[Copypasta] Romanian Salt Baron

twitchquotes: POLICE REPORT - Canadian Mounties have at last apprehended the "Romanian Salt Baron" after suspiciously salty whining was heard outside of a dingy apartment in Toronto. The Salt Baron, a morose, balding gypsy man, was at the time playing a children's card game when Mounties burst through the door. The man attempted to resist by "brofisting" the officials, but his scrawny vegan arms had no effect. The man's wife then assumed her true Succubus form and escaped into the Nether. More at 11.
twitch chat
July 2016
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Don't just feel casual look casual!

twitchquotes: COMING SOON!! Casual wear by Kripparian! Don't just feel casual look casual! Just pay the low low price of 4.99$ a month. And you took can look and act like a casual! Order now and get a free brofist!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Interactive Game

twitchquotes: ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮ Hey Kripp, here's an "interactive game" for you. ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp paints and is one off lethal

twitchquotes: Discovering his inner-passion for painting, Kripp leaves Twitch for good and takes Rania and Dex on the road with him to pursue his dream. After six months Kripp realizes being an artist is a lot harder than playing video games. But it’s too late. Homeless and starving, Rania hates Kripp, Dex hates Kripp, and, worst of all, Kripp hates Kripp. Buying a gun one rainy day, he puts it in his mouth and pulls the trigger. click He forgot to buy bullets. “One off lethal,” Rania sobs.
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

Sniper Guild recruiter here

twitchquotes: Sniper Guild recruiter here TheIlluminati . Our mighty organization of hundreds of Sniparrians is in need of new initiates who can infiltrate the Kripparrians stream. A minimum experience of two snipes is required. Do not worry about time delays or snitches, our buddy Drivezy has you covered. We hope you will consider joining us in our quest to defeat Kripparrian
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Teddy Roosevelt messages Kripp

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, This is Teddy Roosevelt calling! I am concerned that you have formed a monopoly on the hearthstone section of twitch dot telly. You must renounce this darkness immediately or I will SMITE YOU like I did Andre Carnegie and Nelson Rockemsockem. You must give up your monopolistic ways or face the mighty wrath of the White House and the US Judicial system. Much love to Rania and the baby. Regards, yo boi TD
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing