I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm *** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas
SLEEP TEST
twitchquotes:
SLEEP TEST π IF YOU TOUCH THE BED , GO TO SLEEP β 
twitch chat
Classic
Chat Test
CTRL WTF for Fancy WTF
twitchquotes:
HOLD CTRL AND TYPE "WTF" FOR β±πͺπ·π¬π π¦π£β±
HOLD CTRL AND TYPE "WTF" FOR β±πͺπ·π¬π π¦π£β±
twitch chat
Classic
If you shit in the sink at exactly 4:20 am and yell βamogusβ 69 times
If you shit in the sink at exactly 4:20 am and yell βamogusβ 69 times,a shadowy figured called mom will come to beat you up and you will wake up in a place called the orphanage
Among Us / Amogus
Classic
roleplay with you as your online gf
twitchquotes:
I just have seen your stream and wanted to say that I thought you were super adorable. you donβt know me at all and i know itβs kinda weird. I just thought maybe itβd be fun to roleplay with you as your online gf maybe? I know youβre straight. Iβm a boy thatβs why I was saying roleplay.. this isnβt a troll. again, I know itβs really random and weird. Iβm sorry. It would just be a fun online relationship - nothing serious and I could donate to you and your stream and support you and just be here
twitch chat
Classic
Traveled the entire galaxy trying to find out who asked
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