[Copypasta] Romanian Salt Baron

twitchquotes: POLICE REPORT - Canadian Mounties have at last apprehended the "Romanian Salt Baron" after suspiciously salty whining was heard outside of a dingy apartment in Toronto. The Salt Baron, a morose, balding gypsy man, was at the time playing a children's card game when Mounties burst through the door. The man attempted to resist by "brofisting" the officials, but his scrawny vegan arms had no effect. The man's wife then assumed her true Succubus form and escaped into the Nether. More at 11.
twitch chat
July 2016
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Hi Kripp, Google again here

twitchquotes: Kripp, Google again here. We've noticed that you've been away from Twitch for at least 2 minutes in the past. We're just wondering if everything is okay. Is it still the merchandise? We're serious about raising the price if it's a problem to you. We just want you to have fun, and to of course buy more Twitch merchandise. Our Viewbots are ready to bring you (mostly us) much ad revenue. Thank you Kripp, hope to see you soon
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Viewbots

Salt is not just a commodity, it is a way of life

twitchquotes: Hailing from the Morosan line from Romania, Octavian "Kripparian" Morosan has, instead of taking on the family business, opted to play a children's card game until three in the morning everyday. His pursuits to seperate himself from the mineral have only made the dynasty wealthier than it has ever been. On Octavian's stream, salt is not just a commodity, it is a way of life...
twitch chat
April 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp you're a good-for-nothing bully

twitchquotes: Kripp, this behavior of yours is disgusting and honestly makes me want to unsubscribe from you. You're a grown man who apparently has to beat up 12 year old free to play players just for a cheap laugh. I don't know who you think you are, but now I know that you're nothing but a good-for-nothing bully.
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

I saw Kripp at the tavern yesterday

twitchquotes: I saw Kripp at the tavern yesterday. I told him it would be cool to see him play arena again. He said, โ€œWhy, so you can snipe me at 8 wins?โ€ I was taken aback, and all I could say was โ€œHuh?โ€ but he kept cutting me off and going โ€œhuh? huh? huh?โ€ and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I thought he was going for a brofist, so I extended my hand only to have it slapped away in disgust. Later on I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen murlocs in his hands without paying.
twitch chat
May 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp is censoring his chat

twitchquotes: TheIlluminati Kripp is censoring his chat. Don't believe me? Look at this: Kripp is a โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ. Kripp is โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ out to g2a. Kripp is a blizzard โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ TheIlluminati SPREAD THE TRUTH TheIlluminati
twitch chat
February 2017
Kripp
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