[Copypasta] I dream of becoming a carrot

twitchquotes: I dream of becoming a carrot. When I'm home alone I dig holes in the backyard and stand in them, put lettuce on top of my head from sun up to sun down. I would steal sun tan spray from stores and use it until I turned a bright orange. People tell me it's impossible for me to be a carrot but I know I can be anything I want to be.
twitch chat
May 2016

Classic

Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Classic Copypastas

DrDisrespect shungite

Anyways, um... I bought a whole bunch of shungite rocks, do you know what shungite is? Anybody know what shungite is? No, not Suge Knight, I think he's locked up in prison. I'm talkin' shungite. Anyways, it's a two billion year-old like, rock stone that protects against frequencies and unwanted frequencies that may be traveling in the air. That's my story, I bought a whole bunch of stuff. Put 'em around the la casa. Little pyramids, stuff like that.
May 2020
DrDisRespectLIVE

Classic

Shungite

You've been gnomed

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October 2018

Classic

My idiot boyfriend spent my college fund on dog coins how do I get it back???

He talked me into spending the $8500 I have on dog coins because something was supposed to happen yesterday which would have given us more money?? but it didn't actually happen or got canceled or something I don't really know or understand how it works but I went to the dog coin site to withdraw my money and there is only about $6700 of it there, where is the rest of it? I tried looking at the faq but don't really get it
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

Fuck You Chat

β „β’Έβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ ›β ›β ƒβ’Έβ£Ώβ‘‡β „β „β£Ώβ‘‡β „β£Όβ£Ώβ Ÿβ »β£Ώβ£†β „β£Ώβ£Ώβ’ β£Ύβ£Ώβ ‹β „β „ ⠄Ⓒ⣿⣷⣢⣢⠄Ⓒ⣿⑇⠄⠄⣿⑇⠄⣿⑏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄ β „β’Έβ£Ώβ‘‡β „β „β „β ˜β£Ώβ£§β£€β£°β£Ώβ‘‡β „β’Ώβ£Ώβ£€β£ β£Ώβ‘Άβ „β£Ώβ£Ώβ ƒβ’Ήβ£Ώβ£†β „β „ β „β ˜β ›β ƒβ „β „β „β „β ˜β ›β ›β ›β ‹β „β „β ˆβ ›β ›β ›β ›β β „β ›β ›β „β „β ›β ›β ƒβ „ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⒠⣀⑄⠄⠄⣀⣀⠄⒀⣠⣀⣄⑀⠄⒠⣀⑄⠄⠄⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ β „β „β „β „β „β’»β£Ώβ£„β£Όβ£Ώβ ƒβ£°β£Ώβ Ÿβ ›β’Ώβ£Ώβ‘„β’Έβ£Ώβ‘‡β „β „β£Ώβ£Ώβ „β „β „β „β „ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⣿⑿⠁⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄Ⓒ⣿⑇Ⓒ⣿⑇⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⑇⠄⠄⠹⣿⣦⣀⣼⣿⠃⠄⣿⣷⣀⣴⣿⑏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β ›β ƒβ „β „β „β ˆβ ›β ›β ‹β β „β „β ˆβ ™β ›β ›β ‰β „β „β „β „β „β „ ⠄⠄⒀⣠⣀⣀⣄⑀⠄⣀⣀⠄⠄⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⑄⠄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄ β „β „β£Ύβ£Ώβ ‹β ™β Ώβ —β „β£Ώβ£Ώβ£€β£€β£Ώβ£Ώβ „β „β£Έβ£Ώβ’Ώβ£·β „β ›β ›β£Ώβ£Ώβ ›β ›β „β „ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⣀⠄⠄⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⠄⒠⣿⣏⣸⣿⑆⠄⠄⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄ β „β „β »β£Ώβ£¦β£΄β£Ώβ‘Ÿβ „β£Ώβ£Ώβ „β „β£Ώβ£Ώβ „β£Όβ£Ώβ Ώβ Ώβ’Ώβ£Ώβ‘€β „β£Ώβ£Ώβ „β „β „β „ β „β „β „β ˆβ ‰β ‰β ‰β „β „β ‰β ‰β „β „β ‰β ‰β „β ‰β ‰β „β „β ˆβ ‰β β „β ‰β ‰β „β „β „β „
June 2019

Classic

I hate Twitch Chat

My laptop gets hot when chat is spammed

twitchquotes: Guys can you please not spam the chat. My mom bought me this new laptop and it gets really hot when the chat is being spamed. Now my leg is starting to hurt because it is getting so hot. Please, if you don't want me to get burned, then dont spam the chat
twitch chat
August 2014

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing