[Copypasta] Shalom my fellow Twitchlings

twitchquotes: Shalom my fellow Twitchlings. My name is Herschel Goldstein, I hail from the ancient land of Israel. In this world there are two superior races: the valiant Japanese and the God-fearing Jews. When I met the great Kripp at Blizzcon 2013, he gave me a piece of advice that I will never forget: "Pentru a da oul omului, îl hrănești pentru o zi. Om învățat de ouă, îl va hrăni pentru o viață întreagă." Translated into foreign devil talk: I am coming Yankee scum. Get on board or get out of the way."
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
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NOT ANOTHER CHILDREN'S CARD GAME

twitchquotes: Kripp sighs sitting at the dinner table. “I have to play hearthstone again, FUCK!” Rania consoles him, “It’s okay sweetheart. I love you.” Kripp responds in tears “I have been having fun playing POE but I only got 6k viewers last night, how will we eat if I don’t play that goddamned Hearthstone for these morons!” Rania wraps her arms around Kripp’s neck, “It’s okay baby, it’ll be different, when Artifact comes out!” Kripp lets out a scream, “NOT ANOTHER FUCKING CHILDREN’S CARD GAME!”
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Artifact

Tanner's life continues its downward spiral

twitchquotes: After his shift at McDonald's, Tanner sits alone in his dark, dingy apartment, waiting for Kripp's stream to begin. As soon as Kripp's face appears, he begins one of his tirades, insulting and mocking Kripp, the happily-married, multi-millionaire video game streaming sensation. "That'll show him", Tanner mutters to himself, as his life continues its downward spiral.
twitch chat
December 2018
Kripp

Tanner from High School

A severe lack of cute emotes in chat

twitchquotes: Konichiwa Kripp-kun AYAYA . This is your kawaii kouhai Aya-chan, calling in from Nihon. I have noticed a severe lack of cute emotes in chat tonight, and instead all I see are baka dansgame and baka nammers. This is not very sugoi, and I would appreciate it if your chat showed more respect for Japanese culture by typing kawaii emotes like AYAYA and AstolfoSmile . Arigato gozaimasu <3
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Weebs

Classic

Only the saltiest one can hold both salts

twitchquotes: PJSalt ___ PJSalt only the saltiest one can hold both salt cans ⎝ Kappa ⎠
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

The Picture

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, Micheal here. Yes, your highschool boyfriend. I still have our private picture. "The picture". If you dont want this to be posted on internet - send me your cat.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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