[Copypasta] Ebettle

twitchquotes: I was offered sex today, with a 21 year old girl. In exchange for that, I was supposed to advertise some kind of e-betting website to my friends. Of course I declined because I am a person of high moral standards with a strong willpower. Just as strong as Ebettle, the best betting website on the internet. Now available for children.
twitch chat
March 2015

sellout

Classic

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

Secret Puerto Rican lover

twitchquotes: Hola, Kripp, this is Antonio, Rania's secret Puerto Rican lover. I mistakenly left a package of my Magnum XXL Heavy-Duty Condoms at your place last night while you were complaining about a children's card game. I was hoping I could swing by tonight and pick them up. I'll just go in through the backdoor just like how I do with Rania, the dirty girl! Thanks, and good luck with your funny little computer game!
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Classic

Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth: ~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€~ KappaPride ~ KappaPride ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride ใ€€ ใ€€ใ€€ใ€€~ KappaPride
twitch chat
March 2016
Forsen

Classic

KappaPride

CTRL+C CTRL+V ENTER

twitchquotes: You idly watching the stream, mindlessly wasting yet another evening. You notice 4+ length message in the chat. Grabbing the mouse, hovering over, scrolling up. Reading the message and realizing the pasta has no meaning at all. CTRL+C CTRL+V ENTER. You are retarded.
twitch chat
July 2020

Classic

Navy Seal

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
April 2019

Classic

Navy Seal

"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers

"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers, rather it is advice for them. When participating in intense periods of gaming, the human hand has a tendency to get sweaty. The sweat causes the hand to become slick, and it b becomes more difficult to retain a grip on the gamers gaming mouse, thus making it more difficult to perform well in intense gaming moments. By touching grass with the gamers hand, the grass will impart a layer of particulate onto the gamers hand, the particulate can be made of a variety of dusts, dirts and other natural matter. This particulate will then act in a similar form to climbers chalk, absorbing the sweat and drying out the gamers hand. With dry hands, the gamer can now perform to their maximum when gaming. This is why when an enemy or teammate tells you to touch grass, they are simply trying to assist you in performing better.
July 2021

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing