[Copypasta] I dream of becoming a carrot

twitchquotes: I dream of becoming a carrot. When I'm home alone I dig holes in the backyard and stand in them, put lettuce on top of my head from sun up to sun down. I would steal sun tan spray from stores and use it until I turned a bright orange. People tell me it's impossible for me to be a carrot but I know I can be anything I want to be.
twitch chat
May 2016

Classic

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

Kripp's gotta hit up the bathroom

twitchquotes: "Give me a second, guys," Kripp says. "Gotta hit up the bathroom" He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately gives Dex a swift kick down the stairs. As Dex yelps loudly in pain, Kripp overturns the nearest chair, yelling "Fuck this game!" as loudly as he can. Rania tries to calm him down, but Kripp swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Kripp wipes the blood off of his face, sits back down at his computer, and resumes his stream.
twitch chat
January 2018
Kripp

Classic

Leeroy Jenkins created a strategy

twitchquotes: Leeroy Jenkins created a strategy that revolved around trying to defeat your opponent in one turn without requiring any cards on the board. Fighting for board control and battles between minions make an overall game of Hearthstone more fun and compelling, but taking 20+ damage in one turn is not particularly fun or interactive.
twitch chat
May 2017

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Hearthstone

YOU DON'T GET TO TENTACLE ME OCTO-CHAN!

twitchquotes: β§Ήβ•²βŽβ§Ή PunOko βŽ β•±β§ΈβŽ  Squid1 Squid3 Squid2 Squid4 YOU DON'T GET TO TENTACLE ME OCTO-CHAN! β§Ήβ•²βŽβ§Ή PunOko βŽ β•±β§ΈβŽ 
twitch chat
July 2017

Weebs

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Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth

twitchquotes: Meanwhile in Forsen's mouth: ~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€ ~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€~ KappaPride ~ KappaPride γ€€ γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride γ€€ γ€€γ€€γ€€~ KappaPride
twitch chat
March 2016
Forsen

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KappaPride

Jeff Bezos vs Elon Musk

Jeff Bezos -Bald -Exwife took half his networth -Second richest person Elon Musk -Grew back full head of hair -Has girlfriend, allegedly had a threesome with Amber Heard and Cara Delevingne -Richest person TSLA > AMZN
January 2021

WallStreetBets

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Text-to-Speech Playing