twitchquotes:
Sometimes I like to put 9 towels into my anus and pretend I'm Ahri. Please no coperino and pasra macaroni, thank you! Sorry for bad England, I walk many Egyption miles to come watch.
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(βΜΏΔΉΜ―ββ¬β΄β¬β΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Classic Copypastas
Pickpocket hot tip
twitchquotes:
Hot tip: When someone yells pickpocket start searching for your wallet in the groin area and exclaim 'Thank God my wallet is safely tucked between my testicles'. The pickpocket will see this and assume that the wallet is there. These people usually have very supple and delicate hands so when they try to take your wallet you will instead get a pleasant fondling to your genital area.
twitch chat
Classic
ASCENDED invisible spam
twitchquotes:
ASCENDED invisible spam ββ ββββ β β β βββββββ β β β β β β β ββββ ββ ββ βββββββ β ββββββ β β β β β ββ βββ ββ ββββ β β β β ββββ β β β βββββββ β β β β β β β ββββ ββ ββ βββββββ β ββββββ β β β β β ββ βββ ββ ββββ β β β β ββββ β β β βββββββ β β β β β β β ββββ ββ ββ βββββββ β ββββββ β β β β β ββ βββ ββ ββββ β β β β ββββ β β β βββββββ β β β β β β β ββββ ββ ββ βββββββ β ββββββ β β β β β ββ βββ ββ ββββ β β 
twitch chat
Classic
I fucked Up DVD
Earlier today I was really horny, and I saw what I thought to be a blank DVD. I thought, DVDs have a tight hole, they might feel pretty good. So I put my soft pp into the hole of the DVD, and for a few seconds as I started getting harder, it felt pretty good, but then, once I was fully erect, it started being painful. My pp was stuck in the DVD, and I had to break it in half to get if out. It was then when I flipped the broken DVD over and realized that it was not a blank DVD, but a copy of the Pixar movie Up.. Well guys, guess I fucked up.
Classic
GME to the moon
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.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγοΎγββγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγβοΈif we holdγγ.
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γβββγγγ,γγγγγγγγγγγββββπ gme γγγγ γγ,γγγ β β β β γ
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γγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγβγβββββββββββγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγΛγ
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γβγγγγγ.γγγγ π γγγγγβββγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγ.γ
ΛγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγοΎγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
γγβγ π β β if we sell β β β β β β β ,γ γγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*
.γγγγγβγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγ β¦
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βγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
WallStreetBets
Classic
Greetings Kripp, I am Dr. Hannibal Lector
twitchquotes:
ΰΌΌ γ€ Ν‘ Ν‘Β° Ν Κ Ν‘ Ν‘Β° ΰΌ½γ€ Greetings Kripp, I am Dr. Hannibal Lector, renowned Psychiatrist based in Baltimore, Maryland. I have heard you are the saltiest man alive, I am intrigued by a man of your... tastes. I would like to invite you for... dinner. ΰΌΌ γ€ Ν‘ Ν‘Β° Ν Κ Ν‘ Ν‘Β° ΰΌ½γ€
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Kripp