[Copypasta] Europe is the Eastern USA

twitchquotes: Europe was founded in 1848 by Walker Texas Ranger when he rode a horse across the Atlantic, he called it "Eastern USA" which was eventually abbreviated as just "EU"
twitch chat
March 2014

Classic

EU vs NA

What happened to this ad? :(
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I sexually identify as an Attack Helicopter

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm *** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
November 2014

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I sexually Identify as

Japan heart surgeon and yakuza boss

In Japan πŸ‡―πŸ‡΅ , heart surgeon β€οΈπŸ‘¨β€βš•οΈ . Number one 😭☝️ . Steady handπŸ˜³βœ‹οΈ. One day, Yakuza boss πŸ™‡πŸ»need πŸ†• heartπŸ’˜. I do operationπŸ”ͺβš”οΈ. But, mistake😱! Yakuza boss die😡πŸ˜ͺ! Yakuza very madπŸ‘Ώ. I hideπŸ™ˆ in fishing boatπŸŸπŸš£πŸ»β€β™€οΈ, come to AmericaπŸŽ‡πŸŽŠπŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ. No english🀐, no food😩, no moneyπŸ“‰πŸš«πŸ’². Darryl πŸ‘¨πŸΏgive me jobπŸ™ŒπŸ‘¨πŸ»β€πŸ’Ό. Now I have house🏑, American car πŸš— , and new woman πŸ†•πŸ‘±πŸ»β€β™€οΈ. Darryl πŸ‘¨πŸΏsave lifeβ›‘. My big secretπŸ™Š: I kill ☠️yakuza boss on purpose😈. I good πŸ‘surgeon. The bestπŸ‘ŒπŸ’―!
July 2019

Emoji Pasta

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GME $1000 IS NOT A MEME

πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€ UPVOTE/GILD SO PEOPLE CAN SEE πŸš€πŸš€πŸš€ LISTEN TO ME. DO NOT SELL TOMORROW. OR ANY DAY THIS WEEK. Drops are coming. They are counting on fear to beat us. It’s the only weapon they have on us, but it won’t work because we are retarded. The people are finally taking the power back from these boomer hedge fund big money shorting douchebags - the same people who fucked everyone over in 2008 with CDOs and continue to fuck you over to this day. Get ready to make Melvin throat hard retard dick. We only have strength if we stay in this TOGETHER. HOLD THE LINE. THE SHORT SQUEEZE HASNT HAPPENED YET. Don’t pussy out you fucking idiots. $1000 IS NOT A MEME. I love you all, you beautiful autistic bulls. Hang tight while we ride this thing into the FUCKING STRATOSPHERE. APES TOGETHER STRONG 🦍 πŸ’Ž πŸš€
January 2021

WallStreetBets

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Thinking Emoji

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Hi, my name is Bill Gates and today I’ll teach you how to count to ten

twitchquotes: Hi, my name is Bill Gates and today I’ll teach you how to count to ten: 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10
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October 2014

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Text-to-Speech Playing