[Copypasta] Is today the day when I finally end it all?

twitchquotes: VoteYea VoteNay Is today the day when I should finally end it all? โŽ FeelsGoodMan ๐Ÿ”ซ
twitch chat
August 2016
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Alright, ocean mage, I guess

twitchquotes: ResidentSleeper โ€œAlright, ocean mage, I guessโ€ ResidentSleeper โ€œHavenโ€™t picked moist magician in a while, letโ€™s go wet wizard ResidentSleeper โ€œhydro conjuror isnโ€™t that good, but alrightโ€ ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
December 2019

Teamfight Tactics

Not funny I didn't laugh

Not funny I didn't laugh. Your joke is so bad I would have preferred the joke went over my head and you gave up re-telling me the joke. To be honest this is a horrid attempt at trying to get a laugh out of me. Not a chuckle, not a hehe, not even a subtle burst of air out of my esophagus. Science says before you laugh your brain preps your face muscles but I didn't even feel the slightest twitch. 0/10 this joke is so bad I cannot believe anyone legally allowed you to be creative at all. The amount of brain power you must have put into that joke has the potential to power every house on Earth. Get a personality and learn how to make jokes, read a book. I'm not saying this to be funny I genuinely mean it on how this is just bottom barrel embarrassment at comedy. You've single handedly killed humor and every comedic act on the planet. I'm so disappointed that society has failed as a whole in being able to teach you how to be funny. Honestly if I put in all my power and time to try and make your joke funny it would require Einstein himself to build a device to strap me into so I can be connected to the energy of a billion stars to do it, and even then all that joke would get from people is a subtle scuff. You're lucky I still have the slightest of empathy for you after telling that joke otherwise I would have committed every war crime in the book just to prevent you from attempting any humor ever again. We should put that joke in text books so future generations can be wary of becoming such an absolute comedic failure. Im disappointed, hurt, and outright offended that my precious time has been wasted in my brain understanding that joke. In the time that took I was planning on helping kids who have been orphaned, but because of that you've waisted my time explaining the obscene integrity of your terrible attempt at comedy. Now those kids are suffering without meals and there's nobody to blame but you. I hope you're happy with what you have done and I truly hope you can move on and learn from this piss poor attempt
September 2019

Classic

Smartest Man in Existence

twitchquotes: When I was in school I used to have an IQ of 15. My classmates used to harass me for not being that smart. But since 2013, my life has changed. My IQ is now 195 and it increases by 5 every time I sit down on Saturday nights to watch this one show. It is called Rick and Morty. Because of that, I get all the girls and people are always comparing me to Albert Einstein, some even say that I am the cure for cancer. When the government found out that I watch Rick and Morty, they showed up to my residence and took me to a secret facility to take an exam. The exam was about explaining all the jokes in Rick and Morty and I had to answer each question in all currently spoken languages. Since I watched Rick and Morty, I didn't have any problems and I completed it in 30 minutes. The next day, I got to see the results and I passed the exam with a score of 100%. They gave me the title "Smartest Man in Existence". Guess I am out of this world.
twitch chat
October 2017

Rick and Morty

Kripp's IQ is officially more than 1000

twitchquotes: nice win man you totally outplayed him on every level, every single play you did showed a whole new level of skill and meta beyond our mortal brains understandings, i have no idea how its even humanly possible to be so amazing at this card game as you are Kripp, your IQ is officially more than 1000
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

Just me and EA hanging out

twitchquotes: Just me and ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’•EA๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’ฐ, hanging out I wanted some Star Wars๐ŸŒŸ so I started to pout ๐Ÿ˜ž He asked if I was down โฌ‡for something yummy ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ† and I asked what and he said he'd give me his ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ฆlooties!๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฐ Yeah! Yeah!๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’ฆ I earn them!๐Ÿ’ฆ I buy them!๐Ÿ’ฆ I purchase them whole๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฐ ๐Ÿ˜ It makes ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’˜EA๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’ฐ ๐Ÿ˜Šhappy๐Ÿ˜Š so it's my only goal... ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ˜ซHarder EA! Harder EA! ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’• 1 lootie๐Ÿ’ฆ, 2 lootie๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ, 3 lootie๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ, 4๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ฆ I'm ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’˜EA's๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’ฐ ๐Ÿ‘‘Disney princess ๐Ÿ‘‘but I'm also a consumer whore! ๐Ÿ’Ÿ He makes me OP๐Ÿ’—!He makes me feel good๐Ÿ’œ! ๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜He makes me feel everything a whale should!~ ๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ‘‘๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’˜Wa-What!๐Ÿ’˜๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ‘‘๏ปฟ
twitch chat
November 2017
Text-to-Speech Playing