[Copypasta] Romanian Salt Baron

twitchquotes: POLICE REPORT - Canadian Mounties have at last apprehended the "Romanian Salt Baron" after suspiciously salty whining was heard outside of a dingy apartment in Toronto. The Salt Baron, a morose, balding gypsy man, was at the time playing a children's card game when Mounties burst through the door. The man attempted to resist by "brofisting" the officials, but his scrawny vegan arms had no effect. The man's wife then assumed her true Succubus form and escaped into the Nether. More at 11.
twitch chat
July 2016
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
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Alright students, how often is Kripp lucky?

twitchquotes: (⌐ Ν‘β–’ ΝœΚ– Ν‘β–’) Alright students, how often is Kripp lucky? γƒ½ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½οΎ‰ Call on me! (⌐ Ν‘β–’ ΝœΚ– Ν‘β–’) Yes little Dong? γƒ½ΰΌΌΰΊˆΩ„ΝœΰΊˆΰΌ½οΎ‰ Kripp is never lucky, sir! (⌐ Ν‘β–’ ΝœΚ– Ν‘β–’) Wrong, Kripp is lucky a reasonable amount of time. Come see me after class for your punishment . Κ•βŒ Ν‘β–’ ͜α΄₯ Ν‘β–’Κ”
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

I'm gonna play this perfectly. Kripp misses lethal.

twitchquotes: Kripparrian grabs Rania by the scruff of her delicate neck, thrusting her to the Hyper-X Ultra-White High-Def gaming chair. The Krippster's rightfully claimed woman presents her rose-hued folds to her master in submission. "Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion" Rania wails in passion. Kripparadino kicks Cattarrian aside, and towers over the chair, "I'm gonna play this perfectly." Kripp misses lethal.
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

VEGAN MAN

twitchquotes: VEGAN MAN 🌊 😍 Take me by the hand βœ‹ lead me to the spam that you understand πŸ™Œ 🌊 VEGAN MAN 🌊 😍 The voyage 🚲 to the top of the 🌎deck is a real trip πŸ‘Œ 🌊 VEGAN MAN 🌊 😍 The crust of a Romanian man πŸ‘³ fueled by the banned πŸ‘ Soaking up the πŸ’¦ salt in the spam πŸ’―
twitch chat
September 2016
Kripp

Emoji Pasta

Hey Kripp, this is Jessica from Vegan Heritage Corp

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, this is Jessica from Vegan Heritage Corp. We scanned our ancestry data-base and it appears you're related to the dinosaur known as Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur from 194 B.C We have tried contacting him, but it appears he died from a giant 'Meat-eor' sent from Villa the Spaghettisaurus from space. We fear he's making giant meatballs again, we recommend going carnivorous or earth could be doomed again!
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hello Mr Kripp, I Am Master Diamond Rank 1 In Kosovo

twitchquotes: Hello Mr Kripp, I Am Master Diamond Rank 1 In Kosovo. My Skills Are Getting Stronker And I Wish To Join Team "TMS". My Land Has Endured Many Harsh Winters And My Cow Died Last Fall. I Am How You Say, "Hard In A Place," And Am Looking to One Day Be Best At Heartstone For My Mother Says I Have The Heart Of The Carderinos.
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

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