[Copypasta] My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer

Hey, quandale Pringle here, My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him. My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
July 2022
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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I think its hilarious u kids talking shit about Tim

twitchquotes: i think its hilarious πŸ˜‚πŸ˜­ u kids πŸ‘ΆπŸ™‹ talking shitπŸ—£πŸ’© about Tim. u wouldnt say this *** to him irl, hes jackedπŸ’ͺπŸ‘Š. not only that but he wears the freshest clothes,πŸ‘•πŸ‘– eats at the chillest restaurantsπŸ―β„ and hangs out with the hottest dudesπŸ”₯😎. yall are pathetic lolβœ‹
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TimTheTatman

Destroy and obliterate the Economy of Turkey

twitchquotes: As I have stated strongly before, and just to reiterate, if Turkey does anything that I, in my great and unmatched wisdom, consider to be off limits, I will totally destroy and obliterate the Economy of Turkey (I’ve done before!). They must, with Europe and others, watch over the captured ISIS fighters and families. The U.S. has done far more than anyone could have ever expected, including the capture of 100% of the ISIS Caliphate. It is time now for others in the region, some of great wealth, to protect their own territory. THE USA IS GREAT!
twitch chat
October 2019

Fortnite that's how Mafia works

twitchquotes: Fortnite. Fortnite. Fortnite. It was all my two kids talked about. They were utterly devoted to it. I had to make a change. I took the controllers and told them they couldn't play until they downloaded Mafia City. They whined and whined, but soon became engrossed in this amazing and educational game. Fortnite soon forgotten, their grades improved rapidly, much like their levels in game. The teachers were amazed, "how do they do it?" they asked me, I simply replied "that's how Mafia works."
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January 2019

Look, kid. You wanna give up?

twitchquotes: Look, πŸ‘€ kid. πŸ‘¦ You πŸ‘ˆ wanna πŸ™ˆ give πŸ‘‰ up? πŸ”Ί Fine. πŸ‘Œ But πŸ‘ you πŸ‘ˆ didn't 🚫 get πŸ”Ÿ here πŸ‘ by 😈 giving 😘 up. πŸ”Ί You πŸ‘ˆ didn't 🚫 get πŸ”Ÿ this πŸ‘ˆ far 🌌 by 😈 giving 😘 up. πŸ”Ί You πŸ‘ˆ didn't 🚫 get πŸ”Ÿ all πŸ’― these πŸ‘ˆ followers, fans, admirers, and πŸ‘ hot πŸ”₯ groupies by 😈 giving 😘 up. πŸ”Ί Don't 🚫 give πŸ‘‰ up. πŸ”Ί You're πŸ‘‰ the πŸ‘ champ. You're πŸ‘‰ the πŸ‘ boshy.
twitch chat
September 2017
MOONMOON

I'm the Server Manager for PinkieCraft, the Pony Roleplay Minecraft server that you play on

Hi (name), I'm the Server Manager for PinkieCraft, the Pony Roleplay Minecraft server that you play on. On behalf of the owner, the staff team and myself, I would like to personally extend my thanks to you for the $1,000 you forked up to help keep our server alive! Our modeler is happily working on the custom pony character that came with the donor package, however I regret to inform you that we don't currently have a way to send you the 20" "horse shaft" you requested but our team is working on it. Once again, thank you sincerely for the donation, and we hope to see you back on the server soon. Best Regards, PinkieCraft Server Manager "Keep on clopping."
September 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing