guys why when a woman gets a vibrator, its seen as a bit of naughty fun. BUT when a guy orders a 240 Volt FuckMaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6 speed pulsating ***, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collection tray, together with optional built in realistic orgasm scream surround sound system, hes called a pervert?
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More Classic Copypastas
Vegan Propaganda
twitchquotes:
Howdy Kripp, my name is Bill and I work in the meat industry. I'm getting pretty sick and tired of all the vegan propaganda you're spreading on this here livestream. You rave about the health benefits of becoming a leaf-muncher, but look at you! You're a pale, scrawny, hallowed-out husk of a man. Hell, you probably can't even lift up a hamburger with those pitiful arms of yours. If you don't stop hating on meat, I'm gonna come by in my truck and force-feed you my "giant sausage!"
Howdy Kripp, my name is Bill and I work in the meat industry. I'm getting pretty sick and tired of all the vegan propaganda you're spreading on this here livestream. You rave about the health benefits of becoming a leaf-muncher, but look at you! You're a pale, scrawny, hallowed-out husk of a man. Hell, you probably can't even lift up a hamburger with those pitiful arms of yours. If you don't stop hating on meat, I'm gonna come by in my truck and force-feed you my "giant sausage!"
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
"Based"? Are "Based"? Are you fucking kidding me?
"Based"? Are you fucking kidding me? I spent a decent portion of my life writing all of that and your response to me is "Based"? Are you so mentally handicapped that the only word you can comprehend is "Based" - or are you just some fucking asshole who thinks that with such a short response, he can make a statement about how meaningless what was written was? Well, I'll have you know that what I wrote was NOT meaningless, in fact, I even had my written work proof-read by several professors of literature. Don't believe me? I doubt you would, and your response to this will probably be "Based" once again. Do I give a fuck? No, does it look like I give even the slightest fuck about five fucking letters? I bet you took the time to type those five letters too, I bet you sat there and chuckled to yourself for 20 hearty seconds before pressing "send". You're so fucking pathetic. I'm honestly considering directing you to a psychiatrist, but I'm simply far too nice to do something like that. You, however, will go out of your way to make a fool out of someone by responding to a well-thought-out, intelligent, or humorous statement that probably took longer to write than you can last in bed with a chimpanzee. What do I have to say to you? Absolutely nothing. I couldn't be bothered to respond to such a worthless attempt at a response. Do you want "Based" on your gravestone?
Based
Classic
Attention all Fortnite gamers
twitchquotes:
Attention all Fortnite gamers: John Wick is in great danger and he needs your help to wipe out the squads in the Tilted Towers, but to do this he needs a golden scar and a couple of chug jugs. To help him, all he needs is your credit card number, the three digits on the back, and the expiration month and year. But, you gotta be quick, so John Wick can secure the bag and achieve the epic Victory Royal!
twitch chat
Classic
Fortnite
Riot's MIGHT SPAGHETTI CODE of elo hell
twitchquotes:
IF YOU SEE THIS MESSAGE WHILE SCROLLING, Riot's MI瞳蛣G虆虅铜艇虘虌蛦H虄虅叹虄通蛼T虉虗通虌蛫彤Y虓虅蛣 通虆蛣S虄停蛬蜅桐P虆童虋虖虒A蛺虙G炭HE虃虗蛯T蛡炭虘瞳T亭彤艇I叹蛫庭虌蛫 虄虒C挺探O同挺D處虖E蛫通虋童蛺停虇 蜅蛬虊虇挺探o虜虘虗蛫虄虇f虛蛯同 虘桐停亭el虊o虙同蜅虤亭 亭童蛯桐h炭亭e蛼虌虙虅l酮處叹虂蛫l虁蛬虤虋 has leaked onto your computer. Bug splats and lost elo will come to you unless you COPY and PASTA this message 3 times
IF YOU SEE THIS MESSAGE WHILE SCROLLING, Riot's MI瞳蛣G虆虅铜艇虘虌蛦H虄虅叹虄通蛼T虉虗通虌蛫彤Y虓虅蛣 通虆蛣S虄停蛬蜅桐P虆童虋虖虒A蛺虙G炭HE虃虗蛯T蛡炭虘瞳T亭彤艇I叹蛫庭虌蛫 虄虒C挺探O同挺D處虖E蛫通虋童蛺停虇 蜅蛬虊虇挺探o虜虘虗蛫虄虇f虛蛯同 虘桐停亭el虊o虙同蜅虤亭 亭童蛯桐h炭亭e蛼虌虙虅l酮處叹虂蛫l虁蛬虤虋 has leaked onto your computer. Bug splats and lost elo will come to you unless you COPY and PASTA this message 3 times
twitch chat
Riot Games
Classic
League of Legends
we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce
gf is prego
we like to get kinky anyways
one night things get particularly saucy
i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights
wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period
i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering
ohshitohshitohshitohshit
i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital
she's still bleeding everywhere
by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent
oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state
storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything
he takes one look at ther and says
"sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do"
"WHY THE FUCK NOT???"
"we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"