[Copypasta] My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer

Hey, quandale Pringle here, My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him. My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
July 2022
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More Copypastas

Hot Twitch streamers are just not good for my health

Her streams are just not good for my health. She is so hot I skip every stage and go straight to post nut clarity, then I get a deep feeling of loneliness and dread. I just don't know what to do with myself and everything seems pointless.
December 2021

Coomer

If my girl and PPMD both drowning

if my girl 😍 and PPMD Kreygasm both drowning 😱 and I can only save one 😀 😬 Catch me at my girl’s funeral 😝 chanting STACK πŸ‘ IT πŸ‘ UP πŸ‘ 😏 πŸ’― 😎 πŸ†
December 2020

Super Smash Bros

And you thought there wouldn't be any bees in chat

twitchquotes: β–‘Aβ–‘nβ–‘dβ–‘ β–‘yβ–‘oβ–‘uβ–‘ β–‘tβ–‘hβ–‘oβ–‘uβ–‘gβ–‘hβ–‘tβ–‘ β–‘tβ–‘hβ–‘eβ–‘rβ–‘eβ–‘ β–‘wβ–‘oβ–‘uβ–‘lβ–‘dβ–‘nβ–‘tβ–‘ β–‘bβ–‘eβ–‘ β–‘aβ–‘nβ–‘yβ–‘ β–‘bβ–‘eβ–‘eβ–‘sβ–‘ β–‘iβ–‘nβ–‘ β–‘tβ–‘hβ–‘iβ–‘sβ–‘ β–‘cβ–‘hβ–‘aβ–‘tβ–‘ bUrself
twitch chat
May 2016
Forsen

Chess is a crappy tactical turn based RPG

Chess is a crappy tactical turn based RPG developed by a bunch of monkeys. Right away you'll notice Chess has no storyline. Instead, all you notice is the the White army and the Black army are fighting each other over a battlefield. Note the "a battlefield," because Chess only has one story map. As for the actual combat, it's extremely dull. Each unit can kill another with only one hit. This means units with a real good movement ability dominate the field (more on that bellow). There aren't even any combat animations or anything that happens in combat. One unit moves on it's space and "captures" it, and the piece is removed from the game with no form of action or special effects. Yawn. Chess has shitty class balance. The Queen is flat out overpowered while your actual front line units, the Pawns. can't do shit. I think the developers were afraid that no one would use the female character so they buffed up her abilities really high but now theres no point in using any other unit. The rest of the units suck. Rooks can only move in 4 directions, same with Bishops. Boring. Also, whats up with the Knight? It has the most bizzare combat abilities of all the units. They're retardly hard to use cause they jump around like retards to move and attack. The devs should have named this unit Ninja, since Knights didn't jump around like that in real life. Worst part, is the king. You see, the devs decided that if your king gets captured, you instantly lose the game. W-T-F? This wouldn't be a problem, except that he can't move for crap. Seriously, the most important unit in the game can only move 1 space a turn? Good luck keeping him alive while every other unit in the game dances around him. Unbalanced classes, lackluster gameplay, and not to mention repetitive 1 hour+ games. Chess is not worth the time or your money. Buy Final Fantasy Tactics or Disgaea instead. 3 out of 10.
December 2020

Maximus Kappacus Spamicus, commander of the Twitch Armies

twitchquotes: <:::::[]=Β€ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½οΎ‰ My name is Maximus Kappacus Spamicus, commander of the Armies of the Twitch, General of the PJSalt Legions, loyal servant to the true Emperor Kripparrian. Father to a banned son, and husband to a banned wife. I will slay all moderinos, whether in this chat or the next. <:::::[]=Β€ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½οΎ‰
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

MODS

salty

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