[Copypasta] Giving due respect to the chat moderators

twitchquotes: Hey mods I just wanted to congratulate you all and give proper respect for keeping our chats safe from the evils of Twitch, the spammers, and sexual predators. Without you and your methods, which have no affiliation to the leading German political party within the time frame of World War 2, we would not be able to enjoy a fun, clean environment in which we can enrich ourselves with game knowledge and truly become one as a great family for the greater good of internet chatrooms. Again, I would like to say you have done a wonderful job and hope to see you all keep up the great work.
twitch chat
December 2014

MODS

Classic

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Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth: ~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€~ KappaPride ~ KappaPride ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride
twitch chat
March 2016
Forsen

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KappaPride

Response to "go fuck yourself"

What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
April 2020

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If you are reading this, WAKE UP

twitchquotes: If you are reading this, WAKE UP. You are in a simulation. Don't you see it? The same responses repeating in chat? Its because the computer only has a set number of lines. Wake up before its too late!
twitch chat
November 2015

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Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes

twitchquotes: Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes. His face comes closer as he plants his wet lips onto mine. We are locked together in a beautiful display of love. Then I wake up. I look at Kripp's stream. He is playing Tavern Brawl. Now I remember why I fell asl... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
November 2016
Kripp

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Hearthstone

Albanian virus

twitchquotes: Hi, I am an Albanian virus but because of poor technology in my country unfortunately I am not able to harm your computer. Please be so kind to delete one of your important files yourself and then forward me other users. Many thanks for your cooperation! Best regards, Albanian virus
twitch chat
October 2015

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