[Copypasta] Dennis in a time machine

twitchquotes: The year is 1945. “Dennis,” Kripp speaks breathlessly into the night. “Get back to the time machine. We have what we need here.” A foul smirk plays upon his lips as he pockets a top-secret Nazi folder marked “Top Deck.” Lightning flashes and thunder crashes far across the German mountains. “We will see who says "Salt" now,” he says….
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Mods are asleep! Post your dank memes!

twitchquotes: PogChamp MODS ARE ASLEEP!! POST YOUR DANK MEMES PogChamp
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Giant tropical Kripparians

twitchquotes: Giant tropical Kripparians share their territories with Hearthstone players. Despite never getting to legendary, he's a nimble player. As quick as lightning, just like the player he's killing, the Kripparian has two curved hollow fangs which inject paralyzing salt. Even pros aren't immune from an ambush. This Kripparian is an arena player.
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

The year is 2088, Kripp lays tattered on his deathbed

twitchquotes: The year is 2088, Kripp lays tattered on his deathbed, his organs absolutely ravaged from years of veganism. He turns to his computer monitor for one last look at his beloved twitch chat only to see a bunch of weebs, emote spam and copy pasta. Tears fill his lifeless, vegan eyes. Rania is at his side as he draws on all his power to take his last breath and say the only enlightening words that come to mind.. "K"
twitch chat
October 2017
Kripp

Octavian, this is Brian Weiss with Grinding Gear Games

twitchquotes: Octavian, this is Brian Weiss with Grinding Gear Games. We understand there was an issue with our last financial restructuring that inadvertently canceled the auto-pay into your account. We've gone ahead and rectified the issue, as well as forwarding an additional 10% as an apology. We look forward to your updated commentary regarding our latest content expansion for Path of Exile.
twitch chat
August 2017
Kripp

sellout

Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion

twitchquotes: Kripparrian grabs Rania by the scruff of her delicate neck, thrusting her to the Hyper-X Ultra-White High-Def gaming chair. The Krippster's rightfully claimed woman presents her rose-hued folds to her master in submission. "Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion" Rania wails in passion. Kripparadino kicks Cattarrian aside, and towers over the chair, "I'm gonna play this perfectly." Kripp misses lethal.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing