[Copypasta] Naughty fun

guys why when a woman gets a vibrator, its seen as a bit of naughty fun. BUT when a guy orders a 240 Volt FuckMaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6 speed pulsating ***, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collection tray, together with optional built in realistic orgasm scream surround sound system, hes called a pervert?
April 2014

Classic

(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers

"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers, rather it is advice for them. When participating in intense periods of gaming, the human hand has a tendency to get sweaty. The sweat causes the hand to become slick, and it b becomes more difficult to retain a grip on the gamers gaming mouse, thus making it more difficult to perform well in intense gaming moments. By touching grass with the gamers hand, the grass will impart a layer of particulate onto the gamers hand, the particulate can be made of a variety of dusts, dirts and other natural matter. This particulate will then act in a similar form to climbers chalk, absorbing the sweat and drying out the gamers hand. With dry hands, the gamer can now perform to their maximum when gaming. This is why when an enemy or teammate tells you to touch grass, they are simply trying to assist you in performing better.
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Is that all you shitposting fucks can say?!

Is that all you shitposting fucks can say?!? Duurrhhlll... Based, based, cringe, cringe, based, based, cringe, cringe, cringe, based, cringe... I feel like I'm in a FUCKING asylum full of dementia-ridden old people that can do nothing but repeat the same FUCKING words on loop like a fucking broken record!!! Cringe cringe cringe cringe!!! Cringe, based, based! Onions? Onions, SNOYY!! Onions L O L onions! Cringe, BOOMER?? Le zoomer, I am BOOMER!!! No zoom zoom zoomies!! Zoomer going zoomies!! YnnnggGGHHAAHH I..FUCKING hate the internet so god DAMN much... FUCK! Shitposting, honest to...god...fucking hope your mother CHOKES on her own feces in hell you...COCK SUCKER. But oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh I know my post is CRINGE!! ISN'T IT??? Cringe, cringe, CRINGEY cringe, based, cringe, based, REDDIT?? CRINGE!! BASED? CRINGE!! ZOOM?? CRINGE!! ONIONS?? REDDIT, BASED....BASED!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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Rick Astley paradox

twitchquotes: If you ask Rick Astley for a DVD of the movie Up, he won’t give it to you because he’s never gonna give you Up. However, by not giving you Up like you asked for it, he’s letting you down. This is known as the Astley paradox.
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I will now transform this human into a cat

twitchquotes: I WILL NOW TRANSFORM THIS HUMAN INTO A CAT╰( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆ -> -> -> Kappa Keepo CoolCat
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"Based"? Are "Based"? Are you fucking kidding me?

"Based"? Are you fucking kidding me? I spent a decent portion of my life writing all of that and your response to me is "Based"? Are you so mentally handicapped that the only word you can comprehend is "Based" - or are you just some fucking asshole who thinks that with such a short response, he can make a statement about how meaningless what was written was? Well, I'll have you know that what I wrote was NOT meaningless, in fact, I even had my written work proof-read by several professors of literature. Don't believe me? I doubt you would, and your response to this will probably be "Based" once again. Do I give a fuck? No, does it look like I give even the slightest fuck about five fucking letters? I bet you took the time to type those five letters too, I bet you sat there and chuckled to yourself for 20 hearty seconds before pressing "send". You're so fucking pathetic. I'm honestly considering directing you to a psychiatrist, but I'm simply far too nice to do something like that. You, however, will go out of your way to make a fool out of someone by responding to a well-thought-out, intelligent, or humorous statement that probably took longer to write than you can last in bed with a chimpanzee. What do I have to say to you? Absolutely nothing. I couldn't be bothered to respond to such a worthless attempt at a response. Do you want "Based" on your gravestone?
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