[Copypasta] which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022
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Roe v. Wade Emoji Pasta

HEY πŸ‘‹πŸ˜© there comrade πŸ’¦πŸ’ͺcummy! the πŸ‘Ή supreme πŸ† cockπŸ› has πŸ—³voted to strike πŸ‘©β€βš–οΈβŒ›οΈdown the 🌈 sexy 🀧🀰🏻roe v. wade decision 😏according 🀀🦢🏻to a opinion πŸ–ŠwrittenβœοΈπŸ’Έ by daddy πŸ’…πŸ»πŸ™ˆ sammy πŸ‘ΆπŸ»πŸ™…πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ aLITo. πŸ·πŸ’¨ the opinion is a πŸ’¦πŸŒ FULL THROATED πŸ“²β€οΈβ€πŸ”₯GIRTHY πŸ† contraDICKtion πŸš«πŸ‘ of the 1973 πŸ‘ΏπŸ‘Ždecision that πŸ’πŸ»β€β™€οΈπŸ‘Œ guaranteed federal 😀 cocks-titutuinal 😳 protection πŸ‘…πŸ’„of abortion rights!!! ❀️‍πŸ”₯🫑everyone who πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆπŸ’¦ woke remember πŸ™‹βœŠπŸ»πŸ€” to fund πŸ’ΈπŸ₯΅ planned parenthood and πŸŒͺπŸ‘Ό donate to πŸ§‘πŸΌβ€πŸΌπŸ€‘abortion funds! get yo πŸ“Έuturuses πŸ’‹πŸ‘ turnt you πŸ’ƒwhore! 🌭every whore knows 🧠🍼that everyone πŸ”œshould have πŸ‘©β€βš•οΈπŸ₯access to safe πŸ™ 🌎abortions ❀️😘 if they choose πŸ’…πŸ»πŸ‘€ to have one. πŸ‘‘πŸ‘Ήsend to ten πŸ˜¬πŸ™of your closest πŸš±πŸ…ΎοΈWHORES to secure abortion πŸ“«πŸ€rights in ameriCUM πŸ€€πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έif you get five βœ‹ back abortion πŸ˜˜πŸ’‹rights will be codified πŸ‘©β€βš–οΈπŸ€€in law πŸ“ΈπŸ‘ 
May 2022

Emoji Pasta

Politics

krippO

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–„β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–“β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–“β–‘ β–‘β–’β–’β–“β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–’β–“β–“ β–’β–‘β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–“β–‘β–“β–“ β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“ β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–“β–‘ β–’β–’β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–“β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–“β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–’β–‘ β–‘β–“β–“β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–“β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–’β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
August 2016
Kripp

Wife wants to leave me because of an NFT diamond ring

My wife loves new technology and is into cryptocurrency and so I thought it would be thoughtful to buy her a diamond ring as a NFT. I spent about 3 ETH which is like $12000 CAD. So when she got home from work I told her I had a surprise for her. I put a blindfold on my wife and guided her into our room where our computer is set up. Soon as she opened her eyes and saw what it was, she absolutely exploded with rage saying I was an asshole and was only thinking about myself. She then accused me of spending money on stupid thing and said she’s going to go find a boyfriend. I don’t know what to do in this situation. I was only thinking about HER interests and how happy she would be to receive this new technology. Plus the price of her ring will only appreciate. Stupid real diamonds only depreciate. We have now signed up for NFT relationship counselling. I have been seeking relationship advice but everyone says to buy her NFT flowers or NFT chocolates. And when I did that, that was the last straw. Wife sent me divorce papers and I converted it into NFT. I know in the long run when all these NFT’s moon. She will come crawling back.
February 2022

I dropped my deck of playing cards

twitchquotes: ᴬβ™₯ ⁴♣ Β³β™₯ ⁴β™₯ ¹⁰♣ α΄Άβ™  ⁢♠ α‘«β™₯ ⁸♦ ⁹♦ ⁴♠ ⁡β™₯ α΄·β™  ⁡♣ ⁡♦ ²♦ ⁡♠ α‘«β™  Β³β™  ⁢β™₯ β–Ό ⁢♣ ¹⁰β™₯ ⁢♦ I dropped my deck of playing cards ⁷β™₯ ᴬ♠ ⁷♣ ³♦ ᴷ♣ ⁷♦ Β²β™  ⁷♠ ⁸β™₯ ²♣ α΄·β™₯ ⁸♣ ⁴♦ ¹⁰♦ ⁸♠ ⁹β™₯ ᴬ♣ ⁹♣ ³♣ ⁹♠ ¹⁰β™₯ ¹⁰♦ ¹⁰♠ α΄Άβ™₯ ᴬ♦ Β²β™₯ ᴢ♣ ᴢ♦ ᑫ♣ ᑫ♦ ᴷ♦ α΄·β™ 
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Ok, so I basically fucked my bedroom door.

January 2021
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