[Copypasta] Only the chosen one can hold his donger

twitchquotes: 8=====> Only the chosen one can hold his donger โŽ PogChamp โŽ 
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February 2016

Classic

I used to be a real ad
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You've been gnomed

โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–—โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–—โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ƒโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–ƒโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ƒโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ƒโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–“ โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–“ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘
ascii art
October 2018

Classic

Shrek

โข€โกดโ ‘โก„โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃ€โฃ€โฃคโฃคโฃคโฃ€โก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ ธโก‡โ €โ ฟโก€โ €โ €โ €โฃ€โกดโขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃฆโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ‘โข„โฃ โ พโ โฃ€โฃ„โกˆโ ™โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃ†โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โข€โก€โ โ €โ €โ ˆโ ™โ ›โ ‚โ ˆโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ฟโกฟโขฟโฃ†โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โข€โกพโฃโฃ€โ €โ ดโ ‚โ ™โฃ—โก€โ €โขปโฃฟโฃฟโ ญโขคโฃดโฃฆโฃคโฃนโ €โ €โ €โข€โขดโฃถโฃ† โ €โ €โข€โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃฎโฃฝโฃพโฃฟโฃฅโฃดโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโข‚โ ”โขšโกฟโขฟโฃฟโฃฆโฃดโฃพโ โ ธโฃผโกฟ โ €โข€โกžโ โ ™โ ปโ ฟโ Ÿโ ‰โ €โ ›โขนโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃŒโขคโฃผโฃฟโฃพโฃฟโกŸโ ‰โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โฃพโฃทโฃถโ ‡โ €โ €โฃคโฃ„โฃ€โก€โ ˆโ ปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ ‰โ ˆโ ‰โ €โ €โขฆโกˆโขปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃถโฃถโฃถโฃถโฃคโฃฝโกนโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ‰โ ฒโฃฝโกปโขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃœโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โขธโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃถโฃฎโฃญโฃฝโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃ€โฃ€โฃˆโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ƒโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ นโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ Ÿโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ‰โ ›โ ปโ ฟโ ฟโ ฟโ ฟโ ›โ ‰
ascii art
November 2018

Shrek

Classic

You need a high IQ to understand Rick and Morty

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick and Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existencial catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. ๐Ÿ˜‚ And yes by the way, I DO have a Rick and Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
September 2017

Rick and Morty

Classic

Japan heart surgeon and yakuza boss

In Japan ๐Ÿ‡ฏ๐Ÿ‡ต , heart surgeon โค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘จโ€โš•๏ธ . Number one ๐Ÿ˜ญโ˜๏ธ . Steady hand๐Ÿ˜ณโœ‹๏ธ. One day, Yakuza boss ๐Ÿ™‡๐Ÿปneed ๐Ÿ†• heart๐Ÿ’˜. I do operation๐Ÿ”ชโš”๏ธ. But, mistake๐Ÿ˜ฑ! Yakuza boss die๐Ÿ˜ต๐Ÿ˜ช! Yakuza very mad๐Ÿ‘ฟ. I hide๐Ÿ™ˆ in fishing boat๐ŸŸ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ, come to America๐ŸŽ‡๐ŸŽŠ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ. No english๐Ÿค, no food๐Ÿ˜ฉ, no money๐Ÿ“‰๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿ’ฒ. Darryl ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿฟgive me job๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿปโ€๐Ÿ’ผ. Now I have house๐Ÿก, American car ๐Ÿš— , and new woman ๐Ÿ†•๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ. Darryl ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿฟsave lifeโ›‘. My big secret๐Ÿ™Š: I kill โ˜ ๏ธyakuza boss on purpose๐Ÿ˜ˆ. I good ๐Ÿ‘surgeon. The best๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ’ฏ!
July 2019

Emoji Pasta

Classic

Math is "mental abuse to humans"

twitchquotes: You know how some people say that math is โ€œmental abuse to humansโ€? Well, lemme tell you one thing: โ€œMathโ€ is an abbreviation for โ€œmathematicsโ€, so youโ€™re only looking at 36% of the whole thing. What does the other 64% stand for? It stands for โ€œexcept mostly at truly intelligently cool studentsโ€! That means, if you think math is mentally abusing you, youโ€™re not truly intelligent or cool! Youโ€™re dumb and lame! So the next time someone gives you the first 36% of this ridiculous acronym, give them the other 64%. Donโ€™t forget to tell them that they suck at etymology.
twitch chat
October 2020

Classic

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