again. "Minecraft good." The crowd excitedly begins to talk amongst themselves, many holding bated breath. "Fortnite..." A hush falls over the crowd, rapt attention held. "Bad." Suddenly, the crowd goes wild, screaming their praise, demanding awards, running over each other to hug a loved one. Whistles of elation are heard and many are seen sobbing. World peace is enacted in acknowledgement to this monumental speech that knit the world together.
December 2021

Fortnite

Minecraft

Here in my garage

twitchquotes: Here in my garage, just bought this new Lamborghini here. It’s fun to drive up here in the Hollywood hills. But you know what I like more than materialistic things? Knowledge. In fact, I’m a lot more proud of these seven new bookshelves that I had to get installed to hold two thousand new books that I bought. It’s like the billionaire Warren Buffett says, “the more you learn, the more you earn.”
twitch chat
August 2018

Homer mmmm

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢁⠒⠀⢀⡔⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⢹⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠓⢄⡀⠀⢂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡀⡌⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢁⠄⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⡄⠁⠀⢀⣀⠀⠘⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡂⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠈⠢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠔⡞⣡⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡠⠈⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢄⣾⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⢢⣿⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⢐⠀⠀⡀⢐⠆⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⣿⣄⡄⠀⠈⠀⠀⠁⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⢘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⢀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡸⣿⣿⠏⠻⠟⠀⡌⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⡋⠀⠀⠀⠠⠐⠉⠀⠀⢀⠨⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠆⠀⠀⠀⡀⠄⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⢠⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⢿⣿ ⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻
July 2019
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